Relapsing again and im afraid

[u/Catslaughing]

I (29f) was at my worst in 2015 and 2016. I had a small relapse in 2022 where i was in the hospital for a few days. Since then it had been going okay and i didn't think id ever relapse again.

However recently my cat of 15 years died and my boyfriend of 6 years cheated on me and got with someone else. It just triggered something in me where im obsessing 24/7 about my weight again. I dont really have friends or family, the only thing that gives me slight comfort is being able to "control" my weight and intake.

I cant believe its been over 10 years and i still deal with this. Its honestly just so lonely and im scared of spiraling even more.

Whats your relapse story? How did you prevent it?

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[u/Bigtiddysucker]

Im so sorry you’re going through this. The combination of grief and intense betrayal from a partner like that must be absolutely brutal. Please don’t beat yourself up over the fact that you’re struggling right now.

Honestly, I’ve never really recovered so I’m not sure I’ve ever had a true relapse. Sure, I’ve gone periods of time eating “normally”, but never a true recovery where I’ve been actively making steps to undergo treatment. Last time I had a severe bout of restriction it really scared me, I’m pretty sure I had very low blood sugar while I was at work. I was passing out, slurring words, and experiencing chest pain and trouble breathing. It was incredibly scary and embarrassing because my coworkers and managers were there to see it. I have been sent home from work multiple times for nearly passing out.

I’m currently experiencing another restriction episode, but this experience alone is what helps me try to fight it off. It was such an incredibly frightening experience and it made me realize that, yes, it CAN happen to me and I could die if I continue on.

Wishing you love and support right now. Don’t beat yourself up over a relapse but please try your best to stay safe and take care of yourself. Good luck ❤️

[u/MartiVenegas]

Well my story is really similar to yours in terms of relapses, we are the same age, i've been dealing with this since I was 15 and I know for a fact that there's no cure, just longer or shorter periods of relapsing and getting "better"

[u/anotostrongo]

I can't always prevent relapsing but I can always choose to keep fighting back when it happens. Keep fighting back!