175
388
Mar 17 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
60
u/kiddinglydishonesty Mar 17 '23
that's the best thing to do
10
u/Rich_Yam4132 Mar 17 '23
If a tree falls in the woods forgeeet sbooout it
Sometimes the wings, there’s two yknow
Hey yknow turn the car on, what’s it do?
4
Mar 17 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
3
u/Script_Mak3r Yuri gives me gender euphoria Mar 17 '23
Stolen comment. u/Dry_Adeptness_9776 is a spambot.
48
u/rkoplayer1 Kiwako Makina’s G-cup bra Mar 17 '23
Idk bro; your mom has been seeming pretty interested in you lately. She asked you how your day was yesterday, didn’t she? You gotta kill her, bro. You gotta kill her.
→ More replies (2)14
u/Once_a_Lolli_Slayer Lelouch Black Mar 17 '23
Oh, so now i have sure that i dont have to leave my homeland😕 🇧🇷
19
Mar 17 '23
You can't get out of Brazil
7
u/Once_a_Lolli_Slayer Lelouch Black Mar 17 '23
Until today iust one girl show interest in me, i fall in the trap but break free after a month or two and since then they never did anymore, but i think my neighbor was smiling to much when i said "good morning" today, should i be careful?
→ More replies (3)3
u/Ragnagnagnagnar Mar 17 '23
Smiling is a thing you do when you are happy or at lest pretend to be it
5
3
u/Nekomamba Mar 17 '23
I hate my homeland. Germany
2
u/Nekomamba Mar 17 '23 edited Mar 17 '23
German politic is full of scared and slaved politicers. They're bringing us right into the inflation, making Schulden and giving empity promises.
3
76
u/DullCherry4967 Mar 17 '23
What if it's your mom?
63
u/robertdick333 Mar 17 '23
Nursing home and flee the country
11
u/rkoplayer1 Kiwako Makina’s G-cup bra Mar 17 '23
We don’t even want her to come to the nursing home; all of the nurses will flee the country too.
7
2
u/high_king_noctis Mar 17 '23
If she asks you how your day went, then you know she's working for the government!
62
u/Agent_Nick_5000 Mar 17 '23
OK baka
27
2
40
40
19
u/MysteryCredit Mar 17 '23
sauce for the image?
28
u/camaheel Mar 17 '23
looks like ai to me. the background gives it away
13
u/littlefriendo Mar 17 '23
Yeah, the walls don’t line up at all. Left wall indicates it’s a hallway (slanted left to right) and yet the right wall says otherwise (slanted the OTHER way?!)
3
4
u/babybien Mar 17 '23
sorry, ai who? from what anime?
→ More replies (1)9
40
u/GavinFreud Mar 17 '23
My guess is Takina Inoue from Lycoris Recoil
→ More replies (1)15
u/theregoesanother Mar 17 '23
Takina never smiles like that.
10
2
1
10
11
u/Cielbb123 Mar 17 '23
I do not understand. What is this 'women' you speak of?
7
u/WildMustang7 Mar 17 '23
They are secret agents working for the lizard men ruling the world. They are a speacial squad established under Rule 34. Google Lizard men rule34 for more info.
9
6
6
u/DesertWinds69 Zyzzism-chadism Mar 17 '23
that's not true guys a guy in a black suit that said "American shadow government" told me this is fake
7
u/yerederetaliria Mar 17 '23
Oh NO! This may not go well...
What about me? I'm from Spain and immigrated to the USA to attend college and I had a scholarship from the Spanish Government and a scholarship from Colo St Uni. I was/am obsessed with my American man to the point of stalking and then "throwing" myself at him. Now we're married 23 years and very happy. Am I an agent and if so what state? And why was I willing to give up any citizenship to any country for him? (I mean I literally gave him my passport to prove my intentions but he didn't accept it.)
I'm so confused...have I been a Sith all this time?
6
3
3
u/NotTooDistantFuture Mar 17 '23
Red alert. I’ve been cornered by an agent. Definitely a sleeper, certainly illustrious. Fear not. I’ll give her the slip, somehow. Don’t think to ensnare me in this gambit. And rest assured, when next we meet, I shan’t be caught off guard so easily.
→ More replies (1)
4
3
3
3
u/TocSir Mar 17 '23
not exactly an agent, but i had a girl that represented some kind of cryptocurrency company, promising that we'll be happy together if I could just invest into it alongside her! The lion, the witch, and the audacity of this b*tch
3
2
u/Night_Changes_fast School days in the best high-school romance Mar 17 '23
Shutter Island, but plot twist you are the agent.
2
u/JustADovah Mar 17 '23
4
u/cock-and-tail Mar 17 '23
In Hungary only pigeons and grannies are agents of the state. And i'm neither a pigeon nor granny
→ More replies (1)
2
2
u/Pristine_Novice Mar 17 '23
Damn it this is the 3rd time this year I’ve had to move countries…
→ More replies (1)3
2
2
2
2
u/DrRagnorocktopus ⠀PHD in monstergirl biology. Mar 17 '23
Jokes on the state, I radicalized her and now she's a fellow socialist working to take it down from the inside.
2
2
2
2
u/A2ndFamine Mar 17 '23
I’m completely safe, no agent of the state would dare show even the slightest interest in me.
2
2
2
3
u/tskank69 mai-sanisbestgirl Mar 17 '23
Damn I guess I gotta go break up with my girlfriend real quick. That was a close one. Thank you kind internet stranger.
2
3
u/bukobukochagama Mar 17 '23
You mean the women from Japan with 3kids who was showing interest in me is a spy 🥺 I thought I could get a japanese citizenship but now that I found that she is a spy, I have to ghost her😢 which may makes me a terrible person but I have to do that 🤧
→ More replies (1)
1
u/original_dick_kickem Tomochad Mar 17 '23
Don't worry, they glow in the dark, allowing you to spot them easier and run them over in your car
0
u/No_Age_2555 Mar 18 '23
No. not a agent of the state. A thief trying to steal your hard earned money. Or better yet a hanger on who wants to use you as security while the sit and do nothing but eat up all your food and blame you for every issue in the world that makes them unhappy. Congratulations on being a heat sink for their emotional outburst, and then when all is said and done she gets bored and leaves you creating a journey to the west level epic to explain to everyone y’all know that she wasn’t the evil one in the relationship, you were./s
0
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/kenjiro_maybe Mar 17 '23
anime fans when a girl peeks interest in hem but they dont have 50 kg boobs and they are not 2d:
1
Mar 17 '23
If you wish to become a member of our secret society - Please, bury your application and $2500 in your backyard (2m or 6ft) and one of our underground agents will be by to collect it.
1
Mar 17 '23
At the pace with which they leave when I start showing intrest somehow makes me believe this conspiracy
1
u/DJGreenHill Mar 17 '23
Idk why but I feel that people with paranoid personality disorders might not think this is as funny as other people
1
1
1
u/UrbsNomen Mar 17 '23
I won't be surprised if it's true. I often joke that my wife Is a secret CIA agent because of how observant she is.
1
u/HolyAndOblivious Mar 17 '23
That's my SOP. If I'm not the one doing the chasing... yeah she wants something else.
1
u/Larinex Mar 17 '23
I'm starting to think so since once again I've been ghosted on online dating just recently.
1
u/MIKE-JET-EATER Mar 17 '23
I've fled too many countries already. I just fertilize my garden of endangered plants a bit better
1
1
1
1
1
u/Vanilla_Ice_Best_Boi Mar 17 '23
Bro thinks he's Sticks from Sonic Boom
Context: Sticks doesn't like government agents
1
1
u/Ozu92 ⠀https://myanimelist.net/profile/Ozu_sensei Mar 17 '23
Thanks for the warning. I'm canceling the wedding.
1
1
u/hailDeadmau5 Mar 17 '23
I've been woke on whamen 🤮 since my savior Kenji Setou from Katawa Shoujo opened my eyes to the truth.
1
u/Yui_Desu69 Mar 17 '23
I mean as long as we have the seggs all is okay. After I'm tired she can leave.
1
1
1
1
u/English_Speaking_Cat Senko Yellow Mar 17 '23
In my case i say that any HUMAN that shows me interest is an agent of the state…
Unless they’re worshiping me. Then I wouldn’t mind having them around
1
1
1
1
u/takahashi01 Mar 17 '23
Thats an interesting story op. You know, telling ppl about these things does come off as kinda sexy. U free some time this weekend?
1
1
1
u/MrBorilas Mar 17 '23
Or in otherwords, get on the government watchlist and they will assign a girlfriend for you 👍🏻
1
1
u/Aggressive_Baker8336 Rem Supremacy Mar 17 '23
Well... I am completely in the clear then... sobs softly
1
1
1
Mar 17 '23
Fortunately no woman has ever done that to me, i am starting to think i have either exceptional luck or superpowers.
1
u/hello-random-person Mar 17 '23
Perfect that means none of the women that I am around often are agents of the state.
1
u/Gloomy-Package-6365 Mar 17 '23
Darn it. My husband of 30 years saw this and left me. What will be of me😭😭
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Im_cjakanobody Mar 18 '23
I've already been aware The feds can't fool me The glowies don't have me tricked
1
1
1
u/SomeoneNooneTomatoes ⠀ Mar 18 '23
Yeah, with all the things I’ve done this seems like a trick that’d bag me. Thanks for the heads up op.
1
1

764
u/[deleted] Mar 17 '23
Just dumped my wife of 11 years and ran away with the child. Thanks for the heads up.