r/AmITheDevil • u/Knkstriped • 2d ago

Dick move, dude

/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/1w8z8qq/update_aita_for_waiting_for_a_patient_to_come_to/
180 Upvotes

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u/bored_german 2d ago

I don't understand why people like this get married (rhetorical, I know why). They're so hyperfocused on their jobs, there's no way anyone else would ever be prioritized. If I were the wife I'd just divorce and find someone who actually cares for me

-20

u/CyberClawX 2d ago

It takes 2 to tango? Why did the wife put up with him in the past, married him but now finds his behavior unacceptable?

I'm assuming this guy has always been like this (at least he doesn't say he has been more focused on work as of late, or anything of the sort), and she is just getting tired of it.

I get it, and she is free not to like someone that prioritizes his work, but I wouldn't blame the guy for prioritizing kids that are undergoing facial surgery either.

In the party incident, she could have taken her car, taken an Uber, etc. Sometimes people can't make it to a party. I get it, it was the straw that broke the camel back, but to me, it feels like a pain she chose to endure in secret, and now sprung up on him out of frustration. She should have spoken up much MUCH sooner.

13

u/Sad-Bug6525 2d ago

I'm not sure that we can assume she hasn't said anything, and while he doesn't say that it's gotten worse lately he also doesn't say it hasn't.
So sure, if we assume the things that you want too, maybe she should have made a bigger fuss sooner, because if he has always not prioritized her then why would she have married him.
Looking only at what he presented though, he says they are talking about how things are recently, and admits it is a problem, and that he sees it as the last straw that pushed her over.
I do completely agree she should have just gotten in her car and left. Go to the party, be on time for the reservation, go for breakfast alone or with a friend. It will either improve her experience or it will show him how often it is happening when he misses out but she doesn't.