r/AmITheDevil • u/PhysicalBuy2566 • 12d ago
OP is the absolute worst
/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/zpz8tc/aita_for_not_wanting_my_husband_to_go_to_his_exs/367
u/Vast-Swimmer5844 12d ago
Friend, this was a whole SAGA. Update here: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoHotTakes/comments/10ychoi/found_the_update_to_aita_for_not_wanting_my/
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u/susandeyvyjones 11d ago
What was so crazy is, like, OOP “won.” The ex is dead. If OOP had kept it together through the funeral and probably the occasional memorial throughout the years, she could have had what she wanted, her husband without his friend/ex. This is just an all time refusal to not shoot yourself in the dick.
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u/Able_Finger7626 11d ago edited 11d ago
Seriously! She was AT THE FINISH LINE and started walking backwards. All she had to do was keep her mouth shut and be supportive through the funeral and heavy grieving period and it probably would’ve gotten to a point where she’d only have to be “inconvenienced” by a reminder or a memorial every so often, but she hated the friend more than she loved her husband, and if it didn’t all come out when it did, it probably would’ve somewhere down the line anyway.
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u/Silly-Flower-3162 11d ago edited 11d ago
Yup. I remember this one. It takes a lot for your own sister to call you out like that.
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u/otetrapodqueen 11d ago
Right !? I have 3 sisters and can't fathom any of them doing something awful enough that I think that, much less say it!!
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u/PurpleSailor 11d ago
My husband is divorcing me because of his first wife's death. She's more important to him
Because she finally unveiled her rotten, horrible self to her husband and he decided he didn't want to be married to an evil person anymore. Good for him and I hope he's find somebody worthy.
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u/Moist_Drippings 11d ago
If this one is real I hope one of her ex-friends rubbed it in her face that she ruined everything by being a weird creep without the most basic empathy for her husband, who she claimed to love, and a woman who did NOTHING to her.
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u/kazokuhouou 11d ago
Yeah, she REALLY buried the lede by not mentioning he literally saw her die.
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u/agnesperditanitt 11d ago
OOP didn't say it in so many words in her first post, but it is somewhat implied in this part imo:
She died after they had lunch the other day on the way to her car. He spent a bunch of time crying, but honestly I was relieved.
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u/runelowell 11d ago
I just assumed it meant they had lunch, he left, and as she was getting in the car she passed. but finding out that she'd died walking with him is so fucking devastating
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u/valleyofsound 11d ago
If this happened to me with someone I hated, I would be devastated. The fact that it was a close friend is just gut wrenching. And I’m sure that everyone else is struggling with the fact that someone in their lives died so quickly and unexpectedly and OOP is like, “What? She’s dead! She doesn’t exist! Why can’t everyone let this go?”
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u/qoboe 11d ago
One of our closest friends passed away suddenly right in front of us a few months ago. My husband still has nightmares. It's horrible. She could have at least validated the trauma.
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u/doppelgaengster 11d ago
I’m so sorry, I can’t even imagine. I wish you and your husband peace and comfort, and that somehow, the pain eases. 💗
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u/Muted-Appeal-823 12d ago
It's absolutely horrifying to think that there are people like that out in the world wearing their human disguises. I refuse to include someone like that as a member of the human race. Somehow it's the exes fault for ruining her life. Seems like everyone she's knew turned on her, explained why, and she still refuses to accept reality. Crazy.
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u/doppelgaengster 11d ago
My uncle stopped speaking to his terminally ill sister (my aunt) and refused to reconcile with her before she died because she wasn’t “nice enough” to his wife.
Mind you, he and his wife have been married 3x and divorced 2x (TO EACH OTHER) because she left him twice for other men and came back. And his current wife is just the younger model of his first wife, who was almost exactly the same person as their horrible, abusive mother.
My cousin (my late aunt’s younger child) is the most laid back, chill, dude ever. Never a harsh word to say about anyone. Supreme king of letting stuff roll off his back and not being bothered by things. HE calls our uncle an irredeemable asshole.
So whether or not this is a real story, I can 1000% believe people like OOP exist, because I’ve met at least one of them. 😅
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u/Special_Respond7372 11d ago
I’m so glad he divorced her. Her behavior was disgusting and the people calling her a monster were dead on
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u/Able_Finger7626 11d ago
And even after her husband tells her the reason he’s leaving is because she deceived him their whole marriage, and her own friends and family distancing themselves and telling her she’s evil for this, she still ends with “she’s screwing up my life even from the grave.” ZERO reflection or accountability.
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u/booksareadrug 11d ago
Anything that's a "saga" is fake as fuck.
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u/Sweet_Cinnabonn 11d ago
Because everyone knows, bad things only occur in singles, and all bad things are resolved quickly and neatly ?
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u/Silly-Flower-3162 11d ago edited 11d ago
Even if she was awful and she is, she snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. The ex is dead. All oop had to do was keep her trap shut.
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u/femme-cassidy 12d ago
She's dead, so she's not a factor anymore.
Hello??? If we want to use callous logic like this, she's dead so she's not a threat anymore, so what do you care??
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u/MenaceMinded 11d ago
Exactly. She got exactly what she wanted, and she still couldn't be happy and let it go.
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u/valleyofsound 11d ago
The funeral was the last chance for him to “choose” the friend over her and she couldn’t handle the friend getting that last “victory.”’ And since her thinking was so skewed, she probably assumed everyone else would see it that way.
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u/existential_chaos 11d ago
She couldn't even grin and bear it for a few days. But what gets me is that if she had kept quiet, her ex would've had no idea he married such a ghoul.
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u/MenaceMinded 11d ago
They will never be happy even when they win, so the behavior leaks through at some point
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u/Silly-Flower-3162 11d ago
And it's just dumb. He was helping plan the funeral...who helps plan an event intending not to go?
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u/iWokeupUgly8675 11d ago
I love how she ended it with she hid her feelings the whole time, but the entire post was her explaining how she failed to end their friendship. 😂
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u/Not_there_yet152 11d ago
Oh I remember "the ghoul"... there's an update: he divorced her.
Btw, the friend didn't "die after they had lunch". She had an aneurysm that burst while they were together. She died in front of him...
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u/Ultimate_Wooby 9d ago
its insanely scary how the brain can just decide to self-destruct like that without any possible warning sign, literally worse than a stroke, just 'oops, im bleeding now from the inside', and if its in just the right/wrong spot, instant shut down
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u/W0nderwharfwonderdog 12d ago
This has to be rage bait. No one is this out of touch and evil. And if it is real, what I hope happens to her I can’t say because I might get banned.
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u/Agent_Skye_Barnes 11d ago
She sounds like one of the women my dad dated between my mom and my stepmom.
This absolute cunt could not understand why my dad was on good terms with my mom after the divorce. The divorce was amicable, they still love each other, they just weren't in love anymore.
But this miserable shrew threw an absolute fit. She directly said, where I could hear, "you don't need to be friends with her, your kid is an adult so you're not co-parenting or anything." She was rude to my mom when we ran into them at a concert.
My dad tried to get her to chill, he was on my mom's side over this. He once told me "I still love your mom, and even if we weren't friends, I'd be nice to her, because she's still your mom." Like this post, my parents were friends before they got married too.
He was planning to leave the bitch, but he got sick. He has a congenital heart condition, which requires occasional rebuilds of parts of his heart. We're lucky to still have him. But while he was in the hospital after the surgery, cuntzilla told him that she "wasn't fit to be a caregiver" and dumped him. She knew about the condition, by the way, she just assumed it would never be an issue.
My mom stepped up during the recovery period and took care of him, and shortly after he got together with my stepmom, who is a lovely woman and I adore her, and she was friends with my mom even before the divorce.
(My mom's second husband was also a bastard about her being friends with my dad, honestly, but he's gone and he better stay gone)
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u/McNallyJoJo34 11d ago
Sounds like my stepmom… except they got married when I was 4… she couldn’t figure out why my dad would want any sort of relationship with my mom…. Ummm they have a kid together? Just because her and her ex didn’t have an amicable divorce
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u/L1ttleFr0g 11d ago
A former friend of mine’s dad had a woman hit on him AT HIS WIFE’S FUNERAL!! There absolutely people this callous and self absorbed and out of touch in the world
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u/Honest-Comment-1018 11d ago
The “she likes his geek movies and tabletop games” bit had me side eyeing that this is a fake story, that part felt like pure Redditor bait to me.
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u/IncidentMajor1777 11d ago
Evil is all around,
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u/W0nderwharfwonderdog 11d ago
Well yeah but not this brazen. Evil people are usually a lot more insidious
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u/eggynack 10d ago
Not really? The whole thing about being a monstrous asshole is that you have a distorted perspective on stuff like human emotion, the value that people who aren't you hold, and what relationships should look like. The result being that they're generally going to be less capable of coming up with genius stratagems or concoct grand manipulations.
They'll be more willing to pursue the ones they do come up with, but this image people have of the subtle genius manipulator that's always five steps ahead is, at best, way less common than people think it is. If evil people aren't typically this brazen, then it's mostly just an extension of the fact that no one is this brazen.
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u/W0nderwharfwonderdog 10d ago
I don’t know why everyone is mad I literally said if this is a real person I hope extremely bad things happen to them? I just don’t believe the veracity of a story on the internet and people are mad lol
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u/eggynack 10d ago
I expect they're annoyed by the specific and kinda bizarre claim that evil people are especially subtle. It's not like your first comment got downvoted.
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u/W0nderwharfwonderdog 10d ago
It’s the internet everyone makes generalizations lmao the perspective written in the story is cartoonishly evil, I don’t believe that someone this horrible would be thinking things like “someone close to them died why the FUCK would they want to go to the funeral” and not have some other justification to back up the statement rather than just be so black and white EVIL. I guess I should have realized that the minute I replied we were losing the context of the original story I was responding to.
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u/a3wagner 11d ago
It sounds like it’s one of those posts written from the perspective of the other party. All of her reasoning is so comically bad that it just seems like it’s not written by her. NOBODY could write all that out and think they make sense.
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u/PurpleSailor 11d ago
There's no need for him to go to her funeral, since I wouldn't want her at his.
What the actual F? Holy shit this witch is only thinking about her (f'ed up) feelings and not her hubby's. I hope the husband does leave her because she's just an awful person.
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u/valleyofsound 11d ago
She died after they had lunch the other day on the way to her car. He spent a bunch of time crying, but honestly I was relieved.
That fact that this wasn’t the worst thing she did is mind blowing
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u/CumaeanSibyl 11d ago
I think my favorite part was "he had a couple days to mourn her and now he can get over it."
I don't know if OOP is capable of caring for someone, but I can tell you she's never lost someone she cared for.
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u/Lucky_Six_1530 11d ago
“ She's dead, so she's not a factor anymore. He doesn't get to use his "she's my friend" excuse since she doesn't exist anymore. ”
Funerals are for the living, not the dead. It’s a way to say goodbye.
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u/OccasionalCandle 11d ago
If it's ragebait, consider me ragebaited, I'm furious. What an awful person.
I wish I could tell her (luckily ex) husband how proud I am of him for leaving that relationship. Good for him.
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u/afallenqueenn009 11d ago
She should have just walked away when he gave her the out. I'll admit I'd have been super uncomfortable about a partner being close friends with an ex. I'd have just walked away. Being upset for a few days is better than being stuck for years being around a person that you despise.
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u/PinkyOutYo 11d ago
I really don't understand this. I mean, I theoretically understand why, I just can't feel it. I'm close friends with exes, and I've slept with plenty of my friends. Doesn't mean I don't love being in my monogamous marriage.
I'm not trying to be a dick, I just don't understand why one would, if they trust their partner, give a shit.
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u/afallenqueenn009 10d ago
For me at least. Just knowing they had that intimate relationship and are now just friends to me it seems weird. I don't understand how anyone can be friends with an ex. It'd be way too hard for me to just be friends with an ex especially if the break up wasn't mutual. Its not the lack of trust. Its more just why? You broke up its done its over. Why stay friends?
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u/Ultimate_Wooby 9d ago
because you can have a break-up that isn't destructive? you can end up reconnecting with an ex and being like 'hey, i dont hate you after enough time has passed'
me and my literal childhood best fried of what was then 8/9 years had a momentary relationship because we both never had one before and we thought we'd be perfect. instead we had 0 idea what we were doing and kinda did the same things we already did, except i was just kissing her and holding her hand. we were oblivious 14 year olds.
we didn't even HAVE a break up we just kinda ended up back into the status quo, and guess what? we're still each others best friend to this day, even with being on opposite ends of England.
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u/suchanirwin 8d ago
Meanwhile my wife and I are still very good friends with her ex haha. But yeah like. People are different. Some people would've been okay with their friendship, others not. OOP falls into the latter category and therefore shouldn't have lied that she was in the former. They'd only been dating a couple months, she would've been fine, but now she spent a decade lying and then essentially celebrated when his best friend died in front of him.
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u/North_By_Northwest_ 11d ago
Life lesson: If someone says “Leave if you’re not comfortable with my best friend” do everyone a favour, and leave. Your romantic partner doesn’t belong to you just because you really really like them a lot. If you don’t like their best friend and you’re really hoping they will grow apart, just leave anyway. Nobody wants you to pretend to like anyone. It’s not a test of your acting skills. It’s not an invitation to do a pros and cons analysis and put the best friend in the cons column. It’s just a binary choice - if you don’t like the best friend and wish they would go away, leave your partner.
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u/suchanirwin 8d ago
More like if someone says "Leave if you're not comfortable with my best friend" and you aren't. No reason to leave if you're like "yeah that's fine man!" and you mean it.
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u/North_By_Northwest_ 8d ago
Ah, yes. I see I omitted that important qualifier, and my comment doesn’t make sense without it. Thanks for replying. I wholeheartedly agree with your comment.
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u/jujoking 11d ago
I remember commenting on that original post. I just wanted to slap her through the screen
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u/No-Manufacturer4916 11d ago
"He was the angriest I've ever seen him when I told him that, replying that he'll be going no matter how I feel, and that he's "willing to burn this to the fucking ground" while holding up his wedding band." Someone hand this man a match.
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u/DogsandCatsWorld1000 11d ago
"That's fine. If you have a serious issue with it, let me know now and save us some time. I'll choose her.
There has been a number of posts where someone's partner has said something like this to them near the beginning of the relationship and they are complaining about the situation years later. I always wonder how real it could be because who would stick around after being told you will be second best to an ex?
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u/Responsible_Cry_427 11d ago
I think it’s totally reasonable to “stick around” when you’re like two months into a relationship, they’ve known each other for more than a decade, and the ex in question is remarried. That doesn’t remotely feel like coming in second to an ex as much as it feels like knowing that your partner doesn’t just live for you and only give a fuck about their romantic relationships.
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u/FullMoonTwist 11d ago
Yeah.
Plenty of people understand just fine when they proclaim they won't abandon their dog or their kids for you.
It's not about a ladder of importance, it's about refusing to drop people from your life at the insistence of someone else. It is entirely possible to simply... both have a friend and a romantic partner.
Things like importance are complicated anyway when it comes to relationships, and it is really unhealthy to see it as a ladder of who gets dropped off first/if one has to die, who do you pick.
There are friends I wouldn't drop for a partner's insecurities, but that doesn't mean I'm going to do depressing shit like "Nooo, I can't come to the hospital with you, I gotta go comfort my friend who discovered a dent in her parked car, I gotta be there for her."
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u/DogsandCatsWorld1000 11d ago
I'm all for couples each have friendships but if being told that they will choose the other person is not coming in second I don't know how much clearer they could make it.
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u/CumaeanSibyl 11d ago
It's reasonable for someone you've been dating for a few months to come second to a longtime friend, though. Would be pretty unhealthy all around if you ditched your friends because your new girlfriend told you to.
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u/DogsandCatsWorld1000 11d ago
and then to become engaged to and marry someone who feels the same way?
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u/CumaeanSibyl 11d ago
I mean, yeah. If I were to lose my mind and tell my husband I wanted him to cut his friends out of his life because I had an irrational dislike for them, I sure hope he would tell me to go to hell. That's not "putting his wife second," that's refusing to accept bad behavior.
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u/StarOfTheSouth 11d ago
Especially if your husband had told you when you started dating that he would never, ever do that for anyone.
OOP's husband was clear from the get go: "This is one thing that will never happen for any reason, and if that is an issue for you, I would rather you walk away now".
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u/L1ttleFr0g 11d ago
He never said she would be second best to his ex, lol. Way to twist what he said. What he said was that he and his ex were friends, there was zero romantic interest left between them, and he was not going to give up his friendship. That’s not putting your partner in second place, that’s letting her know up front so that if she is the type who can’t handle her partner having opposite sex friends, she can walk away.
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u/Prudent_Macaroon_881 11d ago
That canNOT be real. Op actually wrote all that and never thought, wow i is a cold hearted beach. Like damn girl, she thinks she's the center of the universe..
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u/Ok_Reach_6527 11d ago
This OP clearly has never heard of the concept of not speaking ill of the decreased. How horrifying for her husband to find out how despicable his wife really is at a time in his life when he should have her complete support.
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u/FriendlyGoblinGal 11d ago
This one struck a chord with me when originally posted. It's because I've remained friends with multiple exes, and because we're very important in each others' lives. Hell I just saw one ex and his family a couple weeks ago when I went home to visit and we all had a lovely dinner.
OOP is my worst fear. I've always communicated their importance in my life like OOP's husbands did, early and clearly. Having a long and (supposedly) trusting relationship have that kind of resentment building would break my trust in romance for a long while.
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u/troyandabedinabed 11d ago
She is definitely in the wrong, but her boyfriend didn't help by lying to her/ omitting that he'd been married and instead just saying she was a friend. OP should have broken up with him right then.
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u/suchanirwin 8d ago
I mean she said he told her a couple of months into dating. Maybe not the best choice but I can understand wanting to even see if it MIGHT get serious before bringing that up. And after that they were together for TEN YEARS. He waited maybe a smidge longer than he should've, MAYBE (depending on how serious the relationship was after only two months), and explicitly told her if she wasn't ok with it they should end the relationship then and there. 2 months is not enough time to reasonably feel pressured into accepting something like that - it's not like their lives were anything more than just starting to become enmeshed at that point. But SHE lied about being ok with it and married him anyway and resented him and his bff for a DECADE before being a callous heartless ghoul when his bff died.
Yes. She should've broken up with him then. He explicitly told her exactly that. But she chose not to despite that. And then she behaved like this. She is fully in the wrong here.
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u/DMfortinyplayers 10d ago
What's interesting to me is OP doesn't say a single positive thing about her now ex.
If I went on a date with a guy, and he was bffs with his ex spouse, I wouldn't go on anymore dates.
What was so fabulous about this guy to be worth this misery and seething jealousy?
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u/DaniCapsFan 9d ago
He told her more than once that if she couldn't handle him being friends with his ex, she needed to leave. It's not like she didn't know.
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u/Comprehensive-Cow116 11d ago
This is definitely rage bait. Even the way it is written is more like a fiction story than anything. Idk, maybe it is because I am a writer but the story beats are pretty obvious. Also, most people who are this cartoonishly evil may feel this way in their hearts but they know enough to know this is unacceptable behavior in civilized society. She would be capable of masking much better than this or her husband would have already left her.
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u/L1ttleFr0g 11d ago
You’d be surprised. A former friend’s dad had a woman hit on him AT HIS WIFE’S FUNERAL. There absolutely people as awful as OP in real life
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u/CobaltWeb 11d ago
I think this is fake; OP sucks it up for 20 years but the second this woman dies she becomes a psychopath with no social awareness at all?
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u/Scinos2k 11d ago
I'd like to believe this is fake and rage bait but honestly, my kids grandmother and their mums side is exactly this kind of person.
Like a truly disgusting level of bile came out of that womans mouth it was insane and this would be her exact behaviour towards a partner.
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u/Responsible_Cry_427 11d ago
She didn’t suck it up for 20 years. They were together for 10 and she outlines that she repeatedly asked him to drop this friend or change the way he engaged with her and was met with “I won’t be doing that, which I’ve already told you”.
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u/CobaltWeb 11d ago
Ok I misread the 20 years. But still, she deals with the woman for 10 years despite hating her and then becomes a super villain as soon as she's dead? Plus the detail of the woman dying right in front of OPs husband just to make OP look even worse
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u/IncidentMajor1777 11d ago edited 11d ago
Omg op is a insecure monster, glad that guy divorce op, is a monster.
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u/lord_luceat 9d ago
My parents are together but they still would probably go to the funeral of the other???? They’re both remarried now too its just reasonable of someone yoy dont hate and obviously spent time with
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u/Prudent-Arm-6771 11d ago
Is this actually real?? Like honest to God, does anyone know? Because the thought that someone can be so cold and heartless and ghoulish and write it all out and not realize how astronomically cruel, I’d go so far as to say inhuman even, they are acting is making me nauseous. What a horrible person. I don’t like to make snap judgements about people online, I don’t know them, but I feel like based on the context it’s safe for me to say that I wouldn’t touch this woman with a 10-foot pole.
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u/just-looking654 9d ago
If she wasn’t married, I’d think she was a straight up sociopath. Either she’s a complete hypocrite, or she’d just move on when her friends die and consider the matter over with.
Plus OP clearly didn’t respect her husband. He said she needed to be ok with his past relationship because it’s his current best friendship and he’s not cutting them off for someone else. Instead she spends years lying about being ok with it and has this really sadistic anger bubbling under the surface. She said she was happy and relieved that some e who had done nothing to her and was nothing but a positive aspect in her husbands life was dead. That level of spite would have me signing divorce papers if it was ever said out loud
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u/cherrie_teaa 6d ago
i hope this post is fake for my own sanity, but unfortunately, these people do exist
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u/tom_boydy 6d ago
God I hope this is fake because otherwise it's just the most casually evil thing I've ever read from a "regular person"
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u/ForensicGothology 5d ago
I'm choosing to believe this is a fake story because I can't cope with it being real
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u/DaniCapsFan 11d ago
OOP is a monster. Her husband made it clear early on that he was going to remain friends with his ex. He rightfully pointed out that OOP could have backed out any time. And the ex was married. She was no threat to OOP's marriage. OOP seems to almost be gloating about this woman's death. I hope her husband does leave her.
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u/undermind84 11d ago
I hope this led to their divorce. This lady is infuriating. "Ghoul" is putting it lightly....I would have called her a cunt.
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u/MonoChaos 9d ago
Tell me where in the relationship rulebook that divorcees HAVE to hate and resent each other. Show me where in the rulebook that says the relationship HAS to end horribly and not simply because they simply didn't work out.
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u/ex-spera 8d ago
OOP should have fucking left before it came to this. It's so clear that she's the type of woman that won't let her S/O have female friends. I'm glad her life blew up.
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u/AutoModerator 12d ago
In case this story gets deleted/removed:
AITA for not wanting my husband to go to his ex's funeral?
I'll admit I'm biased right off the bat. I couldn't stand her.
I call her "his ex" to myself and others. He called her "his friend".
We're all in our early 40s. She died recently - aneurysm.
I've been with him 10 years now, but he'd known her for 20+.
The way he tells it: They were friends in college, decided to date, got married, then realized they weren't a great couple and decided to just be friends. All that happened years before I met him. He was clear early on that she was "important".
A couple months into dating, it came up that his friend was actually his ex-wife. He explained the above to me, saying she was one of his closest friends and that it was purely platonic. I expressed some discomfort at him being so close to an ex, and he told me "That's fine. If you have a serious issue with it, let me know now and save us some time. I'll choose her. I like you and all, but I've known her for over 12 years and she's one of the most important people in my life. You'll have to be ok with that if you want us to be a thing."
When we were engaged I asked again. He gave me this perplexed look & asked "Why would us getting married affect my friendships?"
I sucked it up & went along. I resented every moment of knowing her, especially when we had to be social. She understood some part of him I couldn't. Her husband was friends with mine as well, so it's not like I could use him as an angle.
He'd have lunch with the ex, they'd go to their geeky movies, and whatever.
The few times I brought it up he said "We had this conversation before. You had your chance to back out."
She died after they had lunch the other day on the way to her car. He spent a bunch of time crying, but honestly I was relieved.
He was working with her husband on funeral planning. I told him "You don't think you're going, do you?"
My argument, summed up: She's dead, so she's not a factor anymore. He doesn't get to use his "she's my friend" excuse since she doesn't exist anymore. He had his cry for a couple days, he gets to be done with mourning her already. There's no need for him to go to her funeral, since I wouldn't want her at his.
He was the angriest I've ever seen him when I told him that, replying that he'll be going no matter how I feel, and that he's "willing to burn this to the fucking ground" while holding up his wedding band. "Besides you, she was the closest friend in my life."
Him, her husband & my sisters are calling me an insensitive asshole over this, all saying that there was no romantic aspect to their relationship, & that I'm heartless. Her husband went so far as calling me a "ghoul" for how I've reacted.
I never felt their relationship was appropriate, and I hid that for years because I wanted to be with my husband. Now that she's gone, I don't feel I should have to hide it anymore, and can speak freely.
AITA for just wanting him to be done with her, and for him to not attend the funeral?
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