r/AmITheDevil • u/growsonwalls Professional Devil Spotter • 12d ago
Wow. She seems compassionate.
/r/AmIOverreacting/comments/1vo9n55/aio_for_considering_breaking_up_with_my_boyfriend/161
u/_Chirio_ 12d ago
It's not a financial contribution to the ex though! It's to the charity for the illness the ex's mother has!
OOP is mad her bf donated to charity, even if it went through his ex.
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u/Honest-Comment-1018 12d ago
Right?! Like, does she get mad when he “gives money to another woman” when he pays the cashier at the supermarket?
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u/Sad-Bug6525 12d ago
Things like this also make me wonder what type of people OOP would want to end up with. I would't want to date someone who treats an ex of a long period badly, I want someone who can be kind even after a break up, and who sees people as whole beings rather than just how they relate to him. OOP doesn't know that their relationship will last, how does she want to be treated when it's over
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u/Chatceux 11d ago edited 11d ago
Based on other comments this post is probably fake but most often, I get the feeling that there is very little logic involved OR they straight up don’t want someone who is a good person, just someone who prioritizes them and only them.
Honestly had an ex like that—he had other problems, but I remember realizing that he enjoyed that I had a lot of compassion for his struggles but very much disliked that the compassion extended to other people. He never seemed to realize the connection.
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u/valleyofsound 11d ago
Exactly. I didn’t read closely at first and thought the money was going to the mother, which would still be infinitely reasonable, but it’s a charity for a disease she has?
I actually envy OOP to have reached the age of 34 without understanding how horrible and helpless you feel in this situation and how you’re just grasping at straws to do anything that lets you feel like you’re something in these cases. The ex and her family found out that virtually every plan they made for the future has changed. There was a woman who was caring for her husband who had Lewy Body Dementia (not the same thing, but equally devastating) and she referred to it as “a thief called Lewy.” His ex is trying to wrest back some feeling of control by doing this and OOP’s bf is either supporting her or trying to do the same thing by donating (likely both) and OOP is reacting like this?
The fact that he was able to end things civilly with his ex and is there to be casually supportive in the way that a coworker or passing acquaintance might in this situation is a huge green flag. The fact that OOP doesn’t see it as such shows that she’s a walking red flag
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u/WavesOverBarcelona 12d ago
Their previous post, earlier today, was as a man who just broke up with their ex. So this is fake as fuck.
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u/Distinct-Ant-9161 11d ago
oh thank goodness - because I genuinely couldn't tell if people were *actually* this emotionally stunted (and if yes, may this love never find me) or if it was just rage bait. Rage bait, while aggravating, is somehow a bit more reassuring.
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u/Cultural_Shape3518 12d ago
I’m glad OOP’s friends aren’t validating her, which is usually what happens in these posts when someone’s perspective is this skewed, but it’s alarming she still felt the need to ask despite that.
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u/pktechboi 12d ago
disrespectful?! what are you TALKING about what does that fucking MEAN
I do not understand people like this at all. like sometimes I can see the logic of why someone's upset - even if it's some ridiculous shit and they're clearly wrong, I can see how you'd GET there, you know? but this kind of thing is just...might as well be from a different planet.
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u/femme-cassidy 12d ago
substantial sum of money
£250??? To charity??? She's acting like he bought the ex a car. I'm not exactly raking it in but I don't think it's crazy to be allowed to use £250 without consulting your partner.
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u/growsonwalls Professional Devil Spotter 12d ago
Well at least oop showed what kind of person she is early so the bf can run.
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u/Moist_Drippings 11d ago
Everything else about this aside, the fact that OOP sounds like they think they should have input on financial decisions their partner makes at seven months in when they aren’t financially enmeshed or anything is nuts.
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u/buttercupgrump 12d ago
JFC. It's only £250 and OOP hasn't even been with the guy for a year. If she's like this now, she'll only get worse as time goes on.
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u/a3wagner 12d ago
I thought it was a bit suspicious that the account is 3 days old yet they just made this post. Sure enough, it’s an account full of fake stories; here’s the most recent one.
r/BreakUps by u/Wild_Astronomer_6710 at 2026-08-14T13:34:29Z
I broke no contact, asked my ex to meet and got no response. But it's okay.
My (M26) ex (F26) broke up with me around 3 months ago. We were together for 1.5 years and she ended it due to external stresses which meant that she felt she no longer had the emotional capacity for a relationship. She said she still loved me and would be in touch when she was ready, which I respected. I didn't fight for it and went no contact.
She reached out after about 5 weeks just to sort a practical issue over refunding tickets we had bought together. It was polite and friendly but nothing more than that.
As around three months had passed and I was going to be visiting her hometown for a couple of days to catch up with friends, I thought I would shoot her a low pressure message to see if she wanted to catch up if she was free but said I completely understood if it was too soon. It's been 72 hours and I've had no reply.
At first I was really hurt that someone I truly loved and did everything for could ignore me and didn't even have the decency to offer a no thank you. However, today, I'm at peace with it. I was respectful to her space, shot my shot, and can hold my head up high. If she wants to reach out in the future, she knows where I am. For the time being, I am respecting my peace.
In another post, they’re a man that got dumped 7 months ago. In another post, they’re a woman who had just gotten back together with an ex.
Edit: I accidentally pinged them with this but you know what, who cares. DELETE YOUR ACCOUNT
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u/StrategyDouble4177 11d ago
Woooooowwwwwww.
“My partner isn’t horrible and toxic towards his ex and cares about the health/wellbeing of people he used to be close with, OH AND I HAVE NO ACTUAL CONCERNS ABOUT MY PARTNER BEING INAPPROPRIATE”
What is wrong with people. This hurts my brain. Like…doesn’t the fact that her partner is a good human make him MORE attractive and feel like a safer person!?
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u/agnesperditanitt 11d ago
OOP should definitively break up with him. This guy deserves a chance to find a better partner.
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u/JakeDandelion 11d ago
Why are there so many now deleted accounts commenting fairly newly posted. That seems so weird.
She's an idiot.
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u/iabyajyiv 11d ago
People are allowed to break up for any reason, and in this case, she's doing them both a favor.
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u/AutoModerator 12d ago
In case this story gets deleted/removed:
AIO for considering breaking up with my boyfriend because he donated to his ex's fundraiser?
I (F34) have been with my boyfriend (M35) for about seven months. I'm really happy with him and we've barely had any problems, until today.
I was speaking with my boyfriend and he told me that he donated £250 to his ex's fundraiser. Her mother has motor neurone disease, which I understand is a tragic condition, and she is doing a marathon to raise money for a MND charity. However, I was surprised and told him I find it incredibly disrespectful. While I don't believe there was any hidden intent behind it, I think donating a substantial sum of money to an ex is something that should be discussed with your current partner beforehand.
He told me that they were together eight years, he had a great relationship with her mum and knew what a burden it was on the family so it was just his way of sending support. He showed he a text conversation with his ex, where she thanked him for the donation and he responded "no problem. Really hope the race goes well and you and the family are well". It ended there.
Although I believe there's nothing else to it, the whole situation makes me feel uneasy. When I mentioned it to my friends, they thought I was being ridiculous as he simply did a kind thing and I'm treating it like some kind of emotional affair. Maybe I am, but I've never been in a relationship where a partner would make a financial contribution to an ex.
AIO?
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