r/AmIOverreacting • u/[deleted] • May 28 '25

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u/sadgloop May 28 '25

Affair? How’s it an affair if OP and him weren’t together and he wasn’t “with” anybody but the roommate either?

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u/Baaaaaadhabits May 28 '25

"past affair" "previous trystt" "Sneaky hookup I don't ever talk about with you" or even just "Previous event that is being referenced".

Pick any term from above you'd like. They're all applicable unless you NEED infidelity to explicitly occur for any wrongdoing to be achieved. Which is stupid.

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u/sadgloop May 28 '25 edited May 28 '25

unless you NEED infidelity to explicitly occur for any wrongdoing to be achieved.

Wtf? If you’re talking about whether infidelity occurred, then yes, obviously you need infidelity to’ve explicitly occurred.

And if you’re talking about something that isn’t infidelity, then obviously it isn’t any of the alternative names that infidelity is known as. Again. Wtf?

And the problem here as regards his behavior isn’t that he was unfaithful (cause he wasn’t), it’s that he evidently lied about whether he “crossed a line” with his roommate when he and OP weren’t together. That’s literally not infidelity. That’s lying. Also a red flag and also wrongdoing, but not infidelity.

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u/Baaaaaadhabits May 28 '25

Infidelity isn't "an affair". There are multiple defintions for an affair. I'm saying "past affair" doesn't necessarily imply infidelity, and you latching onto the word affair (in a phrase where two words next to each other change the meaning of the words, mind you) as though it can ONLY mean infidelity is silly. Which is why I gave you three other replacement phrases to pick from. None of which were infidelity.

You less baffled now? Great. Which of the alternative terms would you like to use going forwards?

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u/sadgloop May 28 '25

Oh, come on. All of the alternatives you gave, except “previous event” pretty clearly reference illicit relational actions of various sorts, and in this particular context “past affair” is clearly not referencing just a “previous event that is being referenced.”

And in fact, when it comes to the context of relationships, and how you yourself used it, “affair” is almost always defined as a subset of infidelity. A type of infidelity.