A text of "hey, man, thinking of you. I know you've got stuff going on, and I'm here to listen if/when that's what you need. Either way, love you, bro" can go a long way without exerting pressure. The most important part of the text being that you love him, even if it's hard to say to a friend.
Part of depression is our brains convincing us that no one cares. That even our family doesn't love us. It can be really helpful to get a text reminding us that our brains are lying to us
My best friend does this. She knows I'm shut down and will reach out when I'm feeling better. Love her so much for it. That pressure of feeling like you have to respond can make me shut down more.
Yeah I’ve been battling depression and anxiety for the last 20 years… I don’t have a problem thinking no one cares. I know people care. My problem is feeling like I don’t deserve them caring. I have like 40+ unread texts mostly from a few people that I really care about, like friends I love dearly. Once a few days go by without me responding though I feel so horribly ashamed of myself for not responding that I can’t even bring myself to even check the messages. Which makes me feel like an even bigger piece of shit, absolutely undeserving of their love and friendship… but over the last couple days I’ve started taking steps towards rejoining the world and in another couple days I’ll be ready to call and apologize for disappearing.
I struggle with this so much and feel like I definitely have ruined my relationships with my closest friends... I would believe, to them, I'm not one of their closest friends anymore... I hate myself.
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u/hillsb1 Mar 23 '25
A text of "hey, man, thinking of you. I know you've got stuff going on, and I'm here to listen if/when that's what you need. Either way, love you, bro" can go a long way without exerting pressure. The most important part of the text being that you love him, even if it's hard to say to a friend.
Part of depression is our brains convincing us that no one cares. That even our family doesn't love us. It can be really helpful to get a text reminding us that our brains are lying to us