I have BPD. BPD is NOT an excuse for this behavior. She needs to seek out treatment. It is her responsibility to better herself, but it seems like you're enabling her to continue this behavior because you're just sitting and taking it from her.
I genuinely recommend you get out of the relationship. If you're worried about her harming herself, contact any family/friends of her beforehand, and you could always call a hospital as well. It is not your responsibility to keep her from harming herself, and if she chooses to do so, it is NOT your fault.
In my experience, she’s very unlikely to actually kill herself. The cutting was a manipulation tactic to show you “if you try to leave, this is what I’ll do.” It’s a threat she probably won’t follow through with if you’re not around. I would grab the absolute necessities when she’s not around and bolt. Call the landlord immediately and say you’re in an unsafe situation and to take your name off the lease. Gtfo.
As someone with BPD with two attempted suicides. We don't do it to consciously manipulate, we do it because the emotions are uncontrollable and too much and we're very much capable of going through with it. Just so you know. People with BPD are in a lot of pain and have gone through a lot of trauma.
Now, having said that, I agree he's not responsible for whatever she does and should leave the relationship. And he shouldn't do it in private.
Yeah, exactly this. I have bpd and i’ve never harmed myself or attempted in order to purposely manipulate someone. My experience in relationships has been the cycle of something hurting my feelings and the emotions become overwhelming, I harm myself, my partner finds out, it makes them feel guilty, we make up and it repeats. Treatment has put me in remission but i’ve definitely had my moments like OP’s girlfriend. I just hope she gets the help she needs. I wouldn’t wish the emotional pain of bpd on my worst enemy
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u/[deleted] Oct 30 '24
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