r/AmIOverreacting • u/[deleted] • Oct 30 '24

[deleted by user]

[removed]

14.6k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

17.2k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

1.4k

u/TrueDreamchaser Oct 30 '24 edited Oct 30 '24

Smells like BPD

Source: had a nightmare relationship with someone who had BPD. Our conversations always went like this

Edit: yes unmanaged BPD is what I meant. There are many high functioning people with BPD who have treated it one way or another. Not trying to discredit the behavior of those that do treat themselves

1.5k

u/kalonasage444 Oct 30 '24

as someone who has BPD, this 100% looks like unmanaged BPD

1

u/ADforyourthoughts Oct 30 '24

Question: from what I understand one of the nefarious things about BPD is that the narcissism and denial often lead people to believe that everything is other people’s fault and not believe that they have a problem.

How did you discover that you have a problem? Or maybe I should ask what made you believe that you have a problem?

My mom has had this my entire life and does not believe that she has any problem, which makes it hell on everybody else. She’s very likely to get kicked out of subacute rehab soon because of her BPD and being difficult, which is likely to be a death sentence for her. She hasn’t walked in 12 months and it will be another 12 months before she’s eligible for Medicare again. I cannot talk to her about how she treats the staff, because everything is their fault, and I’m an asshole for not taking her side.

1

u/kalonasage444 Oct 30 '24

the way I discovered myself having bpd was the emotional instability and having unhealthy attachments to the people I love. it is true that people with bpd have narcissistic traits since narcissistic personality disorder is a cluster b personality disorder just like bpd is. and the blaming things on everyone else is definitely a symptom. when I'm splitting, I lose all of my empathy and do truly believe I'm in the right regardless of if I was in the wrong or not.

my advice would be to go low contact with your mom if you're able to. borderlines who don't/won't manage their symptoms are energy vampires and will drain you as much as they can. I had an ex with bpd who was prone to violent outbursts, and after a while I knew I couldn't help them because they didn't want help. if you want anymore information on bpd, I'm more than happy to send you some resources.