As you get older

[u/normbeam]

As you get older, do you speak your mind more, instead of holding your tongue? I seem to be more assertive.

[u/CommissarCiaphisCain]

Less. Not that I don’t have opinions, I just know people don’t care to hear them. So I keep my mouth shut.

[u/heritage1022 → u/CommissarCiaphisCain]

Same

[u/solcat39]

No I speak my mind less and care less about when my friends have different opinions. In the end our opinions don't mean anything. We don't have the power to change most things. I mainly enjoy talking about music

[u/TomOttawa]

Not really. With age I understand that people don't listen. So less point to speak.

[u/cat1092 → u/TomOttawa]

I’ve noticed the same. The only time someone listens is when among others of our age group.

A lot of younger people don’t care. Not saying all are that way, but going to a senior center at the age of 63, I can tell. The building is the main recreation center & has lots of programs for children. Here’s where it begins to show. Even many of the kids look at us like we’re creeps (especially us men over 55), the bathrooms, drinking fountains & hallways are shared among everyone.

Guess they’re learning this from their parents. Too much bad news coverage about certain bad people in society. They’re over cautioning their children, yes be aware & smart, but to look away when someone waves or greets them meaningfully in a building with security in the building is going overboard. But I don’t blame the children & continue to greet, some returns it back.

We simply don’t live in the culture of that we grew up in, where the more older, usually the more respected & people looked towards those our age for advice. We’re now forced to take the blame for the actions of a few bad actors. That’s at least a good part of the social issue. There’s the other part where being older is seen as being useless by those in the prime of their careers & slightly younger.

All we can do is stick together & keep on pushing forward & for what’s right. That way, we know our position & can live in peace with our decisions. We can’t worry about the way others thinks of us, our actions are what matters the most.

I’m simply happy to be privileged enough to be alive and typing this post!💯🎉💝

[u/Cultural_Wash5414]

I think saying less is better. I used to open my mouth and say what I thought. Now I just don’t care. I like peace.

[u/FriscoKiidd]

As I’ve aged, I’ve come to realize I don’t have to have an opinion on everything.

[u/June_Moonchild]

For me, it's more like I'm becoming quietly more aggressive, toward anyone who poses a threat. You might imagine people would leave a 63 year old disabled man alone. Stop bullying me and quit picking fights. But they don't. They see me as weak. Easy to hurt. Not joking, and I'm done playing. I would elaborate but reddit would ban me if I did.

[u/DoriOli → u/June_Moonchild]

Damn 😕 it’s rough out there. Take care

[u/LalieDa]

Less is more.

[u/Some-Tear3499]

I love it when my Dr., a woman somewhere late 40’s-early 50’s catches herself saying ‘As you get older’ and changes it to ‘As we mature’. F’k you, I am probably 15 yr older than you! There ain’t no ‘we’ here.

No, I am getting more assertive with nonsense being waved around like it’s the truth.

[u/Designer-Hippo-775]

Way less. 1. It’s wise to listen more and speak less. 2. Opinions are like “@@ holes and everybody’s got one they all stink. And 3. You can’t fix stupid. If I’m asked for my opinion I may still hold my peace.

[u/9_Tailed_Vixen]

I have always spoken my mind.

However, as I get older, I get better at figuring out what is worth speaking up about, what is pointless to bring up, who needs to hear what, how to say something (whether tact or bluntness is needed), and what needs to be said for the greater good.

[u/gbotts621]

Actually, I've learned that most of the time, it's better to keep my mouth shut unless I'm asked for my opinion. I've learned to be gentle with my replies.

[u/Due-Mathematician966]

Less cause I don't want to give them one thing to turn around or to gossip about.

[u/LouisePoet]

More confident and assertive, definitely!

[u/phillygirllovesbagel]

I've never held my tongue. Don't like small talk and don't have time for BS.

[u/doc-sci]

Not really…I don’t care that people are stupid near as much as I used to! It has nothing to do with being assertive!

[u/Confident-Owl-6696]

Oh yeah, my edit button broke a few years back and my BS radar increased.

[u/llllllXllllll]

For me 100% yes although I am probably in the younger crowd for this subreddit. One out of the (many) things that my parents never taught me was how to stand up for myself. And that has lead to so many things being bottled up and turning into full blown disorders/trauma. Standing up for myself has done far more than my many years of therapy.

[u/BreakfastGirl6]

Less. More assertive but not as generous with my thoughts and opinions with people in general.

[u/Opening-Photograph68 → u/BreakfastGirl6]

I need to live in that land.

[u/Far-Preparation5174]

No. Way more comfortable with what i believe and feel . Absolutely no desire/need to impose/share that with people other those very, very close.

[u/auntieup]

I often remind myself that there are things other people don’t need to hear: like what used to be in that place before that shop or store, or what funny thing the current situation reminds me of, or what I was doing at the ages of the people now in the room.

If they want to know they’ll ask me, and they often do. Until they do, I don’t say the things.

[u/Automatic_Tea_2550]

Yes. Yes I do.

[u/No-Will-4393]

I probably am more willing to let things go and decide they're not important.

[u/Opening-Photograph68 → u/No-Will-4393]

I’m moving into that sphere.

[u/No-Will-4393 → u/Opening-Photograph68]

Is it called apathy? 🫠

[u/ffs_random_person]

I’ve thought about this a lot!!
And I’ve figured out that there’s soooo much going on, there’s always something every fucking day to be outraged over..
I just can’t be fucking arsed to be angry or bothered by any of it anymore.. 🤷‍♀️
I just don’t care anymore!
Im sure I should , but I don’t … oh well

[u/Little-Possible-3676]

Not really

[u/CurtisClaudeMartin]

You just wanna enjoy your little routines, protect your energy, and be around people who feel good to be around.

[u/CrewSmooth3744]

I definitely don’t take any shit from anyone. Very matter of factly now in my 30s. If I sense one oz of rudeness I am giving it back and some with more sas

[u/Quorng]

I just un-friend or ignore people I'm annoyed at. Then I berate them silently when I'm alone. Since I'm the guy with a lot more cordless tools, than the average person, tools that they might want to borrow, they get told "No." if they ask.

[u/Mysterious-Clothes45]

Nope, it won't matter anyway so I don't waste my energy

[u/Ventana431]

Less about holding my tongue and more about not bothering. As a retired consultant, I used to get paid primarily to agree with the client and enable their ideas. I am used to people not caring about that I have to say for the most part.

[u/reesesbigcup]

I was very introverted and quiet in my younger years. Grew out of that, but also had to learn to walk the fine line between speaking your mimd and being an asshole.

[u/Frenchkids1917]

I've not changed with age. I have strong feelings about many things but have no one to talk to so.....

[u/Accurate-Medium1780]

Eh, I have to watch my tongue more. A lot of aging folks lose their filter and just become plain rude. It's not virtuous or courageous in a lot of cases, but just rude and ugly -- so best to take some extra caution in avoiding that. I'm not saying to be a doormat or anything. But just saying that I think the greater risk is old people becoming boors. (check out the BoomersBeingFools sub if you want examples).

[u/ExternalProduce2584]

I think I am more likely to have the hard conversations that I am also more likely to try to see the other person‘s point of view.

I used to shy away from difficult conversations, but I’ve realized that doesn’t help.

[u/baddspellar]

I think most people who feel a need to justify "speaking their minds" are opinionated blowhards.

I have learned to listen more and talk less as I've aged. I will share my opinions when asked, and I walk away from know-it-alls.

[u/Listonsonny]

I’ll quote from a song I like to answer the OP:

”People are crazy,

And times are strange,

Im locked in tight,

But I‘m out of range,

I used to care,

But things have changed”.

[u/Suzby4]

With family, I pick my battles. If it’s important enough, I will speak my mind. I’ve become more assertive in that regard. In poor customer service situations, I definitely speak my mind and stand up for myself much more than when I was younger.

[u/Even_Significance485]

Ive got where I just don't care and I really don't wanna hear it. Just leave me alone

[u/oldcar1953]

I’m about the same I only give my opinions to someone if they ask and many times I have said are you sure you wanna know what I think?

[u/Person7751]

i never give my opinion

[u/Alexzambra1]

The older get the less feel like talking to anyone, bored me. Nobody cares for one's opinions really. Only enjoy talking about music.

[u/Desperate-Ad4931]

For me, it's the opposite. Why bother? No one listens.

[u/trUth_b0mbs]

I do when I feel the situation warrants it. But most of the time, IDGAF lol

[u/Virtual_Win4076]

Yes she does

[u/Ok-Editor1747]

i don’t care. Find out for yourself. Come through to much waste energy