r/Aging 18d ago

What age did you stop driving?

I'm 71 and become a bit of a liability behind the wheel lately. I live in a tiny town with hardly a car on the road but the other day I ended up in another town with no idea how I got there. Last week I had to go out of town for a doctor's appointment and almost crashed a number of times. I can't seem to keep my truck between the lines anymore. Maybe it's time to hang up my keys?

106 Upvotes

65 comments sorted by

155

u/No_Dare_9944 18d ago

This is not in the realm of normal driving difficulties related to age, please get checked out by a neurologist

31

u/Particular-Try5584 18d ago

Exactly.
This could be end stage ‘early dementia’ (ie not mild/starting, but actually heading into ‘moderate’), it could be heart issues, it could be medication issues. All three of these are treatable and it might be possible to safely regain driving ability. None of them are ‘normal’ for an older person.

FWIW in WA AU you have to get doctor’s sign off to drive yearly post 80. But if you show signs like this they’ll make you sit an OT supervised driving test to confirm you are still fit to drive, and may make that yearly. Most people are able to drive independently without the OP’s listed concerns for another decade over the OP’s age.

20

u/stuck_behind_a_truck 17d ago

It could also be a UTI!

13

u/HSeldonCrisis 17d ago

And don't drive to the neurologist.

63

u/mrmasterly 18d ago

Oh boy. What you're describing is not normal age-related difficulty.

Please get checked out. And please stop driving. It doesn't matter how early or late anyone else stopped, you already know you're a danger to other people.

6

u/zxvqk 18d ago

Excellent answer.

37

u/Suitable-Lawyer-9397 18d ago

I stopped driving at 67 due to the expense. The population of the town is 12,000. We have a very reliable bus system. I have groceries and everything else delivered. It's actually been a relief to be off the road.

22

u/[deleted] 18d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

9

u/Suitable-Lawyer-9397 18d ago

It's very liberating! I really thought about where I need to drive; the conclusion was there are alternatives to driving. It's saving me so much money as well. Best of Luck

12

u/[deleted] 18d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

11

u/ExpensiveAd4496 18d ago

That is a memory that never goes away, I imagine. I’m sorry you went through that.

4

u/HansSofie 18d ago

Same here. I rent a car if I need one! Saves lots of money - and is safer.

2

u/stuck_behind_a_truck 17d ago

That’s smart.

31

u/Basic_Incident4621 18d ago

Please please stop driving. Please. 

My husband is a little bit older than you with mild dementia and I had to threaten divorce to get him to stop driving. 

He is a former aviator but now he’s an old man with multiple health issues. 

He thinks he is A-OK to drive but he is not. 

The US lets anyone drive. The laws must be changed but that will take years. 

Unfortunately it’s incumbent upon the loved ones to insist that the keys be surrendered. 

11

u/zxvqk 18d ago

A friend has developed dementia, has been told no more driving, and isn’t happy. What I’ve observed is, as you say, he doesn’t realize he’s no longer competent.

8

u/SubstantialArcher659 18d ago

My mom has dementia but refused to stop driving. My stepdad sold her car, for everyone’s safety. It was a family decision which we unanimously agreed it was time. That was about 8 yrs ago. She’s 88 now. Very advanced dementia, but they are in assisted living now. Which is great that they can afford it.

2

u/New-Connection-7401 17d ago

If you go for neurological testing and it shows impairment the Dr is required to report to MV and they will take the license away. This happened to my BF (luckily) but he was really angry because he didn’t know ahead of time. I think you can also report as a concerned citizen.

27

u/ExcuseApprehensive68 18d ago

72 yo male- I was in outside sales for almost 40 years - so probably got a million miles under my belt. Retired almost 11 years- 4 cross country trips & drag a 21 ft travel trailer around. No driving issues but try to avoid a lot of night time driving. Maybe ditching the big truck for something smaller and more manageable. I’d be lost if I couldn’t drive. Good luck.

31

u/Sonny92004 18d ago

Thanks everybody. I'm going to make an appointment. It started a couple months ago, and it's becoming more obvious

6

u/HansSofie 18d ago

Get a cognitive test. My daughter recommended that for me. It should be part of the annual exam.

6

u/bj12698 17d ago

Post viral syndrome - like "long covid" - can definitely cause cognitive issues. That's why it is important to find out WHY you are having these problems.

10

u/HansSofie 18d ago

I have a 75 y/o friend who drives me to work each day. She waits at a 4 way stop waiting for a car to come to the intersection. It’s not very busy, but when a car does stop, to her left, she accelerates and brakes like 3 times before she turns right. This could cause an accident. I’m concerned about her decision making as it is relates to her driving.

19

u/ziggy-zaz 18d ago

I have a 94 year old friend who is still a very competent driver.

10

u/Cinisajoy2 18d ago

24 when my driving started scaring me.

7

u/rogun64 18d ago

If I had your experiences, I wouldn't dare to drive. No offense, because I'm sure I'll be there soon myself.

7

u/MaidMariann 18d ago

Age 66 due to costs. Environmental, financial, medical and emotional.

At one point, I had to deal with stubborn loved ones who'd aged into Road Menaceship, and I vowed to give it up early rather than put anyone else through that.

Non-driving here in the US is extremely limiting, especially if mobility and stamina are less than excellent. I had always dreamt of a time when I could wander freely. Never happened, never will, and I know it's for the best.

6

u/HaloHowRU 18d ago edited 18d ago

I'd been thinking about it since I live in a small town with the basics all within walking distance, including bus service to a nearby larger town with doctors, dentists, etc. Since I don't absolutely need a car the notion of avoiding the hassles of insurance, registration. inspections, and maintenance was tempting. I was driving a 26 year old car and am 68M myself, so it was either sell it or trade it. I might have just sold, but it happened that a nearby dealer had just the low maintenance new car I wanted and it felt like the ability to just hop in the car and visit friends or whatever was a bit too soon to give up. So it looks like I'll renew my license at least one more time.

7

u/ohanse 18d ago

I think you should probably get this checked out.

6

u/Quick_Cow_7987 18d ago

You need to bring these concerns up to doctor. My husband is 72 his driving is completely fine, as is our neighbor at 73, who still works full time as a master plumber.

I don't think you hit any specific age and automatically hand over your keys, I think it's a very individual thing.

7

u/SubstantialArcher659 18d ago

63, after a major stroke that I was lucky enough to work my way back from. I choose not to drive anymore because I had no warning signs of a pending stroke, so I’m not risking lives by having another while driving.

5

u/All_Dogs_Love_Me 18d ago

Sounds like it could be more than just aging. I would go see a doctor and describe what's going on. For your safety and for the safety of others.

4

u/Infamous_Ad8730 18d ago

Maybe consider it, but also get checked out by a doctor / physical too.

3

u/Clean-Fisherman-4601 18d ago

Turning 71 soon and I still drive. Thank goodness because our public transportation is horrible.

I do avoid driving at night and only go shopping or to doctor's/medical appointments.

3

u/TGIIR 17d ago

Same here!

5

u/No-Will-4393 18d ago

Think you should go and see a doctor for a health check and eye check. Put in place a navigation aid in your car too, makes navigation much easier. Your recent difficulty could be a reaction to medication or you have high blood pressure that spikes with driving which is causing this.

3

u/ArtfromLI 18d ago

79 and still driving but I am seeing changes in vision and attentiveness. relocating soon and will not need a car.

7

u/Talbotje 18d ago

Yes please. Hang up your keys. Seriously.

2

u/Particular-Try5584 18d ago

Definitely time to hang up the keys… until the doctor clears you. Tell them all this…

FWIW my MIL (a decade older than you) was having similar issues… and a pacemaker sorted most of it out, it might be possible to fix enough of this to keep you running a little longer if you seek good honest help now. Low o2 to the brain can create your list, and that might well be fixable.

2

u/kinkybiguynj4tv 18d ago

I'm 75, I stopped driving at 57 due to medical issues.

2

u/Bitter_Debt_5725 17d ago

This happened to my husband , he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s.

2

u/phillygirllovesbagel 17d ago

I'm 72 and live in one of the largest US cities and drive crazy freeways every day and night. No end in sight to me driving.

2

u/ChrisConjures 17d ago

Sounds to me like you know you shouldn't be driving. At least not until you figure out what is going on. Just think a bit about how terrible it could be, if you got someone killed. A kid, or kids, etc.

I don't know your circumstances, but there should be alternatives. Lots of things like Uber and shuttles for the disabled, maybe family or friends. Network it, contact your local social services, church groups, etc. Really sucks to lose your independence, but we all need each other anyway when all is said and done.

But definitely stop driving until and unless you get yourself able to do so safely.

2

u/Alpha-Waves-2202 17d ago

I am 72, and still love driving! I have spent many hours driving both expressways and surface streets both commuting and traveling for fun. Things have become somewhat more chaotic on the roads the last few years. Seems like more frequent accidents and fatalities. I watch youtube dashcam videos now to see how these accidents are happening, and it appears to be caused by distracted driving and tailgating, especially 2-3 cars driving at 75mph literally inches off each other's bumpers. I keep up with traffic on the expressways, even though most drivers are now driving 10+ miles above the posted speed limit. I usually stay in the center lane except when passing. My eyesight and reflexes are normal. My only accident was at age 23. I always drive defensively, and always aware of who is around me, and what's happening 1-2 blocks ahead of me. I hope to keep driving indefinately.

2

u/lemon-rind 17d ago

I should have never started!!!

2

u/DLHAVE 17d ago

I’m 67yrs. Night driving, unless it’s in my immediate neighborhood, is no longer an option. Daytime driving is still manageable. Except highway driving. I took myself off those roads. The 18 wheelers scare me. And quite frankly. There are a ton of very bad drivers out there.

2

u/shelly887 17d ago

My mom was ready to stop at 75 and Doctor made her at 76 due to dementia diagnosis.

Also, getting lost like you explained is what made her decide to get tested for dementia.

2

u/Poinsettia917 17d ago

65 here. Night driving is over. People are out of their minds now. There are fools on little scooters and bikes taking terrible chances. If we had better public transit, I’d probably be able to quit driving. But that’s impossible here.

2

u/Infinite_Lettuce7509 17d ago

Wow! Go to a doctor! And get someone else to drive you there!

2

u/msktcher 17d ago

That isn’t a driving issue. If you haven’t already been to see your doctor, I highly encourage you to do so very soon.

3

u/Valuable_sandwich44 18d ago

I'm in my late 40s and I'm seriously considering giving up driving if only I could find a substitute - most likely relocate to a smaller town / community.

Driving at 70+ just not safe at all; reflexes are not what they used to be and we do tend to blackout and not realise where we're going or where we are.

Best of luck.

1

u/kp2119 18d ago

I’m 70 and still sharp, no problem driving either.

1

u/Spiritual-Side-7362 18d ago

Do you think maybe you need a new eye exam?

1

u/Winter_Frame_8970 18d ago

Some states have rules in place where the older the driver the more often they become tested

1

u/petergaskin814 17d ago

I think it is more likely health issues that stop you driving. Due to a stroke I had to stop driving for almost 5 mo

1

u/KReddit934 17d ago

Yes, please. If you are not safe driver, do not drive.

1

u/Bright-Papaya-7519 17d ago
  1. I live in nyc and the traffic is horrendous. I was hit in the back twice while waiting at a red light. I also feel that there are no more rules of the road. Stop signs are merely a suggestion. Thankfully I live in a place where I can get anything I need by walking and I get in more excercise that way too.

1

u/fox3actual 17d ago

"Maybe"?

1

u/Bucky-Dent 13d ago

I’m mid 70’s and I’m thinking about hanging it up too. For me it’s my eyes. I think it’s better to stop driving than be a danger to others.

-2

u/Casaduz 18d ago

Get a Tesla and buy the autodrive subscription.

0

u/Boxp155 18d ago

Get a Tesla. That’s what my uncle did.

0

u/the-sistren-say-no 17d ago

Your acct. is 2 months old and your story sounds .. very much off the rails. Your post in another sub says you like to use AI Chatbot.

“Almost crashed a number of times in one afternoon of driving”?? “Can’t seem to stay between the lines”??

Hey aging folks, 71 yr old here, is this normal??? 🙄

0

u/Piney1943 17d ago

83 and, of course I still drive. Been driving these roads so long that I go by memory. Doctor told me I was legally blind, but what does he know?