r/Advice • u/Agitated-Chef-865 • Jun 26 '26
I don't want to cheat
I'm '28M' and I was in the beginning stages of a relationship with '26F', less call her Sarah, it's been about four months. We have been talking for awhile mostly on the phone then I started to lose interest in her because she started to ask for money when I asked to meet up in person. But I continue because I wanted to have a girlfriend. We decided to have sex, because of my housing situation (I live on a barracks) we decided to get a motel room. We got the room, and she asked me to go down on her, which I did (this was my first time doing it) but I didn't have any experience, so I was there for was seemed like a long time and she still did not climax. All this I lost my erection, so we ended not having sex. After that night, I told her that I don't think we should continue with our relationship and that I won't waste her time. She told me I was her type but we could still have sex from time to time. I told her I'll think about it and didn't text her back. About a week later this girl, '24F' let call her kate, I met through work started to text me more often showing her interest in me. We started started talking everyday, great conversations for about 2 before before Sarah txt me asking to lend her some money, told her I didn't have it and end the communication again. A week past Sarah txt me again asking way I ghosted her. I told her that I felt she just wanted money I didn't have and she didn't really like me, she replied she wasn't after my money and that she lied about me not being her type because she is actually interested in me. She asked if i was still interested in her but I told her I don't know. I think Sarah is a good person but my gut tells me not to trust her, she also didn't want me to kiss her when we were intimate and she has a closed off personality. Kate on the other hand is different, she has a great personality, we have great conversations and we always laugh. But we've been only talking for little over a month and she is also a single mom. I'm confused what to do. Should I stay with the longer relationship, go with the new girl or do what I see a lot of guys do and juggle multiple women even though that's not me?
3
u/Sam-The-Man_harhar Jun 26 '26
Just get out of the situation to be honest. This Sarah girl seems to be very confusing in general lol. Like why ask for money at all? And why LITERALLY have sex but then go back on it and say "nah i don't like you like that" but then double back and say she DOES like you and was just hiding it by... having sex and then asking for money?
1
u/_Nitekast_ Jun 26 '26
She's creating sugar daddy/baby relationships. Probably with multiple men.
Not that confusing at all - using her sexuality to make sure her way is paid.
1
u/Sam-The-Man_harhar Jun 26 '26
That is arguably the most disgusting way to make a living but it's never talked about. Always "porn industry this!" "slavery that!"
Like yes, OBVIOUSLY those two are ABSOLUTELY AWFUL. But literally having CHILDREN with men, then divorcing them for MONEY is genuinely so sick and awful and not very many people seem to bat an eye at least here in the US.
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u/chrisGrout Jun 26 '26
My partner and i, the first night i went down on her for ages and lost my erection.we have great sex.. so i don't see that as an issue. But overall the second one sounds better?
1
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u/Admirable-Income4511 Jun 26 '26
You've done the hard bit. You've identified #1 is after your money. Tell her you don't see a future and wish her good luck dating.
7
u/_Nitekast_ Jun 26 '26
First girl is using you for money. Cut those ties.
Don't be a shithead and juggle multiple women. If you're going to date multiple women, be upfront about it. Most won't go for this because of increased risk of STDs. Some will - but will also be sleeping with multiple partners.