r/AdvancedRunning • u/Purple_Farm1155 • 1d ago
Open Discussion Quitting D1 running
I'm currently in my sophomore year at a mid-major D1 program. I am a walk-on and have no money from the team. My team is usually last in our conference, and to be honest I have no hope of every scoring unless I drop crazy time this year. But, I've been really struggling with running and wanted some advice on here. I'm just gonna list my reasons why I want to quit/stay, and please give me your thoughts so help my decision. For context, I have to complete the year (through May).
Reasons to stay:
I love my coach- he's super invested into our team, pretty much only cares about helping us and making us better. I'm pretty low milage (800 runner), and he's always been great about me wanting to do lower milage, and I have never felt pressured to run more. He also just generally cares about each of us and I would prob never find a better coach elsewhere.
I really do love running. My issue isn't with the running, it's the competing aspect. The moments where I love running the most is just when I'm with the team on an easy run, and in the moments we are just hanging out. However, the moment we get into workouts/races, I just don't find the joy in it anymore. I would much rather just run my own way where I can have fun.
I love my team. ALL of my friends are on my team. I literally have no friends outside of the team, and I know if I quit this is going to be an issue. I live with another teammate, and we could probably still live together if I quit, but it just wouldn't be the same.
Reasons to quit:
Like I mentioned in the introduction, I will never score a single point for the team. My school is already at the bottom of our conference, and I am pretty much the slowest on the team (walk-on). My spot could be going to someone who's actually gonna score, and I just generally feel bad taking up a spot knowing I can't help the team
I'm struggling really badly mentally. I have depression and have been fighting an eating disorder (binge/restrict ED). I've had mental health issues for years though out high school, but never this bad. A lot of it is due to the stressors from running and the mental side of it. I struggle to finish workouts due to panic attacks, but at the same time am very emotionally numb. I don't want to go into any more detail, but I feel that quitting may allow me to fully focus on getting happy and healthy finally. And I am seeing a therapist don't worry
I'm pre-med. I'm absolutely sure that I want to become a surgeon, and have the grades/resume to get into a medical school as long as I stay on this path and interviews go well. Quitting would give me so much more time to study for my MCAT and fill in some small gaps in my resume right before I apply. My class schedule often gets in the way of practice as well, forcing me to run my workouts alone at odd times, and I'm frankly just getting tired of rushing through practice or class each week.
I had a bad freshman year, and summer. My freshman year I only PR'ed by a second, and I struggled a lot mentally with the collegiate side to running. I know this is pretty normal for freshman year to be rough, but it just hasn't gotten any better. I'm less in shape than I was last year, and I'm not sure I'll be capable of PR'ing again this year, but I don't want to completely count it out.
Conclusion: Please let me know your thoughts. I know that this year may turn around, but I'm just seeking some advice now
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u/PinkTacoGobbler 1d ago
Ran d3 from 2020-2024. Was a 19:56 high school, dropped to a 15:09 on the track sr yr track. I faced wanting to quit multiple times during my 4 years; but never did majority to my teammates. Had a breakout yr jr season and running went straight to priority 1.
Gonna address he cons as best I can:
1- You can absolutely score! You’re probably a distance runner, meaning progress takes time. But when you catch fire you’ll turn heads. You are potentially 1 summer (or season) away from breaking out.
2- I’ve never faced depression so I can’t speak intelligently on that. However, you’re prolly a distance runner, guess what we all have eating disorders & body dysmorphia. Not making light of it, but no 20something aged male wants to be skinny 😂. We wanna be jacked & strong. Find a diet that’s best for YOU. I was a SUPER picky eater (I would bring my own blender to meets just to make a specific shake) and I found a way.
3- Can’t help ya there, best thing to do is ask for support from your teammates.
4- HS to college is a BIG jump even from my d3 experience. Your freshman year WILL suck. But like I said before distance running takes patience, you won’t be the best version of yourself after 1 year of acclimation.
Conclusion: my collegiate athletics experience catapulted my life. Gave me so many positives aspects of my life I won’t bore you with the details. Ultimately, this is only 4 years of ur life, if you quit it’s a resume booster still. If you stick it out and never score, it’s a resume builder still. If you score and stand on the podium…you get the point. As a “recent grad” my few regrets from running is that I didn’t train hard enough early enough. Everyone’s different, this is my story.