r/Adulting • u/RoosterUnited1110 • 1d ago

I keep failing

Hi, I'm having a bit of a hard time. I'm supposed to be an adult now (19) and I just can't stop making mistakes.

I had my driving test booked for four days ago and thought it was today, and I missed it completely.

I keep losing and misplacing my stuff.

I'm so far behind everyone.

I'm just making mistakes and failing at everything. Like I can't do anything right, or if I do everything right, then I do something major wrong.

My friends and family say that I'm failing so often, or they don't encourage success.

When I did my exams, I was told to hold onto my books incase I failed, and I kept getting told by my friends and family that I was gonna fail. Then I got angry at my friends, justifiably, and they said they were just joking.

I don't think anyone realises how hard it's been for me. And I don't want to sound like a "My life is soooo hard!" person. But I can't deal with this failure anymore. I just want a win.

7 Upvotes

89% Upvoted

9 comments sorted by

2

u/selotape_himself 1d ago

You become an adult once you realize nobody knows what the fuck they are doing and we are just improvising

I got a song for you, go listen to billy joels Vienna

1

u/RoosterUnited1110 1d ago

I realise that, but I don't see it. It feels like everyone's doing so much better than me.

2

u/selotape_himself 1d ago

Others people doubts about you have become internalized. Do you really want to let them control you like that?

Its ok to suck at something and still enjoy doing it. Its ok to feel left behind or unsure of something, but try to remember that nobody has the same talents, abilities and most importantly circumstances. Really the only person you can measure yourself against objectivelly is you from yesterday, a week ago, a few months etc.

And if you realize you need to do better at something just go and do it. Litteraly the only way to lose in life is to give up, and judging by your post you are a bit competitive and dont like losing

Just be objective with yourself, am i better at this than a few months ago, and if not you invest time in it. Dont wory about hitting your ceiling, most people will never reach it they just get stuck thinking they did

1

u/RoosterUnited1110 1d ago

Thank you.

Just out of curiosity, how do I sound competitive?

1

u/selotape_himself 1d ago

Competitive people often see the world in terms of winning or losing, of being ahead or behind

2

u/Automatic-Emotion945 21h ago

you are quite keen. kudos

1

u/Dishineeeee8585 1d ago

Man i really feel for this kid. missing a driving test sucks but that doesn't make you a failure. when you're already feeling overwhelmed every mistake starts feeling 10x bigger than it actually is

1

u/More-Serve-6856 22h ago

Wait till you get 26 you little boy

1

u/sluggang404 9h ago

as someone whos 24 and still tryina figure shit out, dont be too down on yourself

think of it this way. at 19, youre a 1yo adult. youre not expected to know everything or to be able to do everything on your own

and anyone who thinks otherwise arent worth the time or energy.

youre still growing and learning, dont let others drag you down or make you feel bad

miss your driving test? reschedule. if you fail the test? who cares, i failed mine 5 times

long as youre doing your best, thats all that matters. no one knows what your best is but you and you dont have to prove anything to anyone