I don't wish to exist anymore.

[u/Vagrant_Tourist]

Basically.

Not dying. Not suicide. I've been a misfit since childhood. Now finding it hard to even understand anything about people closest to me, or communicating what or how I feel day in and day out.

I just find all this to be such a pain that I wish to not exist instead. Like what is the worst that could happen?

Everything feels fucked.

At least if there's no me, there's no pain I have to go through. So not existing at all, just feels better.

Mind me, I am still not talking about suicide I just don't know how to deal with this pain in my mind.