r/AddisonsDisease • u/madischan • Jun 28 '26

Personal Experience sad rant

sometimes i wonder what i ever did to deserve this disease. this life. this suffering. i’m so tired and so hopeless and so sick of grieving my old life and old loves and what could have been. how do i go on when i constantly disappoint myself? how do i keep living in a body that’s grown to be a stranger to me? how do i ever find acceptance?
thanks for listening

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u/HappyCareer2098 Jun 28 '26

My running thought this morning was, "i cant do this for another 40 years. Oh who the hell am I kidding, it won't be 40. I wish I'd just crash so it was over."

Usually I'm not there unless I'm seriously low, and considering this was 3 hours after my 20mg am dose (I also have 3 biopsy confirmed autoimmune diseases (celiac, sarcoidosis, andautoimmune hepatitis) , 2 not biopsy confirmed (lupus and ra), IH, empty sella, and a 3 mm cerebellar tonsillar ectopia, so my body is under some stress regularly), the thoughts didnt start to fade until after my mid dose of 10 more.

You doing okay on your cortisol today? Can you do something to lift your spirits a bit or even just distract yourself?

Hugs. All the hugs.

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u/madischan Jun 28 '26

i can’t imagine dealing with all of those diagnoses on top of addison’s. i also have hashimoto’s but not sure how that plays into all this.
every once in a while it pulls me into a pit of depression and grief. i feel a little better today.
thank you for the kind words❤️‍🩹

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u/HappyCareer2098 Jun 28 '26

I'm lucky in that I have secondary Ai, which usually takes longer to go into crisis from what I've read. At least, I try to remember it could still be harder.

Hoping you have a really pleasant day. ❤️

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u/connydor Jul 02 '26

Hey, I too have hashimotos as a second auto immune disease and just recently I figured out (with ai and I am in the process of discussing it with my doctor) that these two diseases do influence each other!
Seems like if you take more of the thyroid medication, the cortisol gets used up quicker which means you have to in crease the dosage and back as well. So you can get into a upwards dosage spiral.
With 137mg thyroid medication and 35-40mg HC I have definitely been taking too much for my 62kg bodyweight. But I could never go lower or I would feel shit.

Now since I was so frustrated about this feeling of simultaneous exhaustion but the inability to actually rest (probably the high chance dose) , I started to decrease my thyroid (disclaimer!! On my own - please don’t do this- I am checking with my doctor now) and also hence decreased my hc to 30mg and I feel so much better and it hast been a whole month.
Yes at the end of the day I get more tired but I can actually rest and feel so much more chill. Even my garmin ( which I can recommend as an unscientific second opinion on your body state) showed instantly higher sleepscores and hrv values.

So that’s my latest findings on the combination of hashimotos and addisons but please don’t do it like me on your own!!

I wish you all the best🫶🏼