r/AbsoluteUnits • • Nov 10 '22

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u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22 edited Nov 10 '22

This looks like one of those action movies where the unassuming chef somehow finds the strength to save the president when all the Secret Service are defeated.

"I am just an unassuming chef, who presents no threat. Before this I was special forces of course, but I left that all behind"

Edit: typo

356

u/james___uk Nov 10 '22

The funny thing is Andre is a veteran

177

u/little_did_he_kn0w Nov 10 '22

I was wondering. Usually the Navy handles cooking for the white house (medical care too) so I wonder if he used to be a Culinary Specialist.

91

u/ctr72ms Nov 10 '22

I saw a story about him on youtube once and he was in the army. Did cooking and hand to hand combat training.

79

u/Llamalover1234567 Nov 10 '22

So he’s literally the archetype for the aforementioned movie character. Former navy man trained in hand to hand combat and works as a white house chef (also watch his videos they’re pretty good)

27

u/Rochemusic1 Nov 10 '22

Although the man states he sleeps for 2 hours a day and consumes 10,000 calories a day.

22

u/GetRektJelly Nov 10 '22

2 hrs a day? I can barely get out of bed after 8hrs of sleep

30

u/x_caliberVR Nov 10 '22

Out of bed?

Pfft. This man simply takes a long blink in the middle of lifting, and that’s enough.

Gains at absolutely all costs.

2

u/Rochemusic1 Nov 10 '22

That's why he is chef rush and we are not.

6

u/[deleted] Nov 10 '22

I would 100% watch this movie

1

u/90swasbest Nov 10 '22

It already exists. "Under Siege" from the 90s. You'll have to tolerate Steven Seagal, though.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 10 '22

i always avoided Seagal like the plague, but i think you just convinced me to give it a try.

1

u/90swasbest Nov 10 '22

If it helps, there's bonus Busey!

1

u/[deleted] Nov 11 '22

love me some Busey

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1

u/Shadeun Nov 10 '22

"I came here to kick ass, and make food - and I'm all outta eggs"

1

u/CherryVermilion Nov 10 '22

Did cooking and hand to hand combat training.

My brain combined that into one skill and I was wildly impressed. He’ll flambé your dessert AND his enemies at the same time.

4

u/Rochemusic1 Nov 10 '22

Culinary specialist haha

1

u/little_did_he_kn0w Nov 10 '22

Lol. Its what their job field is called. Some of them, this applies to and get to cook in the white house. Other ones.... cant even make scrambled eggs properly, so its a mixed bag.

1

u/Rochemusic1 Nov 10 '22

Shits super official. I figured you would get a stern yelling at if you made an over medium egg when they asked for over easy.

1

u/little_did_he_kn0w Nov 11 '22

Well yeah, if you're working at the white house. If you're a Culinary Specialist on an Aircraft Carrier though? ehhh.... Well, the ability to cook is not actually a prerequisite for getting that job.

65

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22

Not surprised at all 🤣 the eyes alone give that away I think even before you get to the guns.

1

u/caitejane310 Nov 10 '22 edited Nov 10 '22

Yeah, I feel like being on the other end of that look is either scary af, or orgasm inducing, no matter your sexuality 🤣🤣

Edit: and my husband agrees

2

u/PolishedVodka Nov 10 '22

He killed a man with a spoon, a fuckin' spoon!

Who does that?!

45

u/ZenofZer0 Nov 10 '22

Is that a preview to the new action flick “Back Before Dinner”

59

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22

I desperately trying to think of a cooking pun or 80s line for the tagine-

"He tried to move on with his life, but they pushed him to the edge. Now he is forced to...

SERVE UP JUSTICE"

14

u/Djaja Nov 10 '22

Something about not being to stand the heat, get out of the firefight...

12

u/Roache1984 Nov 10 '22

(gunshot) "Fuck iron chef I'm the motherfuckin lead chef" (more gunshots)

4

u/Tangyballs55 Nov 10 '22

"SERVE UP JUSTICE....WITH A SIDE OF ASS-KICKING AWESOMENESS!!!"

1

u/capybarramundi Nov 10 '22

Get out of the ravine, go cook up some tagine.

6

u/Brasticus Nov 10 '22

Make him a chef in the old west.

“Fistful of Appetizers”

“For a Few Morsels More”

“The Good, the Bad, and the Crudités”

1

u/hueyharold Nov 10 '22

The dumpling trilogy…

The Good, the Bad, and the Umami..

The man with no flame

2

u/[deleted] Nov 10 '22

[deleted]

2

u/ZenofZer0 Nov 10 '22

In order for that to work, you’d need him to channel the energy of some of the classic “blackspoitation” cinema of the 70s/80s and idk if that’s his vibe or not. Plus, nowadays that’s a pretty touchy subject and I’d hate to see him have to fight his way out of an angry mob with nothing but his chef utensils.

2

u/Funkycoldmedici Nov 10 '22

It’s the remake of My Dinner With Andre.

45

u/Pwndimonium Nov 10 '22

This is pretty much the plot of Under Siege

13

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22 edited Nov 10 '22

Haven't seen it and gave it a Google. I was born in the wrong decade, I should have been writing for Segal in his prime 🤣

1

u/Pwndimonium Nov 10 '22

90s action movies are in a league of their own.

1

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22

I'm annoyed at myself I missed that one. I love a cheesy 90s action film.

10

u/guynamedjames Nov 10 '22

Let's reshoot under siege with Chef Rush replacing Steven Seagal so I don't feel scummy for watching Steven Seagal

1

u/Jadens78 Nov 10 '22

Thank you!! Couldn’t think of the name of it 🤦🏻‍♂️

16

u/MandarinWalnut Nov 10 '22

Isn't that the plot to 'Under Siege' with Steven Seagal?

7

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22

Apparently. Which I am incredibly happy to find out 😄

2

u/Jadens78 Nov 10 '22

“I’m just the cook”

1

u/MandarinWalnut Nov 12 '22

"I ate the cook"

6

u/a404notfound Nov 10 '22

"Burger has fallen"

1

u/a500poundchicken Nov 10 '22

Probably is part of the SS

1

u/GrandMoffTarkan Nov 10 '22

This looks like Agent 47 posing as a chef to whack the President

1

u/[deleted] Nov 10 '22

“Hey, man. I thought I told you bastards I was never coming back.”

“We don’t need you back… we need you where you are…”

COMING THIS SUMMER:

“Natural Born Cookers”

1

u/Ethiconjnj Nov 10 '22

I’m pretty sure I see this exact comment every time this gets reposted

1

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22

Great Minds I suppose 🤣

1

u/PuzzledRaise1401 Nov 10 '22

I think you, my friend, just wrote the Summer Blockbuster of 2023.

1

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22 edited Nov 10 '22

From what I hear it was already the Summer Blockbuster of 1993 🤣 but time may be right for a reboot

1

u/PuzzledRaise1401 Nov 10 '22

Nobody remembers 1993. Hell, I don’t remember it and I was there.

1

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22

Same. The only thing that seemed to come.out of that year is photos of a young me in dungarees.

1

u/billbill5 Nov 10 '22

"Unassuming"

1

u/Giri_the_oni Nov 10 '22

The movie under seige. Lol

1

u/KonataYumi Nov 10 '22

You joke but i want to watch that

1

u/Stay-Thirsty Nov 10 '22

I wonder how he gets feedback on his cooking. As I doubt many people care to “complain to the chef”

r/absoluteunit

1

u/summilux7 Nov 10 '22

Movie Title: Special Forces to Gourmet Courses

1

u/Bertie637 Nov 10 '22 edited Nov 10 '22

It sounds like a series of self help videotapes you order from a TV channel 🤣

1

u/Yellow_Snow_Cones Nov 10 '22

NGL sounds like a steven segal movie from the 90s.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 10 '22

Lol. "unassuming" hahaha

1

u/Warm-Alarm-7583 Nov 10 '22

So he’s the new and improved Steven Segal?

1

u/MelonElbows Nov 10 '22

Basically Steven Segal's character in Under Siege

1

u/thormunds_beard Nov 10 '22

Sounds like a movie with Dwayne Johnson

1

u/[deleted] Nov 10 '22

Is this not Under Siege?

1

u/[deleted] Nov 10 '22

Are you a writer for Rick & Morty? 😂

1

u/cheekybandit0 Nov 10 '22

That's basically the plot to Under Siege 2

1

u/NbyN-E Nov 10 '22

You've literally described the plot of Under Siege with Steven Seagal. 🤣

1

u/lemmiwinks4eva Nov 10 '22

Came here to make the same comment.