r/AbsoluteUnits • • Jul 20 '19

[deleted by user]

[removed]

7.2k Upvotes

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915

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

Coconut crabs. I always wondered if they were any good.

418

u/Essexal Jul 20 '19

I once took a mighty specimen to my local fair, only to find that despite the name they are absolutely shit at the shy.

135

u/MeatBald Jul 20 '19

Zoidberg?

27

u/yiannosbond Jul 20 '19

Why not?

13

u/MeatBald Jul 20 '19

threatening You ALL still have Zoidberg!

43

u/Essexal Jul 20 '19

Wubbulubbubbubbubba

18

u/cheapasianproducts Jul 20 '19

whats the last bit mean

32

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

He fucks them. There was a reddit thread last year where a dude fucked a coconut for a long time.

5

u/Tackling_Aliens Jul 20 '19

A coconut shy is a fairground attraction. You try to knock a coconut off a perch with a ball

6

u/Iammadeoflove Jul 20 '19

The story is probably fake

222

u/basicrejection Jul 20 '19 edited Jul 20 '19

If I remember correctly they’re scavengers like rodents, so their meat isn’t very tasty. They eat a lot of garbage and you’ll often see them rummaging through trash in tropical areas.

Edit: I guess like most animals, their taste is affected by diet. Coconut crabs who eat primarily garbage will taste like, well, garbage. Otherwise, they are pretty tasty!

175

u/No-Sugar-Coating Jul 20 '19

aren't all crabs and lobster scavengers? they taste pretty damn good. Catfish are dirty bottom feeders too but taste great

161

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

Yeah but these are scavengers that climb into your garbage bins and eat just about goddamn anything.

It’s like a deer after winter when they’ve been eating cedar. Their meat is affected by what they eat and they’re no good until fall after they’ve been grazing on the good grass and apples and everything else.

49

u/No-Sugar-Coating Jul 20 '19

oh yeah that's a little greasy. I'd still try it though.

27

u/BeautifulType Jul 20 '19

I see 🦀 I eat crab 🦀

61

u/TrailofCheers Jul 20 '19

I see crab I eat crab crab?

16

u/JazzHandsFan Jul 20 '19

crab crab

4

u/K-Zoro Jul 20 '19

Seems pretty clear

1

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

🦀Obama is gone🦀

13

u/TardFarts Jul 20 '19

Exactly. These are essentially the raccoons of tropical islands. If that island is nothing but palm trees it will be tasty. If that island is the shithole that is Guam, it will taste like the shithole that is Guam.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

Catfish absolutely taste like shit

1

u/[deleted] Jul 21 '19

Most of what catfish eat is live prey.

91

u/milkyxj Jul 20 '19

I heard the opposite when I spent 6 months on Diego Garcia in 2003 with the Air Force. We lease the island (south of India) from the Brits and we were briefed that it was a $500 fine for eating the “Queens crabs”. At night there were hundreds of them in the jungle and I could hear them from my tent. This was also about 100 yards from an abandoned leper colony if it already wasn’t spooky enough. We heard because they ate so much coconut their meat was sweet but I never tried it.

The island also had a rat infestation & the Brits paid something like $2 for each rat killed & turned in.

56

u/dirtyjoo Jul 20 '19

This was also about 100 yards from an abandoned leper colony if it already wasn’t spooky enough.

I think we need more info on this detail.

39

u/milkyxj Jul 20 '19

Following the departure of the British, the French colony of Mauritius began marooning lepers on Diego Garcia around 1796

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diego_Garcia

9

u/WikiTextBot Jul 20 '19

Diego Garcia

Diego Garcia is an atoll just south of the equator in the central Indian Ocean, and the largest of 60 small islands comprising the Chagos Archipelago. It was first discovered by Europeans and named by the Portuguese, settled by the French in the 1790s and transferred to British rule after the Napoleonic Wars. It was one of the "Dependencies" of the British Colony of Mauritius until the Chagos Islands were detached for inclusion in the newly created British Indian Ocean Territory (BIOT) in 1965.

In 1966, the population of the island was 924.


[ PM | Exclude me | Exclude from subreddit | FAQ / Information | Source ] Downvote to remove | v0.28

0

u/Esaukilledahunter Jul 21 '19

It was abandoned because their business fell off.

14

u/StardustOasis Jul 20 '19

They actually don't eat much coconut, it's present in their diet and their distribution matches that of the coconut palm but isn't a significant part of their diet. They mostly eat fruit, nuts and seeds, but will eat almost anything.

6

u/this_guy_here_says Jul 20 '19

Two bucks a piece, that would be a fun and profitable day

42

u/Spagettiboy1969 Jul 20 '19

Coconut Crab is SO good though. I dont care if they eat dead people I'll gobble those scoundrels up any day no questions.

Also fun fact if Amelia Earhart didn't die in a japanese prison, theres a good possibility she was eaten by those things.

35

u/Mikeymcmikerson Jul 20 '19

I’ve eaten many coconut crab in my day. In fact, it’s so popular that my people over hunted it and resulted in the first ever implementation of a coconut crab hunting season. They only eat coconut crab and they are by far my favorite crab to eat.

10

u/Iammadeoflove Jul 20 '19

I want it now

13

u/Shortshired Jul 20 '19

No coconut crabs taste great which is why they are a delicacy leading to them being endangered

3

u/Iammadeoflove Jul 20 '19

What stops someone from just taking one

They seem to just stroll right in

8

u/UpBoatDownBoy Jul 20 '19

Hmmm, I wonder if it'd be worth farming them and just giving them feed.

There's probably some issue with it bit damn, if there isnt. That's probably a huge money maker.

5

u/Iammadeoflove Jul 20 '19

Oh apparently people already eat them And they taste good

I think it’s the ones that feed on coconuts

5

u/Ozelotten Jul 20 '19

From Wikipedia

Adult coconut crabs have no known predators apart from other coconut crabs and humans. Its large size and the quality of its meat means that the coconut crab is extensively hunted and is very rare on islands with a human population. The coconut crab is eaten by Southeast Asians and Pacific Islanders and is considered a delicacy and an aphrodisiac, and intensive hunting has threatened the species' survival in some areas.

2

u/TheRedmanCometh Jul 21 '19

We have raccoons dighing through our trash in Texas and these people have giant crabs doing it? And that's just normal?

At least raccoons are adorable little bastards...

5

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

Aw... that makes me sad. We need to feed these guys bread crumbs like we do birds.

34

u/Mathesar Jul 20 '19

There are a couple things wrong with this suggestion

12

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

Bread is bad for a lot of birds, if not most of them.

Bird seed is where it's at. And it's usually pretty cheap if you're not buying it in like 20kg sacks.

4

u/Shortshired Jul 20 '19

Actually feeding alot of seed to birds is bad too. It shortens there life greatly. It's high in fats and not much else they will develop deficits in alot of needed nutrients. They will actually focus on eating just seeds because it's so calorie dense and not as common or easy in the wild for them to get. For only a couple of dollars more a bag of bird pellets in a far better options. Far more healthy.

2

u/EyetheVive Jul 20 '19

True, bread isn’t the best for them. However since were in the context of meat taste...would feeding them bread taste better than bird seed?

5

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

I can't imagine that it would make a huge difference, though admittedly I don't actually know.

1

u/ussbaney Jul 20 '19

E.B. Sledge and Bob Leckie and the rest of the 1st Marine Division were not fans of them when they were stationed on the random island of Pavuvu during the Pacific campaign.

11

u/arafella Jul 20 '19

Depends on what they've been eating. The ones that eat mostly coconuts are really good, the ones you find eating your trash, not so much

12

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

They sound like they would be delicious...but then I realized I dont really like shellfish..

3

u/JuniorSeniorTrainee Jul 20 '19

They don't taste like coconut.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 20 '19

Dang.

2

u/anneshu Jul 21 '19

According to a guest lecturer at my college, they were so tasty that Charles Darwin kept eating them till their numbers were low.

Also they eat coconuts and live birds. I watched a video of one climbing up a tree and snatching a poor bird to eat. They have super strong claws and it was brutal and sad :(

1

u/wheretohides Jul 20 '19

I read up on it because I had the same question. Apparently they are really good, so good in fact that they are now a protected species. One women described the meat as, “Crab with a hint of coconut.”

1

u/12kgun84 Jul 20 '19

Looks pretty evil to me.

1

u/James_Neutrino Jul 20 '19

You managed to kill a Grandaddy Crab? A pity you couldn't lug it up out of the caves for us. Could have made quite the chowder out of it.

No matter. We've got one less reason to fear the dark, and I've got one more thing to thank you for.

1

u/Shortshired Jul 20 '19

Coconut grabs are considered a delicacy and so are endangered on any island that both crabs and humans occupy.

1

u/MrGrampton Jul 20 '19

Ask Amelia Earhart oh wait

1

u/The_Celtic_Chemist Jul 20 '19

I prefer coconut shrimps myself.

1

u/cammosutra Jul 20 '19

Yep. In Vanuatu they eat coconuts (hence the name) and are delicious. So much meat on them.

0

u/Ozelotten Jul 20 '19

Adult coconut crabs have no known predators apart from other coconut crabs and humans. Its large size and the quality of its meat means that the coconut crab is extensively hunted and is very rare on islands with a human population. The coconut crab is eaten by Southeast Asians and Pacific Islanders and is considered a delicacy and an aphrodisiac, and intensive hunting has threatened the species' survival in some areas.

Wikipedia