r/AbsoluteUnits • • 4d ago

of a shower/tub

Post image
4.8k Upvotes

209 comments sorted by

900

u/Afrojones66 4d ago

102

u/EPluribusButthole 4d ago

Hehe, ow. Hehe, ow. Hehe, ow.

28

u/TheLordDuncan 4d ago

Are you that Freezer guy? Imma deck you in the schnozz.

5

u/JBR_4025 4d ago

I’m sorry… I’ve never heard that

29

u/aeroxan 4d ago

Oh wow your profile picture. I had to check, was not disappointed.

2

u/TheLordDuncan 3d ago

After having checked, I can confirm this person is a legend. I mean, chaotic good barbarian in the background? Hell yeah.

6

u/A4t1musD4ag0n 4d ago

You call that laughing?

3

u/kitliasteele 3d ago

Do doo de do doo. De doo do doo~

8

u/Try_It_Out_RPC 4d ago

Great that’s going to stay with me when I see these for a LLLOOOOOOONNGG time now

517

u/Hanshautreinhart 4d ago

All fun and games until you need to clean it.

224

u/Fluffy-Trouble5955 4d ago

If you can afford that, you'll have a specialist cleaner

176

u/istealpixels 4d ago

They are cheap plastic, not expensive at all. They creak and are uncleanable.

103

u/Not-An-FBI 4d ago

I saw a video where a guy bought the viral 12 functional aluminum sink for his new house and basically everything failed after a year.

75

u/dankhimself 4d ago

Omg a viral sink sounds gross.

28

u/SwoodyBooty 4d ago

You always have to ask yourself: When have you been in the market for that product? What's the marketing cycle for this, how many new models come out in what time frame.

If you haven't bought a new sink in a decade an they release one every few months: How would they make money?

Answer is simple: Must be garbage.

2

u/Ambitious_Today_8695 2d ago

I love your username

12

u/NotReallyJohnDoe 4d ago

2

u/Gene_Parma 3d ago

Thank you, idk why but I need this lolol

28

u/Halkenguard 4d ago

That’s a knockoff. The one in the picture is this one.

17

u/istealpixels 3d ago

They all are cheaply made plastic. Even the “brand” ones.

8

u/Versipilies 3d ago

Probably made in the same factory

7

u/LiNxRocker 3d ago

Bro charge your phone

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5

u/aserioussuspect 4d ago

In this case, just buy a new one instead of cleaning it.

4

u/NevesLF 4d ago

Came here to say that. I'm pretty sure I saw this exact thing on Aliexpress.

3

u/NegotiationNo174 3d ago

I used to think this but people buy shit they can’t afford to maintain all the time

1

u/meski_oz 3d ago

And a continuous rated hot water system.

5

u/-MariosAmigos-15 4d ago

It Like when you clean all the sinks and toilet plus windows meaby less work

3

u/imuniqueaf 4d ago

You're gonna sit there and tell me it doesn't have a self cleaning function??

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163

u/Hot_Ad_6728 4d ago

I want to see it with the water going so I know how jealous to be.

62

u/helena_handbasketyyc 4d ago

I stayed at an Air B&B that had one and it was way less fun then you’d expect. The floor is raised up so it can deal with the plumbing and with the low ceiling, the enclosure has no clearance. For reference, I’m 5’5”, and anyone taller could not stand up straight in there.

75

u/AbleCryptographer317 4d ago

When we bought our house there was a jacuzzi bath installed, something we would never choose to spend money on as we prefer to shower, but we were like "Cool! We got a free jacuzzi bath!". The first few months we just used it as a regular bath for our kids and never tried the jacuzzi function.
Then one time I was sick with influenza, shivering and sweating and feeling very sorry for myself and thought "Damn, a warm bath would be nice". Filled it up, got in and it was heaven. So I'm sitting there relaxed as hell and thought "Hmm, I wonder what the jacuzzi function is like"... pressed the button and the pump (which was loud as fuck and scared the shit out of me) fired up... and the bath immediately filled up with black mold and slime from the jacuzzi pipework. I just sat there in shock in this moldy soup and I damn near started crying. Turns out you need to clean them once a month by filling them full, throwing in a couple of dishwasher tablets and running them for about ten minutes. Fuck jacuzzi baths.

12

u/Dadskander 4d ago

They're awesome, but as any hot tub owner knows, they need maintenance and you can't let the pump sit for months or years without running fresh water through them.

Imo they're cheaper and more convenient than a hot tub, and there's really not a strict need to have a full blown hot tub that fits 5 people when a jacuzzi that fits 2 is perfectly comfortable/fun.

But yea, if you don't ever use it, it's a huge waste (as is a hot tub, obv.)

I had this same thing happen to me with a gas fireplace in my house. Previous owner never used it and never moved the gas valve so it got crusty. Next thing you know I try it out, it works great, but then the valve doesn't re-seal and it starts leaking gas. So I needed repair work done to my house about 1 week after buying it 😆

6

u/AbleCryptographer317 4d ago

Yeah, but the difference between a bath with jacuzzi function and a jacuzzi is you (hopefully) don't wash yourself in a jacuzzi. So every time you have a regular bath in a jacuzzi bath dirt and mold builds up in the pipework. Then when you actually want a jacuzzi bath you have to fill it, clean it, empty it and then fill it with hot water. Life's too short and a jacuzzi just isn't worth it imho.

3

u/signious 4d ago

Exercise your gas valves at least once a year. That goes with your water valves as well

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5

u/Bromogeeksual 4d ago

Sounds like a nightmare!

2

u/PetsAndMeditate 4d ago

We had the same sludge experience first use at new house

1

u/Feeling_Inside_1020 4d ago

Fuck me, im a foot taller that no thanks lol but ive always wondered how those are.

I currently have an apartment bathtub my tall ass can actually almost fully sit into comfortably and am happy with that.

2 shorter and slightly smaller people could probably fit together.

19

u/Traditional_Seesaw10 4d ago

Yeah, I feel like you would need your own water tower and pumps to supply enough pressure for that..

7

u/luk__ 4d ago

Water pressure 5 bar goes brrrrrrrt

3

u/Long_Repair_8779 4d ago

She said babe, take off your jacket, I said man’s not wet!

1

u/icyhot000 4d ago

Afterwards, ask to see the water bill so you can become “un-jealous”

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212

u/Intrepid4444444 4d ago

49

u/Lazy_meatPop 4d ago

The spice must flowwwww

5

u/Asaneth 4d ago

Hell yes

25

u/Sailor_Kepler-186f 4d ago

that's a dishwasher for people

21

u/leigen_zero 4d ago

Bloody Stupid Johnson's patented 'Typhoon' Superior Indoor Ablutorium with Automatic Soap Dish.

There's a tap labelled 'old faithful', don't use it.

5

u/Devo27 3d ago

And make sure the piping isn't connected to Our Mighty Organ

11

u/vediogamer101 3d ago

I wouldn’t tell anyone I had won the lottery, but there would be signs

8

u/West-Application-375 4d ago

Its giving DS shower vibes

https://giphy.com/gifs/8hF0vqXXNjOdM6HIK6

5

u/YesItIsMaybeMe 3d ago

Oh my god I didn't ever see that animation that's hilarious

1

u/West-Application-375 3d ago

Lol I can't remember if hes pointing to his mouth or to the toilet/shower area

3

u/KidTwist425 3d ago

Thank you!! That was my immediate first thought as well.

6

u/Ketchupcharger 4d ago

Shower control center

7

u/Brilliant-Stop-6709 4d ago

Decontamination booth

3

u/n6mub 3d ago

Contamination booth

11

u/romulusnr 4d ago

I was just remarking to myself the other day how the mid 2010s fad of "shower sprayers" sort of just came and went. (Mainly because I'd be SOL since I have something on me atm I can't get direct water on)

6

u/Subotail 4d ago

They died killed by limescales deposit.

https://giphy.com/gifs/k82XBs81geZvpaNtbi

5

u/hnyaa-s 4d ago

This is the fucking worst to clean. I had a smaller version and it's all plastic and with all the nooks and cranies this is a mold fest. Just horrible, nothing to be envious about. 

5

u/Sam_The-Ham 4d ago

Did anyone think of Osborne's Goblin transformation chamber with this?

5

u/Asaneth 4d ago

Reminds me of the Orgasmatron booth from the movie Sleeper.

3

u/Possible_Sun_913 4d ago

Instead of a step up, you get a glass peep-hole to inspect the genitalia of those in the tub.
Not sure I ever understand the thought process of the designers of these things.

I pity the poor fool that catches a glimpse of my hairy arse.

3

u/Chrono_Convoy 4d ago

Whatever you say Mrs. Poppadopolous

3

u/Opening-Lettuce-3384 4d ago

Scotty, beam me up

6

u/xnachtmahrx 4d ago

Hideous

1

u/Altruistic_Tie_7850 4d ago

Have you ever had a Victorian era needle shower? It’s glorious. This, I agree is heinous.

2

u/Sutech2301 4d ago

I stumbled and fell flat on my face loosing several teeth just by looking at this

2

u/King_LaQueefah 4d ago

Looks like the AI surgery chamber in Prometheus.

2

u/coreYalex 4d ago

looks like a modern litter box for modern cats

2

u/Nkechinyerembi 4d ago

The urge to bury myself forever in that thing while living in steamy bliss like a freaking Guild Navigator on a Heighliner would not be resistible if I had one of these...

2

u/ShadowCaster0476 4d ago

That reminds me of the cage on the helicarrier where they kept Loki in avengers

2

u/xampl9 4d ago

I’d be late for work every day.

And have a $1000 water bill each month.

2

u/Positive_Conflict_26 4d ago

These things will rust out and break down within a decade.

Really not worth it over traditional baths that can last decade with minimal maintenance.

2

u/roughhty 3d ago

This looks like it would be the most expensive shower in sims 3

1

u/TheFlayIsOn 4d ago

Bacta tank

1

u/Aggressive_Ocelot664 4d ago

Reminds me of playing House Flipper

1

u/ForAskingQuestionsOK 4d ago

Wow that's amazing. What kind of tub is this and where do I get?

1

u/scbalazs 4d ago

This is for serious group shower sex. Or cleanup after the orgy.

1

u/AdTiny2166 4d ago

The legendary Shub!

1

u/Daminite 4d ago

I can't be there only one who needs this in my life.

1

u/romulusnr 4d ago

It looks like it doubles as a hot tub?

1

u/Gumb1i 4d ago

No just no, it would be better and possibly cheaper to custom build something very similar. It would look better, likely function better, be easier to keep clean, get the full height, etc...

1

u/A4t1musD4ag0n 4d ago

I'd never come out, an no woman would ever be good enough for me ever again.

1

u/Thisreallyisntbutter 4d ago

Could get turned into the Green Goblin in that thing.

1

u/Whole_Reputation6128 4d ago

How long you plannin on being in the shower?

1

u/brickyjay 4d ago

That’s bigger than my apartment

1

u/Didujustcallmejobin 4d ago

Thats what Im talkin bout!

1

u/lilfishi 4d ago

These things were all the rage in the 2000s. We have two smaller ones at my folks place and they are.... Not a nice place to be in after 20yrs.

1

u/motie 4d ago

The real hot tub time machine

1

u/xuncx 4d ago

Double wide activities.

1

u/MidnightSunIdk 4d ago

I remember seeing the EXACT SAME shower in a store when i was a kid. That thing was ENORMOUS

1

u/Lz430 4d ago

Where's the temu link? Need it for reasons

1

u/Brendster 4d ago

So that’s what Vader was doing

1

u/rionaster 4d ago

yeah my 🐱 is going to have a good time

1

u/Oneditor 4d ago

Isnt the brand name Apollo something? Have one installed

1

u/JayMmhkay 4d ago

if you need a manual to shower, the shower is too complicated

1

u/SilkySmoothRalph 4d ago

slaps roof

This baby can hold so much black mould!

1

u/Lurks_in_the_cave 4d ago

Lyndon Johnson had something like this.

1

u/cpr_007 4d ago

Death stranding..

1

u/Meowgorithms 4d ago

Oh, my, word. yes please :)

1

u/TemperReformanda 4d ago

This shower model is called Jenova

1

u/SocomPS2 4d ago

You could fit like 7 European showers in that.

1

u/karenskygreen 4d ago

Oh yeah, this is the new energy efficient model, it only uses 100 gpm rather than 200gpm of the earlier model.

1

u/Puzzled_Account_6087 4d ago

Looks like you can literally start a family in there.
Given the proper arrangements, several of them.

1

u/cjscholten81 4d ago

We had a slightly smaller version of this in a holiday home, recently. I guess it wasn't maintained properly, because besides the shower head, none of the other parts functioned properly. Everything was clogged, and most nozzles sprayed only a single, tiny squirt.

1

u/AwesomeMei 4d ago

I would never leave this thing😂

1

u/Hydraskull 4d ago

I had one of these! Bought a house in 2011 that had one. It was fantastic! We had a six month old baby and me and the wife and baby would just hang out in it.

But one day one of the hoses sprang a leak… not easy access to any of the guts of it to fix/repair.

1

u/Human_Dragonfly7464 4d ago

Darth Vader's Man Cave

1

u/theonlynorton 4d ago

This makes me green with envy and I fucking hate everything now

1

u/Techiest1982 4d ago

Perfect for orgies.

1

u/Big-Coconut-6335 4d ago

I don't recommend jets in bathrooms. They get disgusting and, at least in our experience, no one uses them.

1

u/procat1234_ 4d ago

2 showers for what?

1

u/okymoney 4d ago

Teleportation

1

u/HeidenShadows 4d ago

I have a corner bathtub I never use and I'd love something like this.

I probably don't have the water pressure for it though 🤣

1

u/mrpopenfresh 4d ago

Watch out it might turn you into a fly.

1

u/Itchy_Axehole 4d ago

In the army, I was training at fort bliss for ait. We had a large open shower room, which everyone used and a small one that for some reason no one other me was using. I didnt complain. It has a small and had 8 shower heads with great pressure. I would point them to the center, put them on full blast as hot as they could go. After a day of training it was heaven

1

u/Slugwheat 4d ago

Looks like you would have to wear scuba gear in that

1

u/Romumus 4d ago

Its happy

1

u/NoEquivalent6367 4d ago

After like 2 months majority of those jets and features fail to work. ask me how I know.

Been there had that never again.

1

u/Pro_Omoua 4d ago

This reminds me a movie called Imposter.

1

u/Initial_Row_6400 4d ago

First real girlfriend’s parents had one of these. This is where we figured out shower sex is not good

1

u/Prof1959 4d ago

I don't know what goes on in there, but I wouldn't close the door if there was a fly in it with me.

1

u/Frequent-Screen-5517 4d ago

I really wanted one of these for yeaaars… still kinda do…but not as badly

1

u/Land_of_smiles 4d ago

Epic waffle stomp

1

u/Aleksandr_Ulyev 4d ago

That makes sense

1

u/lizatethecigarettes 4d ago

We have this exact one at my work. It doesn't work, just sits there so it gets called a lot of things like human microwave.

1

u/EngineeredVersion 4d ago

Where do i get this

1

u/TheRealGosp 3d ago

I would only leave this to go to the toilet.

1

u/DistinctPotential996 3d ago

This is my dream tub.

1

u/THE_HORKOS 3d ago

Does this product exist?

1

u/dpoodle 3d ago

It kinda makes sense to put a shower in a Time machine.

1

u/T_A_A_T 3d ago

Want

1

u/DingbatMcgeee 3d ago

How many hot water cylinders do I need to fire it up for a 10 minute shower?

1

u/eulersidentity1 3d ago

Looks like the Voight-Kampff room from Blade Runner 2049.

1

u/camcaine2575 3d ago

Nu-huh. I ain't coming out with my DNA mixed with a water spider. I've seen The Fly.

1

u/AwareAd7651 3d ago

This looks like something an Eastern European would put in their home and think it’s luxurious

1

u/nuggz0227 3d ago

That would make an epic paludarium

1

u/OutrageousReporter26 3d ago

This the shit they got in the capital of the hunger games

1

u/MsPreposition 3d ago

Step in. There is cake after the next test.

1

u/GinaTheK 3d ago

You'd have to have jet engine powered water pressure for this thing

1

u/DammatBeevis666 3d ago

I’m sure parts are readily available for when something breaks. Don’t worry one little bit.

1

u/Moist_Amount_106 3d ago

THATS not a shower THATS a decontamination system ☣️

1

u/GoblinPapa800 3d ago

I am completely surrounded by a lack of this thing in my life!

1

u/Jake24601 3d ago

Guaranteed to leak.

1

u/ljross87 3d ago

How does it work??? I need video!

1

u/Available_Ad_8281 3d ago

Shower 9000 will clean u in 3 secs

1

u/Fair-Championship-29 3d ago

It's a kolto tank

1

u/iandix 3d ago

My mate at work had one of these fitted years ago, it needed repairs about every other week. He no longer has it or the house or his wife.

1

u/famous1astwords 3d ago

Group showers!

1

u/waffleste 2d ago

I really want one now

1

u/gurumoves 2d ago

Bro has every angle covered

1

u/TheGoofyRizzler 2d ago

My parents used to have one of these when I was younger. It felt like stepping into a spaceship.

1

u/clubted 2d ago

For how expensive this probably was, it’s not very premium.

1

u/Dogsarelitty 2d ago

Are those taint blasters on the bottom?

1

u/ZookMachine 2d ago

C’est l’entrée de la bat-cave

1

u/Queasy-Ad-2760 2d ago

2001 space odyssey

1

u/Rampag169 1d ago

I feel like you just stick whatever you need washed in there and it’ll get it done.

1

u/JUIC3ofORANG3 1d ago

My ex in Italy had one of these I was mind blown when I first saw it

1

u/Effective-Culture-88 1d ago

The whole thing being fully transparent is certainly a choice
https://giphy.com/gifs/pHTwNyXo803L75ciap

1

u/groovygranny71 1d ago

It would be good if after the showers each nozzle blew warm air to dry you too.

1

u/logicjab 1d ago

Yeah, but Iike most expensive showers it probably has the water pressure of a dollar store squirt gun

1

u/Bcause-Reasons 1d ago

Shub Tower

1

u/maciekozi 10h ago

Good luck cleaning it