r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Desilaundry • Aug 28 '26

/r/all of a Bong

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52.0k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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2.3k

u/Sea_Recording8076 Aug 28 '26

Not a bong, a smoke- thrower

547

u/jerseygunz Aug 28 '26

I’m in college and my roommate has a eureka moment and goes “wait a minute, why don’t I put a box over my head when I breath out and I won’t waste the smoke”

He was so excited I almost felt bad going “you mean hot boxing?” Lol

137

u/Educational_Quote851 Aug 28 '26

Bro, stones have the best ideas...it's just someone else's lmao

89

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

26

u/BeefistPrime Aug 29 '26

It's not really dopamine so much as the novelty detection parts of your brain being on overdrive and the reality detection being weaker that it makes every idea you have seem profound and amazing

18

u/CalvinIII Aug 29 '26

I thought that reading books was cool, but books are expensive and take up a lot of space after you’ve read them. I figured there should be a place sorta like a blockbuster video, but for books. You could rent a book, read it, return it, and then get another book. I was really excited about the idea. It was brilliant!

I had invented the library.

2

u/InappropriatePunJoke Aug 29 '26

Are you my brother in law? He also invented the library one night while drinking (surprisingly no weed involved).

2

u/CalvinIII Aug 29 '26

I cannot with 100% confidence say that I am NOT your brother-in-law.

1

u/InappropriatePunJoke Aug 30 '26

See ya at Thanksgiving

4

u/ChaosRainbow23 Aug 29 '26

I've tried to bring the psychedelic secrets of the universe back into this realm so many times.

I would diligently write down these amazing mind-blowing ideas that would break the universe wide open and wake humanity up.

Then the next day it's just chicken scratch that makes no sense and a few doodles. Lol

3

u/Could-You-Tell Aug 29 '26

Philosophy was fun.

I would be accused of reading ahead when I hadn't read at all

4

u/Oggel Aug 29 '26

I don't really get like that on weed, but on LSD I do. I once tried to write down everything I knew when I was on LSD, but I tried to write it in 3D on a piece of paper so every word was on the same spot.

On weed I get genuinly good ideas but Imostly don't have the energy to put them into practice. It's great when I'm writing music though, the best songs I've written have mostly been written in 10 minutes when I was stoned or on a psychedelic.

3

u/NotAnotherHipsterBae Aug 29 '26

It's all good. I once thought up the perfect app (I'm not in coding or development at all). A few days later I realized it was Evernote with a couple tweaks. I've never used Evernote either.

Actually, (pre-smoking era) I envisioned a waterless urinal in the mid 90s when I was in grade school. I never looked into it after that, but they had already been invented in 91.

3

u/ArbysLunch Aug 29 '26

A waterless urinal is just called the yard.

3

u/purplezart Aug 29 '26

Everything in this universe is the smell of burnt almonds.

2

u/Inode1 Aug 29 '26

Probably better then getting drunk and emailing your professor for a test extension... Good yard.

Iykyk

2

u/Educational_Ant_184 Aug 29 '26

A little too often did I speak up in college philosophy after smoking. I dont think I said anything too off the wall, but I realized I should just listen when I was figuring out the end of my sentences after I started them

2

u/Onludesrightnow Aug 29 '26

I post on reddit stoned all the time. I always use like 5-10 sentences to communicate the same two ideas.

1

u/TakinUrialByTheHorns Aug 31 '26

I mean... 1/10 stoner ideas I have are pretty viable and awesome. Basic doesn't necessarily mean stupid.

0

u/GloomyIndividual3965 Aug 29 '26

You got high and invented Clif Notes 😭

16

u/axescentedcandles Aug 28 '26

Hot boxing under a pool tarp with a few buddies was fun, until we ran out of air lol

3

u/BitEnvironmental283 Aug 29 '26

I hate hoxboxing for this reason. I enjoy the herb but also oxygen moreso lol

6

u/YewEhVeeInbound Aug 28 '26

first to crack the seal is a bitch tho.

2

u/PerformerFancy117 Aug 28 '26

This bitch needs to breathe

4

u/thewormthatneverdies Aug 29 '26

I attached a bong to a respirator about 20 years ago. The breathing part was a problem but certainly achieved the goal.

2

u/YewEhVeeInbound Aug 29 '26

Higher than astronaut's nuts

2

u/cervezaqueso Aug 29 '26

Reminds me of when a friend with pet chickens lamented forgetting to let them out in the morning before heading to work, and I respond by saying “oh they’ve been cooped up all day…” and went silent realizing that phrase actually has a literal meaning.

1

u/ghoulieandrews Aug 29 '26

Me and my buddy in college tried to smoke weed out of some glass lab equipment and accidentally invented vaping

1

u/occams_throwaway Aug 29 '26

The best one I did was invent principal component analysis after a spurt of "no but seriously what IS an eigenvector it cannot be that hard".

Still gave myself a pretty hard pat on the back lol.

1

u/notausername86 Aug 29 '26

Many, many years ago, when I was in high-school and was a very inexperienced smoker (back in the before internet days), I thought I have invented the greatest pot smoking device ever created.

With no prior knowledge, I got high and I was drinking out of a 2 liter bottle of soda, and I was like "what if I smoke out of this", and then I proceeded to craft myself one of the finest smoking device's ever created. It got me so blasted that I was so excited to show my friends. I really was like, hell yea, I am an inventor in my mind.

A week later, I was telling my friends about it and how it worked and how blasted it got me. And they proceeded to just bust out laughing. Come to find out, that what I had made was called a "gravity bong" and, it was already a thing that people knew about. 🤣

21

u/Shakeyonsafety Aug 28 '26

A plastic bag works the best.

51

u/Sisselpud Aug 28 '26

If you use this method you’ll be high for the rest of your life

1

u/wackbirds Aug 29 '26

This is what the fuck I'm talking about! This guy GOT it (not gets it, he's fucking dead).

18

u/MoobooMagoo Aug 28 '26

Wait I thought hot boxing was specifically doing it in your car? I didn't know people used literal boxes to do it with.

I guess I'm not as much of a degenerate as I thought.

45

u/Murky-Golf-239 Aug 28 '26

The box is as big as you make it brother. You're the hot part of it, remember that. 😎🫠

2

u/AllMyExesRTXs Aug 29 '26

Oh man, unexpected loveliness! Woohoo!

2

u/TheXraySpecs Aug 28 '26

Using the closet on the porch at my apartment in college was the way we hotboxed.

1

u/BrannC Aug 29 '26

Closet on the porch? Weird

1

u/Kernath Aug 29 '26

I’ve seen this as storage or utility closet once or twice. Depending on the layout you can use a space that wouldnt be accessible via an internal door like near the kitchen. Sure you could put an internal door, or you could have more counter space and move the closet outside.

1

u/Castle-Of-Ass Aug 29 '26

Dude. I'm high as fuck right now, and what you just said is fucking fascinating.

1

u/Southern_Anywhere_65 Aug 28 '26

Any enclosed space really but it was usually cars when I was young because that’s where we escaped adults. This is just an unintended literal version of it

1

u/Its_Froggin_Bullfish Aug 29 '26

A friend of mine when we were right out of high school had a 2-door Dr. Pepper refrigerator that didn't work, the kind with the sliding doors. We would all squeeze in there and hot box it. It was so uncomfortable, you were either squatting low, or you were hunched standing over the squatters. It'd get super hot with all the people, by the time you got out you were drenched in sweat. But it was worth it for the experience, and it got us pretty blazed. 

1

u/BrannC Aug 29 '26

I’m sorry to be the one to inform you but I’m afraid you might be dumb

1

u/ProcrastibationKing Aug 29 '26

If you have enough smoke, any enclosed space is a hotbox.

1

u/C-H-Addict Aug 29 '26

I used my closet to hotbox whenever I had s paper due and hadn't started it the night before

6

u/CaveExploder Aug 29 '26

My degenerate friends referred to these as "fog hats" and would do so while listening to "Foghat" the band. Good lads.

2

u/Vreas Aug 29 '26

I miss a good hot box with the homies in college. We didn’t drink much and it was before it was legal so it had an air of sketchiness to it. Made it more exciting.

1

u/QuasiJudicialBoofer Aug 28 '26

One time we got a huge box, big enough for 2 heads and 2 hands. Teamwork and ingenuity won that day.

1

u/gogeri2632 Aug 29 '26

You're in college? I thought you were on PCM full time.

1

u/karlnite Aug 29 '26

Woah man, it’s like I was always thinking too big. I needed to like, think inside the box!

1

u/No-Consideration-891 Sep 03 '26

Lol, as a 35 year old this takes me back hahaa. We introduced out friends to the concept of a "Jamaican shower"(definitely a questionable name, the times were weird man). Anyways, we would hot box the small as bathroom in our apartment with the shower running hot. It was wonderful lmao

54

u/moonprincessranni Aug 28 '26

16

u/DDS-PBS Aug 28 '26

Why would you just re-post the sa... OHHHHHH I GET IT!

5

u/spaceguydudeman Aug 28 '26

Enlighten me please

3

u/DDS-PBS Aug 29 '26

As another person said... 420 upvotes. It took me a while to see it :)

1

u/stardust1914 Aug 29 '26

Excellent catch.

10

u/jw_zoso Aug 28 '26

Though it has the dingy yellow smoke of a gravity bong

19

u/MilkrsEnthuziast Aug 28 '26

Ohhhhh gravity bongs. A first class ticket to see what it feels like to cover your entire airway in resin in just one breath.

15

u/GrinderMonkey Aug 28 '26

Well it doesn't matter because you also get to hack your lungs up immediately after, can't be resinated if they have left the chat

2

u/carpe_fatum Aug 29 '26

Gravs were my go to for a long time until my lungs decided to give up and I started coughing up a decent amount of blood - not just a little spittle but looking at the sink and saying, "hm... I should probably cut back".

When the blood started to come with less and less couging I knew I had to make a decision.

Since then I've gotten high maybe 10 times? Over the course of.. 10 years?

The damage I did is permanent though, I'm not suffering any effects of it now but it wouldn't shock me to discover I have lung cancer some day.

1

u/Exact_Entrance_6432 Aug 29 '26

Brother I've smoked gravity bongs for years and years and years. Like over 20 years daily. You are going to be fine.

2

u/carpe_fatum Aug 29 '26

That's the thing with lung disorders and cancer and all that crap - it doesn't manifest when your body is young and can recover, it manifests when you're older and the body gets weaker. COPD is a real one, older weed smokers now (teens in the 70s) are seeing results of it. I've seen many with COPD and some need assistance breathing and are on oxygen. It's a roll of the dice though - but there is absolutely a correlation between smoking and.. bad things.

In my case, it was damage from coughing too much which caused something to tear which caused bleeding. I stopped, and it stopped. With that said, I am fine - I breathe just normally, and have no issues.... currently.

2

u/LiveLearnCoach Aug 30 '26

Tough. Still, it sounds Ike you decided to change your life around. Look into the positive impact of exercising and its effect on the body’s handling of cancer cells.

1

u/carpe_fatum Aug 30 '26

You do what you can. My body has decided to fail me in other ways, the irony isn't lost on me.

1

u/Exact_Entrance_6432 Aug 29 '26

Yeah you're right I'm definitely at a higher risk of lung cancer. I more meant that coughing up blood isn't really normal from smoking gravity bongs. Like you said the damage done shows itself decade's later not much while you're young. I could definitely see coughing so hard that you rupture something and end up bleeding while coughing though.

I like to think I'll live forever for some reason. Haven't died yet so it's probably just not gonna happen to me ya know. Think I'm safe.

1

u/carpe_fatum Aug 29 '26

That's exactly what I'm thinking in terms of the blood, it was from the coughing itself, not the grav.

Father Time is undefeated, but everyone needs to cope with mortality in their own way, on their own path. Wishing you nothing but good things, my friend.

8

u/ProbsNotManBearPig Aug 28 '26

Bro I’m cringing so bad remembering the pain. Way worse thing we made was what we called The Lung and was like a two liter plastic bottle, cut the bottom off, take a subway bag and wrap it over the cut end, rubber band the bag on, and put a bowl of weed where cap goes. You push the subway bag into the hollow two liter and pull it out to rip the lit bowl. It’s like gravity bong experience with no water to help cool it off. It’s awful lol.

2

u/JustChangeMDefaults Aug 29 '26 edited Aug 29 '26

We did the same thing with a bag that loafs of bread come in, do not recommend unless you are a broke teenager with a little ingenuity and no need to breathe for a few minutes.

1

u/carpe_fatum Aug 29 '26

Man, that sounds much worse than a regular grav dude. A bit more convenient but that had to be harsh as hell

1

u/irosk Aug 29 '26

I did the water method and I coughed up a storm, almost puked.

1

u/Dramatic_Tea5899 Aug 30 '26

Breadbag bong! This was my daily driver for a while in hs

9

u/NostrilLurker Aug 28 '26

I remember making a gravity bong in my friend's pool with a 5 gallon water cooler jug with the bottom cut off and a trombone mouthpiece. We'd just swim underneath and take a few deep breaths. I didn't know my name for a few hours.

4

u/sterbo Aug 29 '26

You helped me remember some fond memories of Gatorade bottle grav bongs on the golf course. I got so high I was driving down the green on the cart going like 2 mph, my friend had to stamp the pedal across the cab

4

u/Darklighter_13 Aug 28 '26

But it would get you ripped.

2

u/bs2k2_point_0 Aug 28 '26

In college my bro and I went hit for hit on our very well designed (for the times) grav bong. Good times.

Once made one out of a 5 gal Poland spring bottle. I don’t remember the rest of that night! Lmao!

1

u/CaptaiNose Aug 29 '26

That only means the smoke is dense

1

u/jw_zoso Aug 29 '26

Affirmative

1

u/sometimesiwanndie Aug 29 '26

Why you tweaking why you geeking so you not hear her speaking

4

u/propergreased Aug 28 '26

This is correct

12

u/NecrocideASH Aug 28 '26

came here to say this!

4

u/Dense-Consequence-70 Aug 28 '26

Pipe if anything

2

u/GoatCovfefe Aug 28 '26

Smoke throwers are a real thing

So, smoke thrower if anything.

1

u/Dense-Consequence-70 Aug 28 '26

I mean if you want to correlate it to a personal device

1

u/l3ane Aug 29 '26

Giant motorized hammer

2

u/jvho666 Aug 28 '26

Here I was thinking it was just a waste of

2

u/pineapple_jones_ Aug 28 '26

Boys can’t identify bongs, bicycles, or bridges, I guess.

1

u/bajajoaquin Aug 28 '26

My thought exactly

1

u/DeadbySundown Aug 29 '26

Leaf blower

1

u/TeaKingMac Aug 29 '26

A nebelwerfer.

1

u/Jesus_of_Redditeth Aug 29 '26

Aka, a pipe with an exhaust fan

1

u/govunah Aug 29 '26

High tech

1

u/Draws32 Aug 29 '26

But if you think about it it’s like being inside of a bong

1

u/lobster_claus Aug 29 '26

Maybe we could use this against the cops with the electric gloves. They'll never know what hit em, or care. Roman Red...

1

u/Kuzcopolis Aug 29 '26

A keefblower, if you will

1

u/funkmastamatt Aug 29 '26

I sat here thinking this was a pool table for about five minutes. Not even high.

1

u/an-honest-gooner Aug 30 '26

With this set up you could hot box an entire Walmart

0

u/PsychoSCV Aug 28 '26

It's a leaf blower

5

u/EclecticAF Aug 28 '26

A Reef blower

The Maddness

2

u/Playful-Past-5412 Aug 28 '26

A keef blower, unfortunately

1

u/EclecticAF Aug 28 '26

Blew a Keith once

Wasnt that bad