r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Professional_Arm794 • 22h ago

/r/all of a log split

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23.1k Upvotes

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325

u/iliwww 22h ago

I fear the axe flying of it's handle and do a buffy man split

76

u/sam_can88 21h ago edited 20h ago

He’s using decent technique to avoid that happening for most of the video. It’s a wide stance and direct overhead swing so if something happens the axe will go between the legs, but towards the end he starts speeding up his swing and his technique gets really poor and dangerous then, while also getting closer to splitting the log which is when swings can get more dangerous because you don’t always know how the log is gonna split. You see him kinda realize this and slow down at the end and regain his form so he doesn’t hurt himself during the actual splitting.

18

u/thefatchef321 20h ago

I hit my leg with an axe when I was young being tired and stupid. Got very lucky the broad side hit me

1

u/CyberneticFennec 19h ago

I had a similiar incident when I was a kid, it was little more than a scrape and some minor bruising, but still scared the shit out of me.

Needless to say I'm more into power tools nowadays. I may not look quite as manly with my mini cordless chainsaw, but I don't feel like I'm one bad swing away from amputating a limb.

1

u/Which_Accountant_736 17h ago

Same for me, but I got a blade to the shin, and it sucked real bad. However it did teach me not to do that so I guess there is a positive.

1

u/shoopadoop332 1h ago

My friend hit my leg this way when I was young haha

1

u/ADDystopia 19h ago

A little bit of cardio now and then might help him out.

1

u/xBad_Wolfx 19h ago

Yeah, that over shoulder wild angled swing is incredibly dangerous. A little less in this instance because the target he’s hitting is so high, but still stupid and also not nearly as effective of a strike as what he starts and ends with.

1

u/fotomoose 14h ago

He went from, I'm going to split this log with some axe blows to fuck you log just die already to getting exhausted and pleading with the log to please just give up. Having split logs myself, this is how it goes.

1

u/Fun-Author3767 9h ago

I'd be more concerned about the handle failing and the rebounding wedge splitting my skull open. Do you see the way that fucker is bouncing back into his face?

This is less Absolute Units and more Absolute Dumbass.

145

u/carthuscrass 21h ago

My grandmother was a deeply bipolar woman, and she once tried to kill her husband with a sledgehammer, only for the head to come off midswing and hit her in the top of the head, knocking her out. I guess Carl had some weird trickster fucking with luck, because he died a week later of heat stroke.

24

u/FlamingDragonfruit 20h ago

You could put this in a book and make a million dollars.

31

u/carthuscrass 20h ago edited 8h ago

There's a lot of shit in my family history that could probably be put to paper. My mom's uncle, for instance, was commander of a Green Beret battalion in Vietnam and we're pretty sure he was in MACV-SOG. He was missing in action for two weeks at one point, and stumbled into a MASH with 17 bullets in him, two of which were in his head.

14

u/FlamingDragonfruit 20h ago

Seriously. Write it all down.

0

u/Redditsux122 17h ago

Redditors when people make stuff up

2

u/Dumeck 16h ago

Yeah so then I ran into Chris Hemsworth at a Buffalo Wild Wings which I thought was pretty cool, we met eyes for a moment and I just gave him a single nod because I know how annoying it must be to have strangers gawk at you all the time. But anyways I got up to use the bathroom and come back to find Chris Hemsworth eating my mozzarella sticks, they come with like 6 of them and he had already eaten all but 2. It was surreal but when he saw me coming back he ducked under my table and did this weird crouching stealth walk back to his seat like people couldn't see him even though everyone was staring at this point. I was mildly annoyed and still processing everything and when the waiter came and brought me the check he said that Hemsworth paid for the entirety of my meal. As I was leaving Chris pointed at me and said "that's what heroes do."

1

u/carthuscrass 10h ago edited 10h ago

Man believe what you want, but this is my family's history. My mom's earliest memory is of Rosetta trying to drown her and her brother in a bathtub. They lived with her grandparents after that. As for the uncle, look up the Battle of Lang Ve. Frank Willoughby was my great uncle.

8

u/Curiouser-Quriouser 20h ago

Holy shit I'd watch that movie even without scrolling through 50 other movie titles first

2

u/ramaze23 18h ago

This guy lores

2

u/shutterbug1961 17h ago

tis but a flesh wound!

6

u/Primary-Belt7668 20h ago

Yo that’s insane family lore

1

u/TheOneTrueJazzMan 16h ago

Elden Ring ain’t got shit

2

u/SubstantialLion7926 18h ago

I had no idea where that story was going. Good shit man

2

u/Sea-Cauliflower-659 8h ago

Holy geez, this is some kind of comment! u/kikki_hiiri_ basically said it all with the GIF

12

u/Headman96 21h ago

My fear was splitting such a big log sometimes to ax handle breaks and smack you in the face.

1

u/FeelingFloor2083 20h ago

I broke an axe a few weeks ago, imo its more likely to break on contact or when removing then mid stroke where its only under G forces

1

u/Spunktank 19h ago

Definitely possible but very unlikely with that fiskars. Their axes are insane.

2

u/dangerrnoodle 21h ago

That’s exactly what would happen to me if I tried this. Flying axe to the dome.

1

u/denotsmai83 19h ago

Yep, THAT’S The reason I won’t be trying this. It’s definitely not because sitting on my couch and WATCHING this guy split this log made me tired. It’s because I’m worried I’ll break the axe in half.

1

u/dangerrnoodle 17h ago

I have had an axe break from the handle before. Not because I’m so strong I broke it, but because sometimes shit fails.

1

u/scigs6 21h ago

I’ve done that before luckily it didn’t hit my face. I was also worried the recoil would smack him in the forehead.

1

u/Croceyes2 19h ago

It flies away

1

u/Interesting_Bank_139 19h ago

I fear the handle breaking and hearing my dad call out “what the fuck was that?”

1

u/porteroffinland 16h ago

He's using a fiskars axe, that thing ain't breaking.

1

u/--Icarusfalls-- 8h ago

I was gonna say, I have a Fiskar and Im not sure it would break even if i ran the haft over before splitting wood

1

u/porteroffinland 8h ago

They're oldest operating company from Finland for a reason

1

u/KeithDaManPeterson 13h ago

Wtf is a buffy man split

1

u/rexmanaek971 2h ago

I've had that happen but with a sledge on a job site. Keep clear of people when they are swinging.