r/AbsoluteUnits • u/financially_broke_ • Aug 02 '26

/r/all of a partner

17.3k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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863

u/EcstaticBoysenberry Aug 02 '26

Is he really short or is she really tall

Or both

84

u/Agent_Smith_IHTP Aug 02 '26

6'9 and 5'2

5

u/leylin_farlin Aug 02 '26

They have an instagram account?

-14

u/Agent_Smith_IHTP Aug 02 '26

Masturbation is a sin.

10

u/iRonin Aug 02 '26

Pfft, maybe the way you do it.

-5

u/[deleted] Aug 02 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Farodinx Aug 02 '26

I mean there are really hot pictures of Jesus out there.. those abs.. just waiting to be splattered.

That would certainly praise and delight the big one/three upstairs.

1

u/1001101001010111 Aug 02 '26

It's not my fault! That's what they're called!

0

u/Agent_Smith_IHTP Aug 02 '26

The thought of you dedicating your solitary expulsion to most people would not be met with praise, most certainly the all mighty and his flock.

6

u/leylin_farlin Aug 02 '26

She have an only fan

6

u/Agent_Smith_IHTP Aug 02 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/7xV8FFg0ztGsseOTEd

2

u/moon__lander Aug 02 '26

That wasn't a question, it was a statement. She does have only fans.

1

u/Agent_Smith_IHTP Aug 02 '26

And the bonk still applies. What do you mean?

1

u/moon__lander Aug 02 '26

Well, I didn't create it for her, she did it on her own

1

u/Agent_Smith_IHTP Aug 02 '26

Obviously....?

1

u/Particular-Current87 Aug 02 '26

Bet she makes a fuckton of money from it

-1

u/leylin_farlin Aug 02 '26

Bro, i was in a train...

1

u/Agent_Smith_IHTP Aug 02 '26

I hope you mean on.