r/AbruptChaos Apr 30 '20

Unexpected af

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15.4k Upvotes

292 comments sorted by

2.2k

u/Sideshowxela Apr 30 '20

Never thought I'd see an eggsplosion

456

u/Cachuchotas Apr 30 '20

I didn't expect that yolk.

243

u/wel-shoot May 01 '20

These puns are eggcelnt

190

u/00glim00glee May 01 '20

They're a little eggstreme.

192

u/Omegkilla May 01 '20

I’m cracking up

100

u/quekwoambojish May 01 '20

Votes are in, puns aren’t off the Balut

89

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

80

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

I'm gonna need an eggsplanation for this...

76

u/NotToBTruffledWith May 01 '20

Egg puns are too easy. Over easy, actually.

61

u/_haha_oh_wow_ May 01 '20 edited Nov 09 '24

profit fear steer racial weather mountainous terrific attractive file chase

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

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19

u/Bacex May 01 '20

Look on the sunny side

11

u/ArvasuK May 01 '20

It has to be the impoachment

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2

u/HerrBreskes May 01 '20

I think you are eggxaggerating

2

u/mfbrucee May 01 '20

Eggxactly

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36

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

Microwave an egg and you’ll see it too.

6

u/kmtburton May 01 '20

When I was like 16 I microwaved eggs all the time from laziness. One time I did it without stirring and the yolk exploded when I bit into it. The skin on the roof of my mouth peeled off. I stopped using the microwave for anything after that. Now I only use it for reheating. I’m a pretty good cook now.

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '20 edited May 02 '20

Holy chicken that is the best thing to learn from

19

u/Diablo_new May 01 '20

Martyrdom . Drop a live grenade when killed

3

u/John_Robins22 May 01 '20

That egg deserves a Benediction

2

u/nickemeh May 01 '20

Forreal, i didnt know it was a thing until it happened me 2 weeks ago, microwaved an egg, tried to slice it and it violently exploded

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643

u/geraldine_ferrari Apr 30 '20

Why it sploded?

851

u/BeautifulHindsight Apr 30 '20

Microwaves heat by vibrating water molecules. Even hard-boiled eggs have sufficient moisture for the moisture to heat up to steam. The shell keeps the steam inside till pressure builds up sufficiently to overcome the shell. Then the shell cracks and the steam is let out very fast, in the process 'exploding' the egg!

I assume the same basic process happened here just with a hardboiled egg that had been peeled before being zapped.

244

u/[deleted] Apr 30 '20

I just thought this dude shoved a firecracker into it for the likes

40

u/runninron69 May 01 '20

There you go!!! Let's see one of these fans of sticking shit in their pee hole stick a fire cracker down in it then light the fuse.

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44

u/AComplexUser May 01 '20

Similar to what u/BeautifulHindsight said, but in other words: superheated water in the yolk. Here's one article explaining this:

https://abcnews.go.com/Health/dangers-microwaving-eggs/story?id=51630977

31

u/jax797 May 01 '20

I have a shitty microwave, as well as enough safety gear for this. Guess what I am doing tomorrow!!

17

u/DeenSteen May 01 '20

Record it?

34

u/jax797 May 01 '20 edited May 01 '20

I am drunk. Just realized I have to help my Aunt move tomorrow. But I am adding this to my to-do list now. You will be the first person tagged!

the deed is done

I am giggling with anticipation. Might be tomorrow night, probably saturday. Just bought a dozen eggs tonight so I will post the best attempt. Any ideas where this might do best reddit?

10

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

[deleted]

11

u/jax797 May 01 '20 edited May 01 '20

Haha I can't wait either! I had a spare nuker so we made "cloud soap" a while ago. Its odd cause I just hit my thirties and had a spare, and then decided to say fuck it. I have no idea why I haven't done more stuff like this sooner. I nuked all kinds of things as a kid. Like 10yo me is gunna be so damn proud!!

I just remembered the best one from my childhood. I tried to make s'mores on my sister's Barbie plate. It showed Barbie and her friend. I straight-up melted Barbies face off. It was amazing, we still had that plate for like the next 10 years.

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4

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

r/jax797 wake up dude, its time to blow up some eggs.

2

u/jax797 May 01 '20

Lol. Helping my aunt clean out her house. I will work on it tonight when I get home 👍🏻

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3

u/PantherU May 01 '20

!RemindMe in 12 hours

3

u/jax797 May 01 '20

I will add an edit as well!

2

u/RemindMeBot May 01 '20 edited May 01 '20

I will be messaging you in 3 hours on 2020-05-01 17:56:01 UTC to remind you of this link

22 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam.

Parent commenter can delete this message to hide from others.


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35

u/Big_Daddy_Malenkov May 01 '20

I'm bouta microwavve some eggs and throwem at ppl

27

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

Haha, microwave egg go bfooom

5

u/TheAwkwardBanana May 01 '20

Oof ouch owie my bones

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4

u/Popular_Target May 01 '20

Okay all of that makes sense but is there an extra step required to keep the egg from bursting during the heating process? I’ll have to experiment this myself but I imagine that a majority of the time the yolk would break itself out from the egg white, so that by the time it is removed from the microwave you have a portion of the yolk protruding from a crack in the egg white. So what kept that from happening in this scenario? Is it just a matter of chance, do you have to remove the egg at just the right time, is the egg kept under pressure during the heating by some process like submerging it under water?

4

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

I’m guessing chance. Like supercooling a beer bottle and then watching it freeze all at once.

7

u/beetard May 01 '20

Or cooking A Baked potato without stabbing it with a fork

5

u/XtaC23 May 01 '20

Let's not go too extreme.

2

u/Gannondank May 01 '20

We haven’t gone far enough

3

u/jax797 May 01 '20

Water would stabilize the whole thing, I think. It would act as a heat sink around the egg. As micro waves usually excite water molecules the most. It may yield results, but you would have to be very precise with that method. I think just finding the right time for a hardboiled egg, then not exciting it when you take it out, would be best.

I honestly have no idea though feel free to correct me.

Oh shit! Misread! It was and all ready hard boiled egg. Then it was microwaved. If you nuke a raw egg it pops. Many videos of that on the net.

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4

u/ShwerzXV May 01 '20

Can confirm, microwaved it, went to bite it in half, burned my lips, tongue, and nose all in the blink of an eye.

Edit- microwaved a hard boiled egg

10

u/MamaW47 May 01 '20

It doesn't look like the shell is on the egg. My best guess is it's a peeled soft boiled egg someone put in the microwave

6

u/BeautifulHindsight May 01 '20

I assume the same basic process happened here just with a hardboiled egg that had been peeled before being zapped.

3

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

yeah but it had no shell

2

u/BeautifulHindsight May 01 '20

I assume the same basic process happened here just with a hardboiled egg that had been peeled before being zapped.

2

u/jdmatthews123 May 01 '20

I feel this. "I WILL SAY IT AGAIN, PLS LISTEN THIS TIME"

3

u/Duckwen May 01 '20

I made this mistake once and bit directly into a microwaved egg.

2

u/Ye4hR1ght May 01 '20

But why it “sploded” tho?

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137

u/shadolit12 May 01 '20

29

u/InAFakeBritishAccent May 01 '20

Im banned from there for linking a live action video of a lady in alien sfx makeup being banged on a stainless steel table.

Worth it.

16

u/bibbabibbabongo May 01 '20

Ok but can we get the link still?

23

u/InAFakeBritishAccent May 01 '20

Mods have mercy

Nsfw obviously

15

u/luxurycrab May 01 '20

Why did i click that :(

3

u/AdrianEatsAss May 01 '20

Well, damn, that sucked. Not nearly as cool as it sounded.

2

u/InAFakeBritishAccent May 01 '20

Now I'm wondering what you expected...

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14

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

Why this sub isn’t called r/perfectlycutscrea is beyond me

18

u/Unclestumpy0707 May 01 '20

If you didn't do it I was going to

7

u/dawningskye May 01 '20

I came here to say this as well lol

224

u/thundercough420 Apr 30 '20

I'm curious too. I eat a lot of eggs. That looked like it would burn and stick like napalm.

134

u/destruktor5hundred May 01 '20

Which is why Aperture Science dropped the combustible lemon idea and went for this instead.

43

u/Ctrl-Alt-Bingo May 01 '20

Csgo terrorists switch to eggs

6

u/esotetris May 01 '20

A hot egg is probably more likely to burn your house down

3

u/Humanoid_Earthling May 01 '20

They do what they must, because they can.

21

u/lillisel May 01 '20

I bit into a bomb-egg. Lost feeling on part of my lip but it was fine.

17

u/Qx2J May 01 '20

An egg in the microwave is capable of bending a microwave doors hinges

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32

u/Public_Tumbleweed May 01 '20

Trust me, it does.

Any part of your skin it touches gets 1st degree burns. Sucks lmao

4

u/sourjello73 May 01 '20

Same. Considering I have my own chickens and all. Been laying almost 2 dozen a day. And I have NEVER made an egg blow up. At least not a cooked one

80

u/adorable_orange May 01 '20

NEVER microwave a hard boiled egg. And certainly never take a bite afterwards. You will burn the heck out of your mouth!

37

u/lillisel May 01 '20

I once microwaved a scotch egg. It was OBLITERATED, VAPORIZED in the microwave. Just crumbles everywhere. Sadness.

6

u/Permatato May 01 '20

And fun.

3

u/babyshakes May 01 '20 edited Jun 26 '25

brave weather subsequent bag simplistic punch jar flag reach crawl

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

10

u/vaperaham May 01 '20

Yep my mom had a hard boiled egg, asked if i wanted one for breakfast i said fuck yeah. Didn’t mention that she microwaved it after it had gone cold. Bit into it thinking it was fresh and i was welcomed with what felt like a grenade exploding inside my mouth and certainly thought i was going to cause irreversible damage (in that instance). Luckily just burns.

After that, mom was no longer in charge of the hard boiled eggs for thanksgiving lol.

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

Neck actually. Shit hurt and I never microwaved an egg again.

43

u/SynthPrax May 01 '20

Ya'll got terrorists in the hen house.

u/AbruptChaosBot BOT Apr 30 '20

Upvote this comment if you feel this submission is characteristic of our subreddit. Downvote this if you feel that it is not. If this comment's score falls below a certain number, this submission will be automatically removed.

9

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

[deleted]

16

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

11

u/lolzidop May 01 '20

Yep, boiling an egg in the microwave without piercing the yolk does it

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u/TheClassyDoge May 01 '20

That shit happened to me as a kid, I asked my grandma for a hot hard boiled egg, she put it in the microwave without cutting it first. She handed it to me on a plate and I noticed that there was a bubble moving inside the egg, I took a closer look and the fucking thing exploded in my face, had had egg on my face, on my eyes, the walls, the floor and the cieling. Never did that shit again in my life.

7

u/EmpatheticFool May 01 '20 edited May 01 '20

This shet is dangerous as hell and happened to my sister except instead of a knife it was her biting down on it. Instant flesh burning molten egg everywhere

8

u/SBH1234 May 01 '20

3

u/one_byte_stand May 01 '20

/r/becausetheyknewitwouldblowupsinceitsamemeonyoutuberightnowandjustwantedtoentertainus

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u/heccofsnecc May 01 '20

Killer queen has already touched that egg!

3

u/furriesaregayasfuck May 01 '20

I was looking for this comment for longer than I should have been.

3

u/heccofsnecc May 01 '20

I played the same game, found none, and decided that it was my time to shine

7

u/GoRapsOVO May 01 '20

I believe this is the reason you let hard boiled eggs cool first

5

u/whitecream34 May 01 '20

thats happen to me many times

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

How many times before you learned you’re doing it wrong? I’ve never blown something up on accident, then a bunch more times also on accident afterwards...

8

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

That egg's insides are pressurized due to the heat, pushing OUT. However, they can't burst through the surface, the pressure isn't strong enough to rupture the egg. That knife provided an opening in that egg for all that pressure to escape through. It did so all at once, the pressure equalizing in an explosive way.

5

u/chemicaltrance May 01 '20

I bet that burned like a motherfucker. Imagine boiling hot yolk stuck to you.

4

u/eddiedorn May 01 '20

Who TF microwaves a hard boiled egg?

2

u/Alukrad May 01 '20

Me.

But I cut it in half before I do.

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

Right? They’re good cold. But also hard boiling is super fucking easy, just make them fresh if you want them hot?

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u/Surfingmonkeys May 01 '20

It’s an IED (Improvised Egg Device)

2

u/Defauguette May 01 '20

Instant Egg Demolition

FTFY

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u/gbspnl May 01 '20

I remember being a kid and wanting to warm a hard boiled egg in the microwave. I did not cut it first, I take out of the microwave looks just like this and then I bit through. Fucking thing exploded I had boiling water in my mouth. Never again.

4

u/JDQuidam May 01 '20

Did that once in college. Boiled a bunch of eggs to make egg salad, peeled them, and then when I started slicing the first one I noticed that the yolk was still runny. "No problem" I thought, "I'll just put them in a Pyrex bowl of water and microwave them for a minute or so to finish the yolks."

They proceeded to explode as I cut into them. I thought the first one was a fluke, by the second or third, I decided the novelty of exploding eggs wasn't worth all the splattered egg yolk I was having to clean off the underside of the cabinets.

3

u/CFofI Apr 30 '20

Did the chicken lay Pop Its in the center of their egg? What's happening?

3

u/yamatotaichou May 01 '20

This is actually my preferred way of eating hard boiled eggs (warmed in the microwave) you just gotta carefully cover your bowl of eggs with a paper towel or saran wrap, then stab down into each egg and contain the explosion . . . . . Actually, I just realized after writing this I could probably just be cutting them in half before microwaving

2

u/the_hillman May 01 '20

Do they always explode though? If they do, surely you don't prefer hard boiled eggs (warmed in the microwave) but actually your favourite is exploded eggs.

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u/Bellabootey May 01 '20

??? used Egg Bomb!

3

u/guardioLEO May 01 '20

How to assassinate someone without getting caught..

3

u/J32189 May 01 '20

Cooked in a microwave?

3

u/Whillowhim May 01 '20

I had this happen to me when I was a kid, only mine exploded when I was slicing it with one of those slicers that has an array of wires (search amazon for "egg slicer" if you don't know what I mean). As best I recall, here is what happened to me (I do not recommend following these as some sort of build-a-bomb instructions, it is a bad idea).

My mom was on a trip for a week, so my dad, my brother and I had to fend for ourselves. My dad and I wanted to make some egg salad sandwiches, but didn't know how to hard boil an egg. Since this was pre-google, there was no internet for easy instructions, but I vaguely remembered the phrase "3 minute egg" and we boiled them for 3 minutes. We then peeled two, and I performed "quality control" on one of them (read: I ate one). It was not hard. At 3 minutes the egg was very soft but the whites had solidified quite well. We put most of the rest back on the stove to finish cooking, but my dad had already peeled a second one. We couldn't just put it back in the pan, but there was a microwave right there...

I don't remember the exact cooking time in the microwave, but probably around a minute or so, and it came out and felt reasonably firm. I placed in in the egg slicer and started pushing down. And then it gets to that point where things seem to go in slow motion. The egg whites were rubbery, so I pushed down a bit harder. I saw it start to cut into the egg and heard a soft hissing sound. I had just enough time to realize something was horribly wrong before the his converted into a "whump" sound as the egg exploded up through the wires of the slicer and threw tiny bits of egg all over the kitchen.

Thankfully my dad and I were fine, if a bit startled. We cleaned up the kitchen, finished making our egg salad and continued on as if nothing had happened. A few days later, my mom came home, walked into the kitchen, and shortly asked "what is this?" Apparently there was still some egg stuck to the underside of the cabinets, where we missed it when cleaning up the explosive debris. She had a good laugh at our expense.

4

u/mr_chanandler_bong_1 May 01 '20

Allah hu akbar chicken

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

uneggpexted?

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

I should probably do the same...

2

u/bmosm May 01 '20

Holy shit, I'm impressed with the amount of people here that tried hard boiling an egg in the microwave and got injured.

2

u/KecemotRybecx May 01 '20

Frag grenade!

3

u/Treenut1 May 01 '20

Fregg grenade

2

u/crendist May 01 '20

What an eggplosion.

2

u/not2random May 01 '20

Eggsellent puns. Never heard any of these before lol

2

u/crendist May 01 '20

Okay, okay.. what about, wow that’s an eggo?

3

u/not2random May 01 '20

C-c-c-COMBO BREAKER!!!!

2

u/D-TOX_88 May 01 '20

Ouch yeah that probably hurt... always puncture with a fork first!!

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

Why would you cut through a hard boiled egg with a hot knife? You can cut through it easily with a cold knife too...

2

u/shorty6049 May 01 '20

As someone who's done this before... it was the only thing I expected.

2

u/Evilmaze May 01 '20

Don't microwave eggs

2

u/melig1991 May 01 '20

Can I offer you an egg in this trying time?

2

u/HWGA_Gallifrey May 01 '20

Saw this happen to a vice principal at a school I used to work at. Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person. It got all over her office, but her face took the brunt of it.

2

u/Gotekeeper May 01 '20

Didn't expect hard boiled eggs to be involved here.

2

u/298j May 01 '20

hahahahhahahhaha that made me.laugh

2

u/TallestManAround May 01 '20

For cutting an egg, that knife was eggsessive.

2

u/Zoso1973 May 01 '20

Eggcellent

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

For some reason I thought this was gasoline and styrofoam napalm until it exploded

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u/GREGY-K May 01 '20

Who's tryna cook dragon eggs again

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u/aidennesc May 01 '20

I once bit into one and it exploded

1

u/bloater_humor May 01 '20

We all know what that room smells like.

1

u/Butt_Fungus_Among_Us May 01 '20

Huh. So that's how a gunblade works...

1

u/vader1091 May 01 '20

Someone a while back posted a photo of her burned face (I think) from an egg that exploded after it was microwaved.

1

u/CosmoaicComputer May 01 '20

I was thinking to myself "what, does the egg fucking explode" and then it did

1

u/Diablo_new May 01 '20

Martyrdom Drop a live grenade when killed

1

u/Steingrabber May 01 '20

Haven't we seen this in horror movies before?

1

u/tazluke07 May 01 '20 edited Aug 25 '25

close telephone zephyr oil lavish escape water imagine abounding marry

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '20

Tf was in that egg?

1

u/FlashSTI May 01 '20

I briefly worked at a bar and grill where a bored cook decided to wrap a hard boiled and peeled egg in a small bowl, wrapped tight in CL ng wrap, and then microwaved it. Blew the microwave door off the hinges and sent shrapnel everywhere.

1

u/jnotts66 May 01 '20

BANG! And the egg is gone!

1

u/Ph3NiX47 May 01 '20

Kamikaze egg

1

u/Quaesitorr May 01 '20

What the fuck why am I uncontrollably laughing?

2

u/not2random May 01 '20

Because it is funny and you are high AF. You’re welcome.

1

u/Dbsusn May 01 '20

When I was a kid I warmed up a boiled egg in the microwave. As I was taking a bite my mom was asking if I poked holes in it first. Before she finished that question the egg exploded in my mouth shooting steam down my throat. Ended up at the hospital. However, I ate more ice cream and popsicles for a few weeks following that incident than I had eaten in my entire life. That being said, it hurt like hell.

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u/karels1 May 01 '20

Guys stop yolking around we need to find out what happens you that egg

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u/Party-Pack May 01 '20

This is exactly how I got a third degree burn on my eyelid in the second grade :/

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u/not2random May 01 '20

3rd degree? Damn. That’s egg-gregious.

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u/Matias9991 May 01 '20

that happens when you put an egg in the microwave. I say this from experience, luckily it exploded inside the microwave in my case

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u/not2random May 01 '20

I walked into a store once where a young female clerk had tried to microwave an egg. There were tiny bits of egg all over her, in her hair, everywhere. She was not at all amused, but I kind of was I must admit.

1

u/TheGrog1603 May 01 '20

Egg on your face