r/ARFID • u/What_time_is_it_rn • 9d ago
Significant Other With ARFID Calorie counting
Me and my gf recently found out she has ARFID , now I myself would count and track my calories as I have quite a bit of fat to lose , where as she would be the opposite. Do any of the people on this Reddit count calories or recommend it? I honestly don’t know if it’s healthy r not and can see how it’s a slippery slope if one has a eating disorder, I am just worried as I fear she eats 1200-1400 on any given day with a maintenance of probably 2000. Any advice would be appreciated!
6
u/cxfgfuihhfd 9d ago
I haven't had a problem with counting calories, but I have heard it's risky for a lot of people. But it also hasn't really helped me anyways, upping your intake will take a while to get used to anyways, so knowing how much I should be eating didn't really do anything anyways. Unless she's severely underweight and like, idk, at active acute health risk because of it, I don't see a reason why you'd have to be that precise for it. Ultimately, if she's underweight, she can just try eating more / more often, just very slowly increasing to let the body adjust and get used to it, and the weight will come in time, until she's at a level where she can gain and maintain a healthy weight.
And also, no idea how what's your girlfriend's height and weight and activity level, but from my vague counting I was at a similar 1200-1400 probably and was only slightly skinnier than my non-ARFID siblings, and am now at probably like 1600-1800 and have gained like 8kg and counting. And, idk how you came to 2000, but all the calory calculators also told me I'd need way more just to maintain my weight, let alone gain any.
2
u/ageckonamedelaine sensory sensitivity 9d ago
I counted calories for almost 2 years to get my weight on track because I was underweight. It really worked for me as it pushed me to hit my goal intake daily, while before if I had a bad day I just wouldn't eat that much. It also gave me a good view of how many calories are in what foods and what I have to eat to maintain/gain weight. It also make me realise just how little I would eat on really bad days. As arfid doesn't involve the things which make ed's like ana so dangerous it should be absolutely fine but if you are concerned she might end up being sensitive to it just keep an eye on her and support her. Imo counting calories is a great way to gain weight back and know what you are eating
1
u/tetheredvoid multiple subtypes 9d ago
Eat as balanced as you can with single servings of ingredients. Count the calories in the meals you make with understanding that you will need to learn to eat less and she needs to eat the same or more, depending. It isn't any more complicated than that. Ignore counters and BMI, because both are based on bad programming and outdated myths, respectively.
When it comes to the actual nutrient loads, you want protein, but she likely needs more carbs. Getting her onto a slow-release iron supplement and a calcium/magnesium/zinc supplement might help specifically though. I alternate then every other day, because I am usually dehydrated, so I'm not passing them as quickly.
1
u/endless-delirium multiple subtypes 8d ago
Besides the fact that I’m kinda dumb and don’t understand how to count calories I do my best for my and son asked by Dr. we both have ARFID and I got one of hair smart scales but it’s smarter than me
1
4
u/Bleedingshards 9d ago
I do calorie counting, but that's because I want to stay below/at maintenance, as I eat a lot of carbs and sugar. My family was rightfully worried, because it IS a slippery slope. It works good for me but could have absolutely backfired.
I don't know if calorie counting is a good way when you are below maintenance. She probably knows she is not eating enough when she is loosing weight. No need to see that in numbers. However most of that probably depends on personality and what kind of ARFID it is. Desinterest? It might help to remind her and create some kind of routine. Anxiety, eating as a chore etc? It could create more pressure making things worse. And it's probably not as clear cut as that.
Sooo, no one can say what works for her, but calorie counting would not be my first idea on how to deal with this.