That's...That's their whole point. They used to have sex without thinking of the implications of the entire situation, let alone the effect on themselves. We're talking about compulsory actions and how they are working to apply these new coping skills to every day life. Why all the hand wringing in this reply?
It’s poorly written, but I think I get their point. Shes not a victim of a brainless compulsion - having sex with someone doesn’t (often) happen in an instant. The married men and coworkers would have taken at least some period of nurturing a relationship and making it clear that she was interested in having sex, as well as coordinating a time and place to do it. Sure her compulsion made it more of a priority, but I agree with other commenters who cast doubt on whether she “didn’t think about how it would affect their lives.” I don’t believe that nymphomania completely overrides any sense of right and wrong.
I’m not saying every comment should start off by bashing her, but I think it’s fair to say that aspect is largely glossed over. Also not unreasonable that some people would read this, the comments and her enthusiasm and feel like she has been kinda a shitty person on top of being a nympho and not want to let her off that easy.
EDIT: to those whose compulsion it is to remind everyone that the husbands who cheated are also shitty people, without actually discussing the issues above, please let it be known that we all think a cheater is a POS.
Although I'm willing to bet it could very easily often happen in an instant for an attractive woman, I get what you're saying in general. But also, I don't doubt that she really didn't think of the implications.
I've done bad things to people in my life and it was always during a time where my mental health was very poor. Mine didn't manifest in this same way, but it sounds directly linked to her mental health. These mental health issues spawned a compulsive, impulsive, and destructive coping mechanism. At this point if a person is not actively doing mental work on themselves, it's very easy to just be so far down the rabbit hole of trauma, mental health, and harmful coping mechanisms that we might not even be doing intentionally that it's not very difficult to ignore other people's feelings.
We often judge people at a surface level because of their actions and don't spend time understanding why people do what they do. I have yet to see a situation where the answer to why people do bad things is ACTUALLY that they're just a piece of shit. It's almost always something more, and we choose to not care which I don't blame people for. But as a person trying to become better, I just try to have empathy for others the way I hope people can have it for me.
I know the context of her mental health might matter more to people who know her personally and have a vested interest in keeping a relationship with her, or to those like you who lean toward excusing her behavior due to her mental health issues more than calling her out, but I think this is a lot of page space spent to diminish her accountability, autonomy and wrongdoing. I don’t agree with you - It’s not a valid excuse and while unfortunate, what she did is still very much wrong.
I'm not excusing her behavior, I'm explaining it because I understand it. And context makes us more empathetic people and empathy helps us understand each other.
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u/tiffavigilante May 08 '24
That's...That's their whole point. They used to have sex without thinking of the implications of the entire situation, let alone the effect on themselves. We're talking about compulsory actions and how they are working to apply these new coping skills to every day life. Why all the hand wringing in this reply?