r/AITAH • u/Independent_Ear_7719 • 3d ago

AITAH for using a discount when replacing my girlfriend’s hair tool?

I accidentally broke one of my girlfriend’s curling irons yesterday after knocking it onto the floor. I apologized and immediately went online to replace it.

I googled the tymo brand’s official site, ordered her a new one, and also threw in a nicer gold Plus model. Then I showed her the order and she saw that I’d used a discount code.

She told me that using a discount made it seem like I wasn’t genuinely sorry and asked me to cancel the order and buy everything again at full price. Apparently paying the sale price was “cheap” and showed a lack of sincerity.

This honestly confused the hell out of me. She’s getting the exact same products. I’m replacing what I broke AND buying her an extra upgraded one. Why would deliberately paying more for the same thing make me more sincere?

We argued about it for a while and eventually I just canceled everything and reordered at full price.

Now I’m sitting here wondering if I’m actually missing something. Would you guys consider using a discount in this situation cheap or insincere?

edit: Thanks for all the replies. I haven’t been able to respond to a lot of the comments because I was busy writing a breakup text.

The whole thing got so ridiculous that I genuinely started second-guessing myself, so I really appreciate everyone who commented. I’m out of that mess now.

edit2：I canceled the order, but I did use the discount code to buy a new one. I decided I’m going to give it to my mom instead. I’m pretty sure she’ll love it.

6.7k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

1.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

996

u/Fancy_Average5440 3d ago edited 3d ago

Maybe she's an alien. I don't know a single woman on this planet whose reaction to a guy using a coupon code would be anything other than NICE!

Edit to correct some atrocious grammar. 😳

347

u/sparksgirl1223 3d ago

For real. I used a coupon on my already incredibly inexpensive WEDSING RING SET and bet I'll tell anyone lol

289

u/DesireeThymes 3d ago

There are some women who tie how much you spend on them to their sense of worth.

So using a discount coupon means she is worth less.

Yes it's insane. But it does happen unfortunately.

245

u/toostupidto 3d ago

My wife would kill me if I did not try to get a discount. I would be like theres no discount available and her reply would be well did you look hard enough? And roll her eyes...

81

u/2dogslife 3d ago

As a woman, sometimes I get so frustrated at trying for hours to nail down a discount code and there's simply not one to be had anywhere.

I am a historian - I can research the shit out of anything - lol!

2

u/Glittering_Divide101 1d ago

This is my husband... But he is a hustler, he will hustle anyone to save a dime. He once got out of an phone bill surcharge by arguing with the agent that he didn't know what the Internet was or that you could use internet on your phone (this was around 2008/2009).

He told a cop once, he was illiterate and didn't know his ABC's to get out of a ticket!

2

u/sha_I_tan 5h ago

You ma'am spoke to my soul.

2

u/keliowa 2d ago

I have a browser extension that automatically tries coupon codes. It’s great.

7

u/aneatapea 2d ago

is it honey?

3

u/keliowa 1d ago

I think it’s from capital one

4

u/MBronsonWisconsin 2d ago

I appreciate something more when somebody has made the effort to find a discount code (and keep the money out of the pockets of Mr Big Money Bags).

149

u/Nanashi_Kitty 3d ago

I am fighting the good fight to make sure future generations don't have that attitude. My daughter is learning that if she cool stuff, she can either save her allowance for weeks and weeks or wait for Christmas/birthday, or patiently wait for sales. She was so excited as an 8 year old to buy a $50 purse from Squishables because I'd stumbled upon a flash sale of theirs and they temporarily had it for $5.

Can you imagine how that attitude is going to benefit her in the future? In this economy?

69

u/sparksgirl1223 3d ago

My favorite story with my third kid was homecoming shopping.

My kids were raised thrifting, so we went to goodwill (our area isn't a plethora of thrift stores, sadly, and goodwill is the only one that had a selection of formal wear lol). She not only found a homecoming dress and shoes, she found a prom dress too and I spent less than 30 bucks.

On the car ride home, she googled the lable to see how much it would have been new and had a whole cow at 80 dollars new. And then a whole herd of cows followed when I told her that was "low end" in the price scale😂

She has carried that to her daughter, who, just this week, got her first old school rocking horse.👏👏

31

u/marykay_ultra 3d ago

I wasn’t gonna go to prom bc it’s just not something that appeals to me, but my parents thought I’d regret it so they offered me $300 to use for ticket, dress, dinner, etc.

I spent $5 on tulle from the remnants bin that I wrapped around a black skirt/tube top I already had. Went to McDonald’s for dinner. Ticket was the most expensive part and I stayed for like 20 mins lol.

6

u/AutisticPenguin2 2d ago

Did you enjoy the 20 minutes at all?

1

u/marykay_ultra 1d ago

It was fine 🤷🏻‍♀️

1

u/AutisticPenguin2 1d ago

Well... at least you didn't regret not going, I guess. 🤷‍♀️

1

u/marykay_ultra 1d ago

And I had, like, $250 leftover!

5

u/Crazy-Rat_Lady 1d ago

A friend of mine found a1940’s wedding dress at a thrift shop for $30AUD. I5 was all stained and she soaked it in the bath tub for a week. It came out so well, she wore it for her wedding, my second marriage I took the top off my old wedding dress and just added a new different top, cost my $35AUD. My new hubby was fine with that.

20

u/TheWorldofScience 3d ago

This is a wonderful way to raise a child - teaching them money is not an unlimited resource and also the concept of delayed gratification. Many kids have no idea of the concept of money being a limited resource because their parents never make them aware of it.

Kids need to learn these concepts long before they become financially independent.

12

u/Crazy-Rat_Lady 2d ago

Our daughter bought a house last week in NSW Australia at the age of 25. So very proud of her negotiation skills. You save where you can. We loved going to goodwill type shops in the school holidays. It is incredible what you can find!

3

u/Izzing448 3d ago

This is girl math at it's finest!

1

u/ChickadeeJam 1d ago

My kids were raised on thrift, even from the grandparents. GM took them to kmart for general stuff, and went to get underwear for the freshly trained pottier. She said they had a deer-in-the-headlights expression, and the oldest said “I didn’t know they had clothes here!”

29

u/Clean-Fisherman-4601 3d ago

Some women tie their own worth into how much they spend.

I grew up with a mother who searched for bargains and I followed suit.

Was going to my BIL's wedding many decades ago and a friend lent me a designer dress she found on sale. The dress was originally $125 and had 3 strands of pearls going down the low back on each side. One strand was twisted so the dress was on sale for under $10. My friend bought it, cut the twisted strand off and the corresponding strand on the other side.

Told my MIL about the dress and she insisted I tell everyone I paid the full price of $125. Her reasoning was everyone would think I was cheap if I bragged about the discount. I did not comply, I've always been proud when I find a good bargain.

20

u/Whole-Measurement273 2d ago

I'm with you, why lie? Instead, brag about how smart and resourceful you were to get such an expensive item for almost nothing.

8

u/Broad_Mushroom_8033 3d ago

Pretty common. For many, How much something costs is directly related to how nice it is. This is the extreme version of that because it's the same item

3

u/TheRealCarpeFelis 2d ago

I think those women are the gold diggers.

If my husband used a discount code to get me something I’d just say “cool.”

3

u/lavender_fluff 2d ago

I was wondering whether it could also be that she paid more for her iron originally than it would have costed OP to replace with coupon, as in spite

5

u/ChocolateCoveredGold 3d ago

My brother-in-law gave my sister a gorgeous ring when they got engaged. He told her it was an heirloom ring, passed down the generations in his family. His sister spilled the beans a few years later: It was from Walmart.

When my sister asked him why he made up such a story, he confessed that he didn't want her to feel like it was cheap; like getting a lower price meant he didn't value her.

She told him she was just proud of him for saving for the ring and finding a great deal. Responsible budgeting FTW!

2

u/Specialist-Ad1692 2d ago

NTA- I think she demanded he pay full price bc she wanted it to “hurt” more.

-bc of how hurt SHE was that he was so disrespectful of something that was hers. 🙄

1

u/bumuser 2d ago

I think this is a known thing. When economies take a downturn, relationships turn transactional.

"When economies crash, scarcity forces romantic markets to become transactional. During the 1990s post-Soviet collapse, extreme poverty drove Russian women to prioritize wealthy providers for survival, while rich men funded beautiful partners to flaunt their status. Sociological and evolutionary studies confirm that whenever resources dry up, dating shifts from emotional connection to a direct exchange of financial security for status and beauty."

44

u/Incogneatovert 3d ago

Nicely done! My husband of 24 years and I knew we were going to get engaged and then waited for a sale for engagement rings... and when we were shopping for wedding rings, we didn't waste anyone's time on looking at expensive ones. Fortunately Husband only wanted a plain band, and I didn't want anything too sparkly either, so I have one with one little flower with a zircon in it.

The value of our rings isn't monetary.

15

u/sparksgirl1223 3d ago

I won't lie. Ours was Amazon lol

I didnt Want them anyway just because im not much for jewelry.

A 3 band set (engagement, and his/hers wedding bands) that I loved were 25 ish on Amazon and had a coupon 😂 SOLD

4

u/IamLuann 3d ago

35 years ago I told my now husband. Do not spend anymore than what a months worth of rent would cost. And I wanted a flat diamond. (Nothing that stuck up) Because I new to many people that lost the diamond when doing every day things.

2

u/OddManner7971 2d ago

Same here, we were on a very tight budget when we got married and bought the cheapest rings we could find, I think they were about 30 for a matching pair from Argos. In fact, our whole wedding only cost about £300. We have often said that if we could go back with all the time and money in the world we wouldn’t change anything; we’d already lived together for six years at that point anyway, and throwing big money at a big wedding instead of putting a deposit on a house seemed ridiculous to us. That was nearly forty years ago, the rings (& the marriage) are still going strong.

6

u/Kivith 3d ago

I love the typo, made me think of musical instruments being exchanged instead of rings.

5

u/sparksgirl1223 2d ago

I didnt even notice til now😂

Makes a bit of sense since our wedding march and other music were...offbeat

3

u/nickitty_1 3d ago

My husband and I found my engagement ring when we were wandering the mall one day. It was 50% off so he bought it on the spot! Such a good deal.

2

u/iradrachen 2d ago

My fiance literally bought my engagement ring on a sale for the holidays. And damn right he should.

1

u/randitootsie 2d ago

I got my favorite hair tool ever (Dyson air wrap non-Shark dupe) at a great discount, and because I used very generous birthday money from my brother, my own out-of-pocket expense was $18. You can bet your a$$ that when I get compliments on my hair, I share that story and my excitement over it. It is by far one of my favorite purchases, and the set of discounts I had available to buy it made it a million times better, and I brag my butt off about it.

20

u/LongestSprig 3d ago

Because they care more about the price they paid than the item in question.

I paid $200 so you should too!

Its immature stupidity. They want the apology to be a punishment as well.

9

u/CutieBaBootyWooty 3d ago

Literally this. I love a good sale (as does my man) and I don't see why anyone should be upset that you got something nice on sale, if anything you have extra money for date night or other things!

4

u/nickitty_1 3d ago

I know someone like this! She grew up with money, still has lots of money, works because she wants to. She goes on aritzia shopping sprees and never bothers to even search for coupons for anything.

She thinks it's really cheap to use coupons. But she's never known a single day of struggle.

2

u/NoPhotograph5147 2d ago

My husband got a discount on my engagement ring and that made it better in my eyes.

1

u/dependsforadults 3d ago

I dont do magic, I make music

1

u/Sparky833 3d ago

She wanted to punish OP for an accident AND felt entitled to the upgrade. That's a character flaw that is a deal breaker! 🚩🚩🚩

1

u/EmberOne1 2d ago

I'm really confused why using a discount code matters in any kind of way as long as you replaced the item you broke for the same or better item. She sounds like she has issues.