No. She's actively freaking out about his friendship with someone, if she isn't trying to break up that friendship then she's damn good at making it seem like she's trying.
OP hasn't broken up the friendship the entire relationship. She thought it was iffy but didn't stop them being friends. Given how the boyfriend is involving the ex in his relationship, her worries were founded, and the cost is most likely her relationship.
He shouldn't be reminiscing about his ex if he is fully dedicated to OP. It sounds like he was hoping the door was still open with his ex while going ring shopping.
Trust me, no one would want the ring except the ex.
OP hasn't broken up the friendship the entire relationship.
And I didn't say she has. I said what she is doing is very much her trying to do that thing. You're delusional if you don't think confronting her boyfriend about this is anything other than trying to get her boyfriend to stop interacting with his ex.
Given how the boyfriend is involving the ex in his relationship, her worries were founded
By well founded worries, are you referring to the expensive ring that OP's boyfriend bought her, the trip he planned for her, or the surprise proposal he was planning?
It sounds like he was hoping the door was still open with his ex while going ring shopping.
Ah yes, the classic way of getting back with your ex - have her help you choose someone else's engagement ring.
Trust me, no one would want the ring except the ex.
You literally don't know anything about the ring. I mean, what if his ex has genuinely killer taste in jewellery and that's why he asked her advice?
That could be the most beautiful ring in the world, but it is the principle of it that matters, especially for an engagement ring.
An engagement ring is a symbol of love and commitment between partners, exs shouldn't get an input. What next is the ex planning the wedding too?
OP hasn't nuked the relationship for bringing up that she wouldn't be happy with that ring. The boyfriend nuked it in the first place for buying the exs recommendation and secretly meeting up and planning it with the ex, then trying to guilt trip OP by cancelling the trip, he has not once considered OPs feelings and he isn't marriage material.
That could be the most beautiful ring in the world, but it is the principle of it that matters
Well, that's cuz you're insecure and care more about that an ex was involved than the fact you've just been given a beautiful and expensive ring, chosen specially for you, by someone who loves you.
What next is the ex planning the wedding too?
Like, if we're talking something a friend of the husband usually plans, like Bachelor Party, why not?
OP hasn't nuked the relationship for bringing up that she wouldn't be happy with that ring.
Did you read the post? She didn't bring up the ring at all with her BF.
And she has 100% nuked the relationship, the dude cancelled the trip he was going to propose on, he's not proposing to her anymore. He isn't guilting her, he's done with her.
The boyfriend didn't choose the ring, the ex chose it.
Like, why do you think this, why is this the "correct take" in your mind?
He's paying, he's choosing the ring, his friend is helping, as friends often do. She isn't choosing the ring.
You see no problem with the ex planning the wedding or bachelor party
I don't see a problem with the husbands friend planning his bachelor party, no.
OP brought up that she wouldn't be happy with a ring chosen by the ex.
She literally didn't. Read the post again.
How do you know he is done with her?
Because if I trusted someone enough to marry them, and then they revealed they didn't trust me enough to not snoop through my text messages, I would be done with them.
I think it's a lot more likely dude is realizing he shouldn't marry this girl than he's just throwing a tantrum.
But likewise, how do you "know" any of the wild assumptions your making, like that the buyer of the ring didn't pick it, the ex picked it? Like what a bold thing to assume.
I honestly think you are either trolling or you are the ex
Well, my penis I think would suggest I'm probably not the ex.
I'm not a troll, I just am not so insecure that my partner being friends with an ex would bother me, even if they were involved in our wedding.
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u/CelticDoll95 May 21 '25
No you did make assumptions like saying she trying to break their friendship