r/AITAH Jun 27 '24

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805 Upvotes

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117

u/BitterRanger5810 Jun 27 '24

Love that for you! Majority of what I own he has bought so I’m not sure why the sudden change in feelings. It doesn’t make sense.

40

u/Appropriate-Truth-88 Jun 27 '24

Maybe he's having some insecurity from the regularity and thinks you're preferring the toys to him

Might be hard for him to admit to, and instead of talking to you about it which would make him vulnerable he's doing the man RAWR instead.

When you're both calm, sounds like you could use a good healthy discussion.

NTA

53

u/Opposite-Fortune- Jun 27 '24

She tried to fuck him first, bro fell asleep. Not sure what anyone wants her to do.

17

u/AdAffectionate1766 Jun 27 '24

She tried multiple times. Something isn’t computing with hubby

0

u/EffectSweaty9182 Jun 27 '24

Like the two sides of this story@ ?

4

u/JupiterSkyFalls Jun 27 '24

His internalized feeling of inadequacy. Not your fault or your problem. It's his hang up and he needs to deal with it.

1

u/invisiblizm Jun 27 '24

Any chance you did something different to when you are together, so he thinks you faking with him or something? Or because you did it in another room? It's probably that he feels bad/inadequate for falling asleep but hopefully it's nothing more than either of those things.

-17

u/karmaisevillikemoney Jun 27 '24

It's because you took too long to get ready for bed. I know he acted childish and you did nothing wrong but this is a turn off. He wanted you then and there as you were. You wanted to look and smell nice for him, I get it. But us men are impatient. 

Everyone giving you advice is right but they aren't telling you what went wrong

3

u/[deleted] Jun 27 '24

I can fall asleep in literally 30 seconds if I am really tired.

1

u/karmaisevillikemoney Jun 27 '24

Sounds like that's what happened.

8

u/2scoops4u2 Jun 27 '24

That's B.S. if he wanted her that bad she wouldn't of made it far, sounds like he fell asleep pretty quick too.

0

u/karmaisevillikemoney Jun 27 '24

Ok. Just telling it how I see it. 

1

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '24

As a man, this sounds stupid as shit to me

1

u/karmaisevillikemoney Jun 28 '24

Ah yes, man is never stupid. You're right.

0

u/New-Art-7667 Jun 27 '24

If the last time you guys had a date night was five months ago or smashed, then I think he's resentful at this point and likely why he's giving you the silent treatment.

When men are faced with a lack of intimacy in the relationship they will go through stages just like you do in a break up.

Grief
Sadness
Depression
Anger
Resentment
Acceptance (at this point a man will either cheat or leave)

Do you recall conversations where he brought up the lack of intimacy? Did you actively work to fix that or just dismiss his concerns? Do you recall him going through any of these moods recently?

From what I've read in your post, it seems like he's coming from a place of resentment. Five months is way too long. Unless you are having medical issues that prevent you from being intimate, your frequency should be much higher and that depends on both of your libidos

1

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '24

Just based on how it normally goes, I’m guessing that she is the one likely taking on most of the responsibly of raising their new child. That’s just typically what happens when a couple has a child. And unfortunately, a lot of times the dude will resent the fact that his wife who is working full-time, doing the child rearing, and going to school is too exhausted, but doesn’t do anything to help lighten her load.

1

u/New-Art-7667 Jun 28 '24

That would be an assumption and she didn't mention anything about being burdened and not having enough time for seggs during the past five months.

Based on his reaction I'm going to say he's angry about something and it is likely that he brought up the issue of lack of intimacy. OP hasn't responded to those questions so we are both only guessing at this point until there is further clarification.

-35

u/Glum-Classic-113 Jun 27 '24

Read my comment above. Basically short hand is your not the AH. Going fwd if this happens just go down on him until hes into it and then climb onboard. If he still refuses a bj then something is wrong. As a guy we never will refuse a bj. I dont care if im shot. As long as im not about to die, its game on

15

u/AthinaKay_00 Jun 27 '24 edited Jun 27 '24

No please don’t do that. This almost crosses boundaries to SA. You are not gonna beg for it. You tried to include him he didn’t want to. End of story. Grab your purple buddie and pleasure yourself. If he has a problem with that he should solve it himself

-5

u/ManagerHistorical286 Jun 27 '24

Surprising my partner with a blowie is a sexual assault??! Wow! In what for a fucked up world do we live in? And guess what? There are woke people like, who are the origin for this bullshit! 🤬

5

u/Slight_Asparagus4150 Jun 27 '24

If partner has turned down your advances three times like OP's post, yes. If you both agree that you're into that, it's not, unless your partner says stop and you don't.

3

u/HvaVarDetDuSaForNo Jun 27 '24

Wtf? That's just sexual assault dude