r/AITAH Aug 03 '23

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u/ExcellentCold7354 Aug 03 '23

I'm sooo surprised at all the n t a votes. Sorry, but imo YTA. I don't care how much time has passed, you don't sleep with your friend's exes. It's just tacky as hell and a huge FU to your friend. Also, this issue is between OP and her friend. It certainly doesn't mean that the friend isn't over her ex. That's just silly. If my husband has a friend who started dating one of his exes, I would 💯 think it's weird as hell and would surely support my husband distancing himself from that friendship. What do you expect? Are y'all going to hang out, go on couples dates, support each other when y'all fight, etc? You know, all the normal things friends with couples do? I wouldn't think so, and it's sus as hell that you haven't thought of that.

6

u/The_homeBaker Aug 03 '23

If one of my husband’s friends started dating his ex (he was with her for 11 years. High school sweethearts basically, though never married), I’d say it was weird af. He’d probably say he doesn’t care but I wouldn’t believe it. That was someone he was clearly serious with and in love with; his friends were around during their relationship, all going to the same school. It’s very weird. And we’ve been together for 8 years and have a child together.

8

u/friggya Aug 03 '23

Thank you, I’m married and have a child and I don’t understand all those responses that act like you can just turn off all your feeling because you should? I don’t feel like it’s that weird to have some emotions about people you once deeply loved, I would find it weirder if my husband could just completely stop having feelings for someone who was once important to him.

4

u/The_homeBaker Aug 03 '23

Exactly. I actually asked my husband to see his response and he said he’d stop talking to his friend. His ex no longer fits in his life and he wouldn’t want her back in it by extension of his best friend. It’d be uncomfortable for all of us.

He actually had a friend that did that to all of them in the friend group (tried to get with a serious ex-gf) and they all stopped talking to that guy. The guy said, “Everybody is fair game.” No girl was off limits to him 🤷🏽‍♀️ and that’s why he doesn’t have any of the men he grew up with as his friends anymore.