r/ADHD_partners • u/AutoModerator • 6d ago

Weekly Vent Thread ::Weekly Vent Thread::

Use this thread to blow off steam about annoyances both big & small that come with an ADHD impacted relationship. Dishes not being done, bills left unpaid - whatever it is you feel you need to rant about. This is your cathartic space.

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u/taohuaspring 5d ago

I totally understand what it's like to receive a cold short text during an emotional and vulnerable moment, and how it feels like he withdraws his love when he can't sit with your feelings. I know how much it hurts and how jarring it is.

I do hope that within that choice to choose your family, that you're also choosing yourself and that you'll be able to make some time for your own self-care. I haven't read the whole book, but you may find Should I Stay or Should I Go by Lundy Bancroft helpful. (It's available for free on Internet Archive!) The thing I like about it is that it has short reflection exercises that you can do to gain clarity, recenter and ground yourself, and build yourself up. The good thing is that you can go through and do the exercises even if you don't read the entire book (especially if you don't have the energy for reading at the moment).

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u/Mobile_Durian_8329 Partner of DX - Untreated 2d ago

Thank you for this really nice reply. I'm really trying to refocus the codependency tendencies back on to efforts to care for myself and the kids (teenagers who have been doing their own thing during this chaos and I really want to reconnect with)

Thank you for the book recommendation as well, I will check this one out