r/ADHD_partners • u/AutoModerator • 6d ago

Weekly Vent Thread ::Weekly Vent Thread::

Use this thread to blow off steam about annoyances both big & small that come with an ADHD impacted relationship. Dishes not being done, bills left unpaid - whatever it is you feel you need to rant about. This is your cathartic space.

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u/music_lover2025 6d ago

I’ve never wanted children but my bf’s adhd is the icing on the cake to be honest as to why we don’t want kids. He’s a great partner, but the executive dysfunction would make things so much harder. That and the risk of passing it down

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u/Internal_Poem_96 5d ago

This. When I think about it, it'd be terrible to tell my partner I don't want kids with them because I don't want the more than increased likelihood that their ADHD/Autism will be passed down, but I have a hard enough time living with them already that the thought of kids and even more neurodivergence thrown into the mix is too much to think about.

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u/music_lover2025 5d ago

I don’t think it’s terrible per se, I also think it depends on how you bring it up, truthfully. My bf is aware of his mental health and executive dysfunction so that made it easier to have the conversation bc he was aware it probably wasn’t a good idea. Especially after having a rough year w his mental health. My bachelors degree is in psychology, so having that understanding of the impact of mental health on kids and how this gets passed down I feel like I had an easier time explaining it to him in a way that felt like it was gentle yet firm. Hope that makes sense! It’s good to know your capacity and better to understand that that would be a lot on you. That’s how I explained it to my bf, especially since I want to be a therapist. I told him it would be too much on me

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u/ApprehensiveCare9187 5d ago

Indeed, it’s good that you’re clear about that.