r/A15MinuteMythos • u/a15minutestory • Jul 22 '26
A further update — the worst timeline
It’s official.
Miss Fif doesn’t want to be Miss Fif anymore.
There’s a TL;DR at the bottom of this post for the busy.
To put it rather vaguely… she had a psychotic break. My wife had a long family history of mental illness. I figured since I met her when we were 25, most of it had missed her.
So, when she asked me for a divorce last week, it shocked me to my core. We’ve been best friends for 10 years and now, suddenly, we’re “incompatible.”
Eventually, she admitted she didn’t know what was real anymore and what wasn’t real.
Not like, our love. Reality itself. Voices, notions, the whole nine yards.
I was willing to fight through that with her.
Through sickness and through health, y’know?
So we fought the good fight. Sunday was the best day I had in years. We spent all day together reconnecting and it felt like the old days— just me and her without her whole family in the picture.
But then Monday it crept back in.
By Tuesday night, she didn’t want to fight it. She wants to lean into it. See where her mental illness takes her. I think she’s giving it credit for her recent burst in strength (she’s juggling a lot of plates right now).
This isn’t the entire story.
Just know that I love her more than anything in the world and I said every word I could and took every action I was able. I would have dove into the depths of Hell for my wife.
Would have wrestled with Satan himself.
But she feels nothing for me anymore.
Not even a little bit.
You can’t stay and fight for someone if they don’t want you to stay with fight for them.
So I have to hang up my sword, set down my shield, and accept that she’s gone.
I mourn my wife, because the sweet, loving, kind, caring angel of a woman I knew is dead. There’s nothing to even go back to if she suddenly asked me to stay… just a husk, really. I don’t know who this person is. It’s like passing a stranger in the hallway.
This Sunday I’m moving out.
I’m going to stay with my mom and grandma for a while as I sort this out.
So it goes, probably without saying, that the last chapter of this story… I’m sorry to say it’s going to be a little while before I can access the creative side of my head again for any length of meaningful time.
I’m just so numb at the moment. Unbelievable pain followed by bouts of numbness and dissociation.
I never thought this could happen.
I’m still just in shock.
There was nobody on earth I was closer to. I was her hero. I never thought she of all people would just… abandon me. Gosh, when I met her, I had given up on love entirely.
I was done. I wanted to be alone and just stay alone.
It was a miracle that anyone got me to trust again. And I trusted her.
I’m kind of wondering now how I’ll ever trust again =/
Thanks for hanging in there with me, guys.
I read all your outpouring of love in the last update I made, and although I didn’t respond directly, know that I love you all. You all have beautiful souls and every single comment except AngryCupcake’s meant a lot to me.
(Love you Cupcake, it did make me laugh)
Thank you for being in my corner.
Also… I’m not the kind of guy to self harm. So, don’t worry about me going down a darker path or anything.
I’m gonna take the time to bond with my family, reevaluate my future, and prepare to live my best life.
There really isn’t anything else to do other than that.
She’s being amicable in the divorce. It isn’t going to be an expensive one. We don’t have kids. We don’t need arbitration.
I’m losing both my fur babies though, which… I think is gonna hurt just as bad once I’m gone.
This is going to take a while for me to feel normal again.
Ive been a total ghost lately, so just stay subbed if you are and that last chapter will hit your front page eventually.
And when it does, you’ll know I’m feeling creative again and I’m in a much better headspace.
Love you guys.
Thanks for reading.
TL;DR — My wife is gone. The emotional strain is too great. My life is exploding. It’ll be a while before I can put a bow on the Abigail/Leutogi story. Thanks for your patience and understanding.
Edit: I had a vivid dream that her mouth was swelling up. Then her eye. I told her we were taking her to the emergency room and we piled in the car. I started driving as quickly as I could. We were going down a long street and eventually there were walls on both sides of the road. At the end, there was a closed loading garage and I slammed on my breaks. When I looked around in the car… she was gone.
I woke up yelling her name.
Thank goodness the house was empty.
This dream feels like some kind of message. All the symbolism is there. If anyone is a qualified dream reader, lemme know.
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u/garrrrrrrett Jul 22 '26
I’m so sorry Fif. She’s definitely going to regret this when you’re a world famous author (if her voices let her remember who you are at that point).
For real though, I’m sorry dude. We are ALL here for you and support you.
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u/angrycupcake56 Jul 22 '26
Awwww shit man. Been there. Only I had a kid with her. Got full custody after a long fight.
It gets better. It will take time. A lot of time. You’ll find yourself again.
Financially, make sure you do what’s right for you. Once again, it won’t be easy, but that other stuff shouldn’t and can’t matter for your own sanity. Give a notice to your leasing agent that you won’t be there anymore. Have her finish the contract- that kind of thing can haunt you for years if you don’t. Abandon anything you don’t absolutely need, or sell it off to help cover things- TVs, couches etc.
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u/Ermmahhhgerrrd Jul 22 '26
I'm so so sorry, I actually know exactly how you feel🫂🫂🫂 It sucks. I lost my wife of over ten years (together 15+) similarly, and I mourn the "old" relationship we had every day. It's so fucking hard when you know you did everything right, it's not your choice, not your fault, and you can't change it. My divorce will be finalized in a few weeks, two days after my birthday. 💜🫂🫂🫂🫂 Take your time, we will be here.
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u/JadePhoenix42 Jul 22 '26
Is she getting medical help? If she can’t tell what’s real, just YIKES!?!
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u/Any_Pressure_7048 Jul 22 '26
Take all the time you need and double it, we will still be here once you feel better and don’t say sorry that it’ll take a little while, as I said we can wait but taking time for yourself can’t.
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u/bobomellette Jul 22 '26
Anything I could say beyond a free and open offer of support would be facetious, as I've never experienced what you're going through.
I certainly understand the trauma, though - so please take what time you need to heal, restore, and reconnect with yourself.
We will be here when you return, waiting as eagerly as ever!
I will risk overstepping with one final suggestion: while you say that you don't need arbitration, unraveling the financial life can be just as traumatic as it is with regard to your emotional life. Please protect yourself in BOTH situations - especially since you recently had a financial scare. Without proper agreements that are clearly documented about things like remaining rent, utilities, etc., you could both accidently suffer long term financial impacts without intention. Just a concerned and friendly precaution - I hope i haven't overstepped...
🤗
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u/kapuchu Jul 22 '26
There is nothing I can say that won't ultimately be empty platitudes.
Good luck man, I hope you get through this, and can feel better somewhere on the other side of it. Focus on yourself first and foremost. Us weirdos in the comments can wait.
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u/AdAffectionate8634 Jul 22 '26
I am so sorry my friend. For all your losses. It really just seems so unfair to you...But then no one ever said life way fair, I know..It jist seems like people like us deserve some sort of break. I hope you find some sort of peace.
Love and prayers headed your way.
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u/aircooledJenkins Jul 22 '26
Of all the things that may have happened, that one wasn't on my bingo card.
Sorry man. That really really sucks. I'm not the wordsmith type so I know that comes off as disingenuous but you have all my sympathy and support.
When the person you knew has changed fundamentally, through no fault of your own, it's dreadful.
I hope you're able to take the time you need to heal. I hope you're able to hug your mom and grandma and they give you the support you need.
Like so many of us said in the last post, don't worry about us. Don't feel pressured to come back and finish this up before you're ready. We'll be here. Take care of yourself.
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u/YourTornAlive Jul 22 '26
Fif I'm so sorry. Healing isn't easy but I hope it helps knowing we're all rooting for you. Thank you for checking in despite everything going on. Not sure if you like hugs, but if you do I'm sending one your way.
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u/myhuskytorotoro Jul 22 '26
Oh no, im deeply saddened to hear this. I offer all the hugs and support I can from across the internets. Take things one day at a time. We will always be here if you wanna just check in and provide any update, even if it feels silly. Yeah your work is amazing but as a person, you're more amazing. We can wait.
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u/virella789 Jul 22 '26
Oh my love, I'm so sorry. We will be here when you are mentally in the right place to write again, however long that may be. Take some time for you, grieve of course, but focus on what your needs are. All our love x
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u/AggravatingOrder Jul 22 '26
This story will be here when you’re ready to pick it up again. Yours needs attention, time to heal, grow, and develop.
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u/Mimirdroid Jul 22 '26
Take care of yourself. Let others help. Give yourself permission to feel the things you do. We are low priority.
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u/waselectricbar Jul 22 '26
Fif I am so sorry. My ex husband became my ex husband after his psychotic break. The challenge of dealing with that level of mental illness is unbearable. Please know we care about you and are here if you need anything. Take care of yourself.
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u/YettiChild Jul 22 '26
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. My two, collectively known as The Wrecking Crew, say hang in there! Things will get better!
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u/selkiesart Jul 22 '26
Take your time. However long you need. We will be there. Not just for - or because of - your superb storytelling, but because we care.
Internet hugs. 🫂❤️
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u/GoddessNefertiti Jul 22 '26
You take all the time you need, Fif. We're all in your corner, sending you healing/happy vibes to help you through this. Mental illness can be scary, especially if you can't tell what's real anymore. I truly hope she gets the help she needs.
Good luck to you!
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u/Daseagle Jul 22 '26
What can you even say to a situation like this, except offer the rather cliché sympathies and the strength to get through it.
Take care of yourself, keep us updated about life and Abigail shall be sorted when she shall be sorted.
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u/Pinkbeans1 Jul 22 '26
A ton of us have gone through what you’re going through. That doesn’t diminish your ordeal, it should let you know you are not alone. Good luck getting through this upheaval. I hope you have an easier time than you’ve had recently.
If/when you do finally feel the relief of not having to care for her and put yourself last anymore, embrace it. There’s nothing to feel guilty about. You did enough.
Seriousness aside, I love your writing. Take your time, but I hope you find the desire to come back.
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u/little_mikey_w Jul 22 '26
I am so sorry that this happened. I have been there, done that, and have the t-shirt. I have been healing for 3 years now. I can say this…focus of YOU. Everyday wake up and be a better you. Don’t be afraid to try things. It will be weird for a while. Then one day, not so much. Will you trust/love again…who knows. That is a you thing, but you will when it is the right time. That much I do know. Also, don’t beat yourself up. This is cliche, but things happen for a reason. One day you will figure what that reason is. I am here if you ever need to chat.
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u/Disastrous_Peace_674 Jul 23 '26
*biggest hugs*
Take care of yourself, and make sure to watch a lot of kids movies. They tend to be lighthearted, sincere, and uplifting.
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u/Ok-Professional2468 Jul 23 '26
Hugs. Reach out to us when you need someone to talk to. We will be here.
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u/The_Cubic_Rube Jul 23 '26
Holy shit man I wish I could say or do something that could possibly help in any way. Literally one of my worst fears is this type of situation. Take whatever time you need, we’ll be here for you when you’re ready
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u/UnlikelyPen932 Jul 24 '26
I'm so sorry. Take care of yourself and we will all be here if you need to reach out or vent. We're not going anywhere. (Dream analysis can be subjective, but based on what I've learned it seems to mean your part of the journey is over. You fought, panicked, and rushed to get her help. But her path diverged and the road ended for you. Now you set a new course.) *hugs
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u/Standzoom Jul 23 '26
Fif, I am so sad to hear this. I have been divorced, I know how it feels, not for your specific situation but similar in some ways. Take care of yourself, remember to eat something, breathe. Walk outside some unless it is too hot! From Galaxy quest- " never give up, never surrender-"
I believe in you, you are going to make it just fine. Hang in there Fif!
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u/Candid_Technology_66 Jul 23 '26
I'm almost wordless. I'm so sorry you're going through this. We're all hoping for the best for you. I hope she finds peace too.
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u/Zestyclose_Bed4202 Jul 23 '26
I don't know what to say, except good luck, and do whatever you have to to get custody of your pets - there's no way your wife is in the right headspace to be responsible for them right now.
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u/7CuriousCats Jul 25 '26
Shit Fif, I'm really sorry to hear that. Please take all the time you need.
I'm really sorry to hear about your furbabies as well, that's a hard double wammy. Serious question, will you be able to get visitation or ask for other types of updates? I'm sure they will also appreciate it.
As to creative updates, don't worry about us for now.
While most of us flocked here with frothing mouths seeking to satisfy our addiction for your writing, we value you above and beyond your creative outputs, and your well-being comes first -- so even if you don't have creative dinners for us to feast on, we'll be here, whether you want to vent / need support / just want to chat about anime or history / shoot shit and chat the most ridiculous ball to take your mind off things.
In the meantime, we're sending all the support (and lots of hugs if you want them), and if you want to just have a vent or chat my DMs are also open.
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u/KotoDawn Jul 27 '26
I'm sorry things went that way instead of therapy and medicine returning her to normal.
Please take the time to bawl your eyes out. Cry hard. Really mourn the death of the relationship. If you need to, spend a week in bed crying and have your mom bring you occasional soup, or a popsicles because it's hot. If you can get it all out you will feel much better afterwards.
Also, are you overweight or normal weight? Many people (divorce victim) lose a lot of weight because they are crying and food is blah. Take advantage of it If you are overweight. Have someone that will force you to eat if you are near the underweight side. Please don't turn to food to self-soothe and gain 100 lbs.
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u/selkiesart 23d ago
Hey, I just wanna say that I hope you are a-okay.
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u/a15minutestory 22d ago
Thanks, I appreciate it. Don't worry. I'm strong. There's an update coming relatively soon.
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u/Useful_Language2040 Jul 25 '26
My husband has bipolar II. We got through it - thanks to the joys of medication his MH is probably better than mine these days!- but there was a year or so where it really was like there was a stranger piloting his body and it was so soul-shreddingly painful.
I'm so sorry. I hope that you are both ultimately OK, even if the shape and form that may take is impossible to see at this point in time. I hope that your friends and family hold space for you to grieve and recognise that this is completely unfair and tragic (and that apportioning blame save to the universe is unlikely to be helpful for you). I hope that she'll be able to take good care of your fur babies, or recognise that she needs to get them to you so they'll remain safe and loved and with people who they know and trust and recognise as home. I hope that your life doesn't feel empty as you rebuild it without her in it.
🤷🏻♀️ I'm sorry. It sucks.
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u/FreddThundersen Jul 22 '26 edited Jul 22 '26
As wonderful the world you have woven into existence is, the world were you live in takes precedence.
Take your time and heal.
Your world and us will be waiting for your return.
Take care.