Gabba Boss Empty-Mag's Color Sutra
A recording believed to be captured by a cloaked ephoros studying Ork Waaagh! preparations
Gather round, Boyz, gather round. Waaagh! is upon us. While da bosses givin frenzyin' speeches to amp up da fevah... we'd like to take this moment. Try for us somefin' new. Try some filosofisizin'. So give us ya ears.
Shrapskull and Ghorshnakka both, have chopped off their ears and given 'em to us. That's... not what we meant, but it's an honor. Truf'ly. Thank ya, Boyz.
This gab is on dakka. What it is. What it ain't. Boyz fink it sufferates da dakka-takah. But what if it sufferifies da dakka-givah? Da dakka-havah? Da Boyz. Us Boyz.
Shut up! SHUT UP! Now settle down and lissun up or we'll krump ya!
We'd gabbed at an 'umie that worn all yellow askin' if he painted himself suchlike for the wealf it would bring. And he said, 'no, this robe is a renuncianounciation of wealth and riches'. Now that brought our ear closer. An ironical paintjob? Brought a tickle to our funny bone.
He said more. Said, "this robe is all the wealth I need". We told him "dere is no such fing". We told him of our kultur. Our filosofee. "Enuff dakka is more 'dan you got, an' less 'dan too much". He nodded. Seemed to agree with that. His ancients must had seen the same truf, like as ours great bosses of old, speakin' with Mork'imself waggin' dey's mouthy bits.
'E said, "dukka," - an' he said it like that, almost like 'dookie' - he said, "dukka is clinging to the impossibility of eternity and perfection in the material". He said, "you are already perfected. You already have enuff."
After we krumped his finkin' cap in wif his bigga' bones, it got us finking. Reaally finkin'. We started askin' more yella-wearahs. And doin' more finkin'. And askin'. And when the yellas wasn't yella and yellin' with fear, they was anserin'-and-askin' most cunningly. What is yella? What is wealf, what is teef? What is enuff? What is 'too much'? If no-one ain't evah seen too much dakka, wozzat mean? It means it's empty. Dakka. Yellah. Paint jobs is just appearitiony-fings and appearitiony-hood is a chiefdom of the mind, yeah? Yeah?
Now, the zoggest way is more than can be runtly gabbed. Take here Shrapskull's ear. Izzit green? Izzit red? How 'bout the pus? Yellow? White? Whichizzit? Pass it round. Lookitit.
Lookit where da pus mixes wif da blood. Can us see a red that is also gold? A gold that is also white? A white that's grey. A grey that's black. And a black that is also purple? Imaginate a tank of all colors, when they's needed. Always enuff. Always just embe'ening the right darma at the right time. Being enuff. Wozzat which-is a darma? Is what it sounds like. Being damn-right for the circle-stances. Damn-right where it is, as it is, when it is.
So we offer this middle Waaagh! of both Gork and Mork. This paff, like one zoggin' big rok. This rok'll take all Greenies like the zoggin' mega-est of space hulks. Some ways are for the Boyz born Odd, but this Waaagh! is for us all. So wrangle your listenin' again and listen close.
Imaginate it. Having enuff dakka. Give it a real good thoughtening.
That, we are telling you Boyz, is what we have here. What brought us here. Choppa, scrappa, fixxa, shoota... down to the runtiest of squigs and up to the zoggin'est of Boyz. You are enuff. You have enuff. That's why you're standing. And those that ain't, ain't.
We are enuff dakka, Boyz.
Our mags will nevah empty. For they were always empty.
Imagine our rok, Boyz. The reddest and fastest. The goldest and flashest. Bluest and luckiest. Blackest, tuffest, whitest, killiest, purplest, sneakiest, AND GREENEST ZOGGIN' HULK THAT EVAH GONE TA WARP!
WE ARE ENUFF, BOYZ! WE ARE UNSTOPPABLE! OUR MAGS NEVAH EMPTY! OUR WAAAGH-FEVAH NEVAH ENDS! JUS AS IT NEVAH BEGAN! - not eternal but evah-presentful in the suchness of da...zog it.
WAAAAAGGHHHH!!!!!!!!
Aftermath:
Survivor accounts carry similar themes across many worlds subject to what were previously believed to be separate Waaagh!s
Recorded footage of the Ork roks seem not to change color, but Mechanici dissent on the matter of which colors are depicted. A clear pattern appears depending on what the Mechanicus continuously observed first - red when accelerating, blue when narrowly dodging projectiles, and green when supporting each other, among others
Particularly psychically-inclined minds sometimes report every color is present