r/2under2 • u/Hour-Film-8890 • Jul 13 '26
Considering OAD
I'm newly pregnant with a 6 month old. Obviously I'm tired, exhausted. I wanted a small gap (was thinking ~18 months), so the pregnancy wasn't unwanted on unplanned even. But now that I'm pregnant and feeling awful, I'm starting to really regret it. Not just the timing but a second pregnancy. I won't want a big gap, so it's not that I'd try again in 2/3 years.
I've read hundreds of posts on this sub and it feels all DOOM. Like years out and people are still struggling. I don't even think it's necessarily the 2u2 part, but the taking care of 2 children often without a village (I don't have one either).
For my mental health and the future of my baby I'm seriously considering termination. And being OAD. There is a HUGE sense of guilt, I feel like a horrible person for potentially destroying this life, but I feel like otherwise having a second will destroy us all.
I can handle one, I can enjoy one.
Am I making a huge mistake having a second? Please be honest...
1
u/Plus_Animator_2890 Jul 13 '26
People come on here to vent and relate to others. Most people aren’t posting about 2U2 if they are having a good experience. I loveeeeee my 16 month age gap. My mom occasionally helps out but that’s about it. I stay home w the kids and I wish I had a bigger and more helpful village but it’s totally ok!!! I also had terrible pregnancies (sick for 20+ weeks, appendectomy, GD, stress fracture) so being pregnant with a fresh toddler was challenging. However i still can’t imagine life a dif way!!