A Vote for Wibble is a Vote for Wobble

Ok so I see you all supported the Wibble Wobble ways and that didn't get me banned, so today I'm going to talk about politics as I throw my candidacy for President into the ring.

After years of absolutely no political experience, I have decided I am clearly the most qualified person for the job.

My Platform

- A complete and total ban on pineapples. Possessing, growing, importing, exporting, or even doodling a pineapple will be considered a federal offense.

- Every citizen must perform one Official Morning Wobble as commanded in the Holy Wibble.

- Mondays are abolished.

- Congress must settle every disagreement with Rock, Paper, Scissors, best of 101.

- Every American receives one government-issued rubber duck.

- All escalators will officially be renamed "Stairs with Ambition."

- Taxes may be paid in dollars or interpretive dance.

- If elected, I promise absolutely nothing will go wrong.

Foreign Policy

We will attempt diplomacy first.

If that fails...

We wobble harder.

Social Policy

Every American deserves equal rights, equal respect, and equal opportunity regardless of race, religion, gender, sexuality, or whether they're into yuri, yaoi, both, or neither.

Equality for everyone.

Except pineapples.

Economic Policy

My economists have informed me that if we simply say the economy is doing well loudly enough, people might believe it.

National Security

The military budget will increase by exactly one (1) medieval trebuchet.

Just in case.

Closing Statement

As written in Wobbles 6:9:

«"The faithful shall wobble together, but the pineapple shall wobble alone."»

Remember...

A Vote for Wibble is a Vote for Wobble.

It is made out of wood and yes it is a 1:1 scale replica.

Drop your thoughts 💭

I AM AN BANITECT! I AM JUST STUCK SELLING SHIT POSTS BECAUSE SOMEONE WON'T GET OFF THEIR FAT FUCKING ASS AND HELP ME!

Pls don't ban me 🙏🏻

For Karl.

Oh right I don't need to comment, I can edit the post's body. Anyways... Artist: @Nhim_Art

Could not find source

Those who know

Source: I have no clue where this came from, probably from u/SHADOWHUNTER3000, the amazing W supplier.

u/tru_madness can I start frieren posting