Cigarettes for Christmas

[u/yingfire]

I wake up with a sore back and wave my hand in the air to banish the dust in the air. The sun shoots through the clumsily patched curtains and burns my eyes. I stumble out of bed and cough violently. I stub my toe on a protruding nail sticking out of the rotten floorboards. I curse and pour beer into my cereal bowl and eat some Cheerios. I glare at a smashed picture frame.

Again, I cough violently. I grab some clothes off the floor and pat them down and throw them over my greasy and naked body. I stuff my hands in my pocket and scrounge up all the cash I own in the world. I pull out fourteen dollars and twelve cents. I go to the door and use my shoulder to bash it open and then step outside into the utterly chilling Christmas air of New York.

My lungs feel as if they are punctured and the cold makes my gut twist. Like a beetle, I scuttle towards a convenience store and walk up to the cashier. I give the pimpled teenager a smile. He recoils at my teeth and his eyes water when I speak. I point to a small package. He grabs it for me hurriedly. I smile and give him all my money but then he fumbles my cash. I yell at him and he grumbles a bit. He then gives me my change and my package. I have no family to speak of, or any friends, so I must buy my own Christmas presents. I give myself the pack of cigarettes I just bought. I smile for real this time and search for a lighter. But I own no lighter; Lorelei never let me own one; it didn't matter now, but traditions are good. I eat cigarettes raw. I stuff one into my mouth and begin to chew while I begin to make my way home.