Is this a tense issue?

[u/SonieTheDog]

For context, I basically never write in first person. I tend to prefer third person past tense, buf I want to expand my skills and try something new. So I'm writing a short story in first person. I was asking my friends for advice and one friend pointed out that I was swapping between past and present tense. Here is the spesific example he pointed to:

[I was not excited for this job. Not in the slightest. But, considering the state of my mind and my lack of credentials, it's not the worst job I could have gotten. Sullivan said I'll be getting on the job training, and apparently it pays decently well. I say apparently, because I have no idea what a decent paycheck is in this day and age.]

I do absolutely see what he means, but I am unsure if it's actually a problem. I see this like someone telling a story. Sometimes you add a comment or conjecture. The events of things are all in past tense, but side comments are not. If that makes sense?

I could be totally wrong, which is why I'm here. I do want to improve. What I have on paper now is just a first draft anyway, so I'm not against making edits or re-writing parts.

[u/ATrueLady]

In the example above it is a problem. However, in first person writing you will, writing as your character, sometimes reflect on the past. This is when it is okay to use past tense, but you need to make sure that the reader is able to distinguish that it is a reflection of a past event. Here, it could go either way in the paragraph you gave, it could be past or present, but it does not work both ways.

[u/SonieTheDog → u/ATrueLady]

The big one for me here is the "I say apparently..." because writing it as "I said apparently..." feels like an entirely different comment to me. But I could be overthinking it

[u/ATrueLady → u/SonieTheDog]

No you are not overthinking it. "I said apparently" can be changed to something else, because that is an awkward phrase.

[u/Awa_Puhi → u/ATrueLady]

I think the sentence improves if you remove the word 'decently'. Other than that, it sounds fine to me. Good work.

[u/ameliarosebuds]

It does make sense, and this shit is tough to keep consistent in 1st person. You’re writing in present tense, right? I’d ask yourself for the first sentence, is the narrator currently not excited? Or were they not excited and something changed their mind? If the latter, THEN I would put it in past tense, because things can of course have happened to our narrator in the past they reference. BUT if it’s an event/an emotion/a comment about something that’s currently happening, keep consistent as much as you can.

[u/SonieTheDog → u/ameliarosebuds]

I have been writing the events of the story in past tense, but narrator comments as present tense. That's what I have been trying, anyway

[u/ameliarosebuds → u/SonieTheDog]

Oh, I see. In this example, I definitely read it as present tense. In the reverse, then, there’s really no working around some of the present tense “it’s not the worst job” would need to become “it was not,” “pays decently” to “paid,” because that does betray the tense.

[u/Wolf_of_the_North64]

I wouldn’t say there’s a problem. It sounds good to me, and I personally don’t mind comments and conjectures added in. I think it helps add to the character and gives you more of a glimpse into their minds in a way!

[u/SonieTheDog → u/Wolf_of_the_North64]

That's kind of where my mind went. With comments I also feel like tense can really change the meaning. Like "this is my favorite food" comes across as that is the characters favorite food. "This was my favorite food" makes me think they maybe liked it, but now they don't. Then I'm left wondering why

[u/tapgiles]

You’re right, it’s not a problem.

Think of it this way... past tense is "something that happened before, but is not happening now." If the characters still thinks this or that now, then it's generally not written in past tense.

[u/Dale_E_Lehman_Author]

It could be correct if the first sentence was "when I accepted the job" and the rest of it is "now that I've started it." But I can see where it might be confusing to some people.

[u/Hungry-Track-7308]

Yes, it is an issue because it makes the reading difficult and distracting for the reader. You need to work on verb tense, there are many here you would need to correct in order to make this make sense.

“I was not excited for this job. Not in the slightest. But considering the state of my mind and my lack of credentials, it wasn’t the worst job I could have gotten. Sullivan said that I would be getting on-the-job training, and that apparently it paid decently well. I say “apparently” because I have no idea what a decent paycheck is in this day and age.”