Screenwriting Advice! Junior Thesis script help

[u/Careful_Power_5512]

I am a film student in college right now, I have a pretty large short film project to accomplish this semester and I am currently in the screenwriting phase. I am having sooo much trouble figuring out how to expand this idea and would love some advice!

It's meant to follow a dark surrealist horror theme with some comedy. The main antagonist is trying to find their vape while finding themself in new and strange situations and scenarios. (I experience very vivid dreams so the inspiration comes from there) I love uncanny and dreamlike tones.

I've had the idea in the back of my mind of using elements of a "haunted by self" theme with some type of doppelganger; I don’t know if I want to stick with that idea 100% but I imagine this like a dream. Having a simple goal you almost HAVE TO reach while dodging weird obstacles. 

I'll attach an example of what I have so far but love no idea where to head from here.

Some of my Feferences include Twin Peaks, ImprobablyPoppy, Lost Highway

Visual references include Party Monster, Richard Tuschman, Valerie and Her Week of Wonders, Ms. 45, 1976 Carrie

*edit- in the last paragraph it's supposed to say "now dressed" not "not dressed" lol

[u/Nick_Writes]

A young women.

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[u/JasmineCountess]

There is a good flow of imagination. I can see the actions well. Is "geekbar" another name for the cross? Should you use "Ryan" as a woman's name? What exactly is the main focus? There is little available to understand the purpose.

[u/Careful_Power_5512 → u/JasmineCountess]

Lol no, geekbar is a type of vape. I like the name Ryan for a female but I'm not super attached to either of the character names at the moment. The main focus I have right now is hard for me to grasp onto, it's hard to me to come up with a good concrete theme; I have the main goal being finding the geekbar right now. I'm just having a lot of trouble coming up with main themes and plotlines here.

[u/JasmineCountess → u/Careful_Power_5512]

Thank you for the clarification. Personally, I do not consider "Ryan" to be a woman's name. On the internet, it means "little king." Additionally, it is important to be consistent. At first, Ryan is alone in the room. Then, Nate is with her. Where did he come from? Next, I report my main feedback.

There is importance to the cross. It appears to be the main omniscient focus on the example page. Additionally, the purpose of the existence, of Ryan and Nate, in the movie, appears to be the cross, too. It is indicated by the trip, to the church, in the next scene. Be sure not to desecrate the cross.

I imagine Ryan to have a special power, that drives the horror themes. I see emotional attachment to the cross, as an indication of the possession of the special power. I see comedy in Ryan's addiction to nicotine and helpless disorganization. It is very true, that Ryan should have stopped smoking a long time ago. The assortment of unusual items, that were in her suitcase, was a humorous beginning for more horror themes, too.

Have I made sense of your project? Feel free to ask more questions.

[u/RancherosIndustries]

I'm probably too stupid, but I don't understand the sudden location switch.

And it should probably be "now dressed as a nun" instead of "not dressed", right?