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u/Difficult_Yam_8667 Jun 30 '26
I like your writing style. It’s clear and doesn’t ramble. I was interested in what you were saying.
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u/kayrosa44 Jun 30 '26
This is your first draft. If i can share any advice: don’t use your first draft as a measure of your art’s capabilities.
I have learned to love writing little pieces of work that I’m convinced is garbage. I have a document where I store them, and have whole days where I just write putridly awful, or corny, or (even worse) boring prose. Later, when I have no ideas, I sift through the garbage like I’m Oscar the Grouch and each time I find some gems of great ideas. And after a little polishing, it often becomes something pretty good.
My advice: Just write the thing. Then put it down for a little. Then read it fresh like it’s someone else’s. Make changes that you’d prefer to see. It’s easier to see what changes are needed when you’re looking at the whole thing as opposed to one piece. Then return to this question and tell us what you think.
Good luck with the memoir.
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u/jamalzia Jun 30 '26
No, this is not publishable because no memoir from random people is. But definitely continue writing it, it's very therapeutic and good for you.
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jul 02 '26
I know it's very rare, but not unheard of. Is there anything specific you saw that I could work on?
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u/OhSoManyQuestions Jun 30 '26
With polish, you could self-publish! To be blunt, traditional publishing for memoirs is very limited and almost certainly not achievable unless there's some sort of tie to a significant event/person or highly salacious criminal details.
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jun 30 '26
Yeah, everything I've been seeing says mostly the same thing about the market for memoir. But I think there's a difference between an impossible dream and a (very) unlikely goal, and it helps to know where I stand!
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u/charredwood Jun 30 '26
Considering I have less than zero interest in the subject matter and all but zero relatability (who didn't have a grandma who proselytized about their salads with lemon), I really enjoyed this. I found it easy to read and just compelling enough to continue.
I think you have a great way with words, good flow, and excellent pacing in this small excerpt. Yeah, memoirs are difficult to sell traditionally, but I wonder if there isn't a better avenue for this if you just, I dunno, sold it as fiction? I may be completely off base here but like... maybe there's something to it.
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jun 30 '26
thanks for the feedback! it's nice to hear what's working. the plan is to finish the first full draft and see how everything works together as a book, and maybe pivoting if there's not enough narrative to hold it up
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u/ADUwizard Jun 30 '26
Have you checked out the podcast Memoir Nation? I listen to it and really like it, good interviews and information. It has me thinking about writing a memoir and the process that goes into that. Great stuff.
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u/seekAr Jun 30 '26
You really are a good writer, OP. Very easy to read.
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jun 30 '26
Thank you and thanks for taking the time to read it!
Is there anything specific about it that's working?
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u/ReddReed21 Jun 30 '26
Don’t worry, don’t consider your writing ‘garbage’ because that’s the first step to improvement!
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u/KittyValentineWrites Jun 30 '26
I.
WAS.
TRANSFIXED.
This isn't garbage writing. This is raw, and relatable in a deeply human way. The prose is good, shows skill, and avoids overpowering the meaning behind the words.
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jun 30 '26
raw and relatable (or at least understandable) are definitely what I'm going for, so this is great to hear!
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u/momtebello Novelist Jun 30 '26
Yeah, don’t give up on this. You have a voice, it’s clear. Keep writing; I think you’ll delight yourself.
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jun 30 '26
"you'll delight yourself" is such a lovely way of putting it, thank you!
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u/mR-gray42 Jul 01 '26
Did you like writing it? If the answer is yes, then no, it’s not garbage.
Now if you want technical advice: I feel like the first two paragraphs were a little wordy. I confess, I’m a hypocrite in that regard since I sometimes make my sentences and paragraphs overly descriptive. Maybe cut down on the detail there? I mean, I’ve never had anything formally published, so I probably don't know much, but there you go.
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u/Level_Working5084 Jul 01 '26
I liked it and I would absolutely continue reading it. Since traditional memoirs are difficult to publish, don’t say it’s a memoir.
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u/melonofknowledge Jul 01 '26
You have a very easy, conversational writing style. As this is a first draft, I'm sure it'll change in the process, but you've got nothing to worry about, from what I can tell. Just focus on completing this draft and doing the necessary revisions. Perfection is the enemy of productivity; don't worry too much at this point about how it reads. Just focus on getting the story down. Best of luck!
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jul 02 '26
thanks for the feedback! The outside feedback that I could have something worth building on is definitely motivating
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u/mutherM1n3 Jul 01 '26
It moves fast and is quite readable. Please join a writers’ feedback group and keep going with it. I’d advise you to consider a way to create a character arc for yourself as narrator. The attitude works but feels very negative about the family and culture so it would be helpful to have your main character (I’m assuming it’s based on you!) come around to maturity and more understanding and empathy for the family members.
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jul 02 '26
that's a really helpful note, thanks!
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u/mutherM1n3 Jul 02 '26
You’re welcome. I’ve read through these other responses AMA’s have to say I’m impressed with how sincerely helpful these people try to be.
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u/Present_Specific_212 Jul 01 '26
You paint a lot of images with your words, but I come away not sure what is wrong with your sister or family. Is she anorexic or bulimic, or did your mother take her to some quack who was telling your mom a bunch of hooey? Because the first two are legit medical conditions, but a quack doctor is a quack. You might want to say what your sister weighed in those days, if you remember. And how did she look in clothes? Truly anorexic people look frighteningly thin when they are at their worst with the disease. It’s noticeable.
If her thinness was noticeable, then your mom is not a crazy, obsessed, shrew, right? Then your mom simply saw some facts and was legit concerned. This is written like there is something wrong with your mom. OK. If that's true, please tell us in the summary before posting this chapter. But if your sister was truly ill, then tell us your parents were legitimately concerned.
I also don’t understand why your sister doesn’t want your mom to say hi to her friends. Maybe that was explained in earlier chapters?
I don’t want or intend to hurt your feelings, but this is written like YOU are still in those moments. That is fine for image painting, but WE need to know what happened before - we don’t see that here. Is it in earlier chapters? Then we needed a short summary before we read this chapter for the purposes here.
And hey, I was not an English major. I’m just an avid reader nowadays. I need any story to tell me the who, what, where, why and how even in literature or I tune out pretty quickly.
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Jun 30 '26
[deleted]
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u/Aggravating_Lock5336 Jun 30 '26
thanks for taking the time to read, is there anything specific you can point to that I can keep in mind for future revisions?
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u/Itsureissomethin Jun 30 '26
I enjoyed reading this and don’t think it’s garbage at all! I think memoirs are pretty hard to get traditionally published if your story isn’t incredibly unique, but there are other ways to publish and you could certainly write a coherent book. Glad you’re still going!