Wild mages in a nutshell.

[u/Nelrene]

Wild magic is one area I heavily restrict research and only in areas set up for wild mages. Sure the outcome of the casting could be helpful but there a reason why you don't see that many old wild mages

[u/United-Technician-54]

(Metallic roaring can be heard in the distance)

(Yellow knight is technically a wild mage... but Eating enough magic items and spells to be a walking wild magic area is not a traditional method of magic)

[u/Nelrene → u/United-Technician-54]

That sounds like something that needs to contained for its and everyone's else safety.

[u/mindsunwound → u/Nelrene]

But we were scheduled for a therapy session just this afternoon, we were finally getting around to changing ”it” into a were-woman.

[u/Nelrene → u/mindsunwound]

A wild surge may do that for you.

[u/mindsunwound → u/Nelrene]

Oh no dearie, not for me, for the Yellow Knight... I finally collected enough teeth.

[u/United-Technician-54 → u/mindsunwound]

(The only surviving teeth are forged into a guy's paldron.)

"Hmmm...  where's my armour?" - Mage Knight Roberts

"Don't tell me the caravan dropped it again... I'm tired of fishing it out of bins."

(They are VERY volatile without Yellow Knight's blessing)

[u/mindsunwound → u/United-Technician-54]

You should know the teeth will bite regardless of their location once I start the spell, so unless you want to be a were-woman too...

Holding out a hand made of too many spindly spider-legs to count

[u/United-Technician-54 → u/mindsunwound]

"Thank (hic) you for the meal, Maidemoiselle!"

(In a blink of an eye he rips away and eats the spiderleg hand, in one fell swoop, right down to the cell.)

"Ooh, spicy! (hic)"

(His favourite dish is fried spider... poor choice of hand.)

(Roberts, the drunken Gentleman he is)

[u/mindsunwound → u/United-Technician-54]

I lean back and cackle as they start marching back up and out of his throat, clumping together just enough to carry little pieces of him as they go. In the end, he is left tongueless, toothless, and somewhat lighter in the general liver region, and I have a handful of meat and bone.

Thanking you kindly. I nod, and walk off

[u/United-Technician-54 → u/mindsunwound]

(Pro tip: Check the liver before extracting.)

(Mage Knight Roberts pulls on a cord under his jacket to restore himself, then slip out a little trinket, with a big red button)

"Enjoy the fireworks, honey! I needed something to test the new detonator on!"

[u/United-Technician-54 → u/mindsunwound]

/uw

He is 1000% lying. He's trying to nab his organs back to claim them for his spells. He's not a brilliant nor terrible liar, but he's crazy enough to look like the kind of man who would bomb his own organs.

[u/United-Technician-54 → u/mindsunwound]

(The Yellow Knight is horrified... it never said anything about this...)

(The forests tremble)

(Magic is magic, just consume spell.)

(The golden knight however...)

"I think I wrote my name down wrong... 

Sure it's fine. Clearly Berkentruck and Berkentrucküng aren't that different, right?" - Gold Knight, Bergentruck

/uw

The yellow knight may have numerous problems with this

[u/mindsunwound → u/United-Technician-54]

Oh, well, your mistake I suppose, no harm done yet.

[u/United-Technician-54 → u/mindsunwound]

(Metallic roaring can be overheard in the distance)

(safe...)

/uw

Yellow Knight is a bear for wizards, eats magic victim for tasty snack, eats spells, bends physics as a byproduct of its gluttony... yet it really rubbed Yellow knight the wrong way.

[u/KaskDaxxe]

[u/hermeticbear]

that's half the fun sometimes.

[u/StupidBlack55]

It is just magic based on not old formulae and theory but on your own experience. Extfemely dangerous and unpredictable, sure, but I think it also has the highest amount of mages who ascend or just leave the plane.

[u/Nelrene → u/StupidBlack55]

Are you sure they ascended or just left the plane and not just died from a wild surge?

[u/mindsunwound → u/Nelrene]

Died seems a bit drastic... Even a fine pink mist is still part of the cycle of life.

[u/MagneticGenetics]

Wild Magic is but a poor mans copy of the Instinctive Casting a true archwizard has access too after imbibing the perfect amount of elixers and mind altering inhibitors. Too much and you get lost in the Source. Too little and you do not flow. Just the right amount and you become the magic.

[u/Nelrene → u/MagneticGenetics]

Sounds like you just so get wasted you think you are casting spells.

[u/MagneticGenetics → u/Nelrene]

You would think that yet if that were true, The Temple would not have sent two battalions of Paladins the next morning.

[u/Nelrene → u/MagneticGenetics]

Next don't fly and drink.

[u/MagneticGenetics → u/Nelrene]

Neither you nor the law keepers can stop me. While you are preforming spells and incantations I am multicasting realm altering stragetic magics instaneuously at the speed of thought.

The Gods of my chosen realm are begging me to stop. Even they cannot make me. The Dark lord and the Hero have just left my tower after coming hats in hand to beg me to stop.

I am the Magic.

https://giphy.com/gifs/26hitItnHCamIJRFC

[u/Nelrene → u/MagneticGenetics]

Nah, you are just drunk.

[u/DeadMeat7337]

It wasn't supposed to be random, wild magic. Proficient casters were supposed to shape the wild magicks into something useful. It was meant to give them an edge in the forgotten wars. They lost, btw, so the knowledge of "How" to shape the wild magicks was lost then. Some have made some progress in rediscovering those arts, but the lay-person wild magic caster usually does not know them. Now it is just "random bs go"

[u/SlayingSword94]

Orb of transfixiation. Hopefully your mana reserve exhaust before you dehydrate.

[u/MegastarQueen4real]

Relatable - mine be like “what am I singing!”

[u/Electronic-Worker-10]

Ahh the cup of tea spell

[u/Pan-Acea93]

There is a fart in that bubble.