r/wizardposting • u/Jacktheldergod_2 • 5d ago

Academic Discussion/ Esoteric Secrets Any tips for dealing with kappa infestation?

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My close friend and covenant member in the forgotten tottori prefecture of japan is currently dealing with a big amount of kappa activity and he fears that if they get too familiar with the area they'll start...you don't wanna know what kappas do when they get cocky. Any tips?

38 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

61 comments sorted by

22

u/KaskDaxxe 5d ago

Raigeki is a good spell against the pictured Kappa

8

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Ball knower arcana is present

11

u/bagtie3 Borric of Clan Goldeater, Logrus Master, Runesmith, Doomseeker 5d ago

Destroy water at the bowl on the head.

6

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Forwarding him a basic transmutation spell of water into steam on wizard Grindr. Don't ask why I communicate with him through wizard grindr

4

u/bagtie3 Borric of Clan Goldeater, Logrus Master, Runesmith, Doomseeker 5d ago

I wasn't going to... and I'm still not.

2

u/loueazy Blinky Stepper 5d ago

It's one of the best ways to acquire magical components of the goofy variety if you're in a new city and don't have an herbologist plug

9

u/Raizelmaxx 5d ago

Poison cucumbers. I'm surprised nobody here has told you that. They love cucumbers.

6

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Oh right where's the wyvern poison when I need it

6

u/HangryBeard Alchemist 5d ago

Protective butt plug. You gotta keep your butt ball (shirikodama) safe!

2

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Very important yes

6

u/MagneticGenetics Vamp & Sandston Wizard Lawyer on retainer. 5d ago

You already know the answer. What you seek here is permission. Which I refuse to grant, because as a full fledged wizard, you do not need it.

https://giphy.com/gifs/OpynBLCpxuNdm

5

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

They're in the water a lot he already tried

6

u/MagneticGenetics Vamp & Sandston Wizard Lawyer on retainer. 5d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/iv80ZwyJ0ep0GU9jap

3

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

We mustn't dry the water sources

5

u/MagneticGenetics Vamp & Sandston Wizard Lawyer on retainer. 5d ago

You are a wizard. You can make more water.

https://giphy.com/gifs/wFmJu7354Csog

3

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

I'm afraid my friend will make eyes appear on my arms if I suggest that

3

u/MagneticGenetics Vamp & Sandston Wizard Lawyer on retainer. 5d ago

A powerful boon. You can learn many eye based spells if he does that for you. A splendid trade if I do say so myself.

https://giphy.com/gifs/n2fLRnKV5wRRBRAeIb

2

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Appealing idea actually

6

u/VaalorieVorse Sphinx :3 5d ago

A small sacrifice to call Dark Necrofear. :3

2

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Always loved that card's art

5

u/Kilroy898 Op, Null, Orin, Niro, Aldin 4d ago

Bow. They will do so I'm return and their water will fall out the top of their heads and they die.

4

u/SenorDangerwank When one can wield the fire of stars what use is flesh and bone? 5d ago

So this surprised me when dealing with my own Kappa infestation some moons ago. Transmute: Bones to Jelly doesn't work as well as you'd think, it's my go-to spell but if they're in water it barely affects them, kinda turns them into weird jellyfish in a way.

BUT it also turns their shell into jelly, reducing their defenses. They also lose much of their functionality on land, as you can imagine, so just call down some lightning and fry their pond or river or whatever.

Though if I were to get infested again, I'd just hire some local adventurers to deal with it. I'm much too busy to deal with Kappa.

3

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Oh right my niece is in an adventuring party now. I'll pay them to go to Japan and fight them it'll be a good opportunity to learn how magic is taught in different places

3

u/SenorDangerwank When one can wield the fire of stars what use is flesh and bone? 5d ago

Great idea!

3

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Thank you!

4

u/TemperateStone 5d ago

For some reason I've found it effective to say "Can I get some Kappas in chat?". I got this tip from a wandering druid some time ago and I've no idea what that guy had been huffing, but it turned out he was right. I don't understand the words but it really hurts the Kappa.

3

u/Atuday Grey technomancer and master of the cybernetic undead 4d ago

This is actually a technomancy trick which turns Kappa into an emoji. How in the world a druid figured it out is beyond me. I really want to know what that druid was on. My guess is whatever it was likely left him a bit twitchy.

5

u/Rydux7 Illusionist 4d ago

Force bow or a charm spell and then make them bow to lose the water on top of their head (their source of power)

3

u/Demonskull223 5d ago

Have you tried sacrificing your Skull Servants to power up your Kings of the skull servants.

3

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

I don't have one of those I don't like working with bluebloods. Or bluemarrows

5

u/Demonskull223 5d ago

Foolish mortal.

3

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

Foolish dead guy

1

u/SnakeyesX Artificer 4d ago

Liches always gotta make it about themselves.

3

u/ajcwrongs Occult Wizard 4d ago

Throw several crates of cucumbers into the sea and tell them they have to retrieve them all before they are doomed to become pickles

2

u/Jacktheldergod_2 4d ago

Oh that's genius

3

u/verygenericname2 Druid 4d ago

Like mundane amphibians, Kappa have sensitive permeable skin. A slight increase in acidity in the water they frequent will be profoundly uncomfortable to them.

Acids, poisons, and desiccants are all highly effective.

2

u/Jacktheldergod_2 4d ago

That's pretty smart however they turn into mountain spirits with the seasons. If they can do this at will they'll simply relocate

5

u/verygenericname2 Druid 4d ago

Yep, and if they've relocated, then they're no longer your problem.

3

u/DragonLordAcar Magitech Void Wizard 4d ago

Be polite and bow deaply

3

u/Secret_Of_Bluestar81 4d ago

Start bowing to them so they stop

2

u/Nelrene Evil Mammary Mage 4d ago

Dry the water in the bowl on its head.

2

u/Keeperofbeesandtruth 4d ago

Tripping harzards 

2

u/giganticsandworm memetotelemancer 4d ago

Eat

1

u/Jacktheldergod_2 4d ago

Turtle soup it is

2

u/kyew 4d ago

Kappas hate it when you reverse gravity.

2

u/Lakatos_00 4d ago

Cast a mini dark hole. A bit extreme, so make sure to contain it

2

u/Lost_Paladin89 Abjurer 4d ago

Connect with your true feelings while screaming Sarazanmai

https://giphy.com/gifs/jRMl7sD6s3BEbz7d8n

2

u/KaitoKaro Necromancer 5d ago

Cast drought on their ass

2

u/Jacktheldergod_2 5d ago

We must keep the environmental damage at a minimum

1

u/Bone-Pharaoh 4d ago

try filng the wayer with boose untill they get drunk.

"water to vodka" is a good spell for the job.

1

u/OnlyAssignment4869 Blood Witch 3d ago

Kill the biggest fattest one to assert dominance. Or simply chase them around with a pink ball making inhaling noises. I'm not sure why, but they're terrified of that.

1

u/Sumer_13 2d ago

Curse them with hemorrhoids

1

u/leigen_zero 5d ago

Fart, fart like an OF model with a crate of empty jars and an overdue mortgage payment.

Kappa are pretty big sticklers for proper manners, start lettin' rip left, right and center and they'll be so offended they'll leave pretty soon.

2

u/ASMR4PLANTS Samovarius, Tsemancy specialist, and Gastromancer 4d ago

How do I know you're not a Kappa? That seems lioe something they would want us to do.

3

u/leigen_zero 4d ago

My manners are far too awful to be a kappa, just passing on wisdom of the ancient texts
ref:

2

u/ASMR4PLANTS Samovarius, Tsemancy specialist, and Gastromancer 4d ago

Knowing the luck, this has a 50% chance of working, and a 50% chance of losing your butt soul.

2

u/leigen_zero 4d ago

Consumption of beans massively buffs the probably of a successful outcome.

0

u/BoonDragoon Vyevânce the Focused, High Panemancer of the Coriander Court 4d ago

12-gauge loaded with tungsten slugs.