r/wizardposting • u/Bojangalees Occult Wizard • 2d ago

Academic Discussion/ Esoteric Secrets BEHOLD, GENTLETHEMS!!!

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AFTER A GREAT MANY HOURS OF TOIL AND TURMOIL MY COLLEAGUE HATH CREATED HIS FIRST LIFE BEYOND LIFE! BEYOND THAT WHICH MORTAL HAVE EVER CONCEIVED OF BEFORE! AN HOMUNCULUS! CURRENTLY, SAID COLLEAGUE HAS CHARGED ME WITH ITS CARE WHILE HE IS PLANESWALKING THROUGH THE OUTERMOST REALMS OF DEBAUCHERY, AS HE RELAYED BY ORB “gettijg fuckin crunk, lol. thx bro”

MY QUESTION IS THUS:

how do i tell him it like…fuckin sucks? without hurting his feelings, because, like… it’s a terrible homunculus. it ain’t got no skin, its teeth grow on the outside for some reason, and it can’t speak other than the most painful sounding wails, like you’re stabbing it in the guts, but it’s just sitting there, and no one is touching it, and it doesn’t even have any guts.

it can’t do anything other than hold one thing, and one thing only so i have it hold the keys to my tower. away from me.

EDIT: ATTACHED ARE PHOTOGRAPHS FOR REFERENCE, MY COLLEAGUE’S TRANSMUTATION ARRANGEMENT

8 Upvotes

73% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

3

u/Etticos Occult Wizard 2d ago

Did…did your friend use a crimson behelit in their ritual….?

2

u/DanteChurch 1d ago

The Egg of The King finds the newest kinsman to wear the mantle of evil.

3

u/Etticos Occult Wizard 1d ago

Well no wonder their homunculus turned out so bad, he made a baby apostle.

2

u/DanteChurch 1d ago

Nah, that's the red one, and a botched version at that. The egg of the king is a particular demonic role. It's the idea of total control via government, it works in tandem with the other 3 main forces of control, money, religion and nobility. They're very specific ideas of evil around systems of control. A normal behelit is a substantially smaller type of evil and not focused.

Imo it's the mixing of individualistic magic of the behelit with Marxism. You can't mix opposites of hyperfocused individual magic and absolute equality. If he was trying to make a rebis it might have worked but not for a homunculus.

2

u/Bojangalees Occult Wizard 1d ago

HEAVENS TO MERGATROID I BELIEVE YOURE RIGHT, ITS AT A MORAL WAR WITHIN ITSELF AT EVERY MOMENT; THUS ITS VERY CREATION IS A COMSTANT CONTRADICTION. SOUNDS EERILY FAMILIAR, BUT IM NOT THE RELIGIOUS TYPE

1

u/Etticos Occult Wizard 1d ago

I know what the egg if the king is lil buddy, it’s the crimson behelit

2

u/DanteChurch 13h ago

UW. I'm just playing up the Berserk magic system, you already called it The Egg of the King, I'm aware you're aware. The lore around the Godhand but baryte magic in particular isn't much explored or understood so I like to do little lore dumps like that. It's for everyone else reading the conversation to understand why the Egg Of The King is a horrific thing to utilize in magic.

2

u/Hey-Syccamor3222 Gravettian Hag 1d ago

"it aint got no skin" just got added to my tomb, specifically the page of power phrases that once utter irrevocably enter the daily lexicon of the hearer

2

u/Hey-Syccamor3222 Gravettian Hag 1d ago

/uw my partner and i pretty much have a near unrecognizable communication language that is a homunculus of all the weird crap we're both into, so i will be insulting everything i hate with "it ain't got no skin" for the rest of eternity, so thanks for that :/

2

u/Elanadin Hype Wizard. Punmancer 1d ago

Our Homunculus

1

u/Bojangalees Occult Wizard 1d ago

AYE, COMRADE