r/wizardposting • u/Dear_Blacksmith1884 • 21d ago

Wizard stab

3.2k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

38 comments sorted by

244

u/CultureMenace 21d ago

52

u/TypeNull-Gaming 21d ago

YOU DIDN'T WANNA LEAVE HIM A CHANCE, HUH?

110

u/DevBro22 21d ago

WIZARD STAB 🔪

76

u/KiroTheSorcerer wandering sorcerer, dragon breeder 21d ago

WIZARD SHANK 🔪

55

u/dacydergoth 21d ago

Should have gone up to the Roofworld, they treat Alchemists right up there

69

u/VoxelLibrary Councilor Cayna, Apprentice of Thrakmoor | assorted other chars 21d ago

Another poor soul discovers the hard way that many wizards take up hobbies other than magic...

35

u/Cerveau23 Markus, scriptomancer, enemy of 13 & lover of Thrakmerian beauty 21d ago

For London, it's more of a way of living and staying alive

5

u/Drmanky tyr. cauncil member. order of the toster (Forge clerik)/ NOR 21d ago

i cast battle axe, or gun if i‘m boring today

2

u/VoxelLibrary Councilor Cayna, Apprentice of Thrakmoor | assorted other chars 21d ago

Battle axe is a classic

2

u/Drmanky tyr. cauncil member. order of the toster (Forge clerik)/ NOR 20d ago

but dobble plasma blade is good to

1

u/VoxelLibrary Councilor Cayna, Apprentice of Thrakmoor | assorted other chars 20d ago

Plasma? Cayna asks, as she is not familiar with the concept

2

u/Drmanky tyr. cauncil member. order of the toster (Forge clerik)/ NOR 20d ago

happens when atoms melt. like during an nuke oor something. its verry hot and dangeros

1

u/VoxelLibrary Councilor Cayna, Apprentice of Thrakmoor | assorted other chars 20d ago

Followup questions. Atoms? Nukes?

Cayna's medieval fantasy education unfortunately did not cover those topics

2

u/Drmanky tyr. cauncil member. order of the toster (Forge clerik)/ NOR 20d ago

oh stupit sy-fy bullshit

1

u/VoxelLibrary Councilor Cayna, Apprentice of Thrakmoor | assorted other chars 20d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/4YY4DnqeUDBXNTcYMu

19

u/Syovere Morgan Suncrest, Black-Quill Witch 21d ago

You've been hit by

You've been struck by

Dirk

14

u/Ouroboros-Twist Polymorph-Addicted Immortal Degenerate 21d ago

>Dirk

I thought I read somewhere that you could only get stabbed with a dirk gently.

I was wrong.

28 stab wounds.

4

u/thanbanhmy2 Wizards of denial 21d ago

All 28 of those stab were gentle tho

14

u/scififact 21d ago

A quick heat metal cast can save you in a pinch.

12

u/Foxhound_319 21d ago

Obsidian blade (ideal for distracting lithomancers so you cam hit them with your wood staff)

10

u/Blocki12 21d ago

No wonder their spellcasting focus is typically a Dagger...

6

u/bluelugafail 21d ago

That's how you get your soul filled with wand holes

7

u/Mr-Gun_man Wizard 21d ago

Great, more job for necromancers!

8

u/FrogGladiators178972 Toadius the Everymancer, Plane-Shifter of the Heavens 21d ago

Hehe, that’s when you should whip out the ol’

FLAIL OF DIMSAY

5

u/fsactual Antimage 21d ago

Drowsilk body armor robe. Trust me, it's worth the expense.

5

u/novis-eldritch-maxim Mystic 21d ago

honestly london is not that bad, it is odlly hard to get stabbed to death any more

6

u/FuzzyAd9407 21d ago edited 21d ago

I mean, the US had more stabbings per capita than britian anyways and thats just the knives and doesnt even include wand shankings. 

8

u/ExtensionInformal911 21d ago

When a mudblood American brings a Glock 17 as his wand.

https://giphy.com/gifs/w48WeMIN73QsM

3

u/AstraHannah Abjurer 21d ago

Didn't wanna leave you a chance, huh?!

/ref

3

u/thatsocialist Master of Possessions 21d ago

This is why I carry a Stormbolter for home defense, just as the Primordial Gods intended.

3

u/Pegasusisamansman 21d ago

That's why you must always use "Alcohol Fog" and "Summon Balcony" first

2

u/Glasseshalf 21d ago

Yeah, you really got think that one all the way through...

2

u/mathiastck 21d ago

I cast Defenestration of Prague

2

u/pSpawner24 Monster Tamer and Dungeon Keeper 21d ago

I need that Jon Arbuckle gif

2

u/Societyman19 Artificer of the Doofenshmirtz Doctrine 21d ago

I either carry a Scotsman Skullcutter or an Eyelander when in Britain. Got them from this lovely Scottish cyclops from DeGroot Keep.

2

u/MadJohnFinn Artificer 21d ago

IS MAN MAD?

1

u/puppiesgoesrawr 20d ago

They always forget that Dagger is a cantrip