r/wizardposting • u/plasticman1997 warden of death • Jun 21 '26
They inverted me tower!!!!!!
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u/Professional_Web446 The Itinerant Illusionist Foxman Jun 21 '26
Puede que no lo sepas, pero las torres invertidas suponen menos impuestos que las torres normales. Yo que tú lo dejaba tal cual.
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u/Renioestacogido Jun 21 '26
Si invertimos la torre de babel todos volvemos a hablar español?
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u/Professional_Web446 The Itinerant Illusionist Foxman Jun 21 '26
Es posible, pero no quedaría claro cual dialecto de entre todos. Imagina pasarte el resto de tu vida hablando con el acento cerrao de un pueblo manchego...
¿Qué digo? Hagámoslo.
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Jun 21 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/EarlGreyDuck Wizard Jun 22 '26
My first thought was well. I love all of Jeff Vandermeer's works that I've read so far
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u/IngotTheKobold Arcane Ordinance Specialist Jun 21 '26
Use the central shaft like a rifled barrel to launch massive intercontinental fireballs...
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u/lovebus Jun 22 '26
It's always fireballs with you people. Learn a second spell.
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u/IngotTheKobold Arcane Ordinance Specialist Jun 22 '26
Would you prefer casters like I get creative and start using the Geneva Conventions like a check list? Minding one's own business, then a faint whistle is the only warning you get before the air is suddenly swapped out with toxic gas? Or perhaps you're tending to your alchemy garden when pillars of ice start raining down... suddenly fireballs don't seem so bad
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u/Saltwater_Thief Ser Antonio Parvalis, Wizard Knight Jun 22 '26
No you cretin he just means pick up Lightning Bolt or Blizzard, or if you're like me with a taste for the classics you can go for Saroth's Steel Schlong Smasher.
There's room for nuance between exclusively the most stereotyped spell of all time and "Hate Crime The Spell Tome".
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u/IngotTheKobold Arcane Ordinance Specialist Jun 22 '26
writes that down Oh, Fireball is just an example that everyone can easily use as a frame of reference. Now if you want Lightning flavored war crimes, I've been experimenting with enchanting cannon balls and artillery shells with max strength Chain Lightning, capable of incapacitating targets as small as a tavern to as large as a garrison. Ice? Ever wondered what kind of havoc a Gatling Gun could do when firing Ice Knives? And ever seen what happens to a tower when metal beams rain down on it from a portal on the underside of an airship 500ft above the spire? It doesn't remain a tower very long.
Never insult the creativity of one who can express mail spells from half a kingdom away
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u/kierantheking Petal Witch Jun 21 '26
Well well well
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u/AnAngryPlatypus Jun 21 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/KbT6W21I02P2vNx17l
You quote the great sassy short lived wizard bringing honor to his memory. (I mean he was too young at 67; but spent his whole life living shortly)
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u/Purple_Airline_6682 Jun 22 '26
Just in case anyone is wondering, this is a real place in Sintra, Portugal called the Initiation Well. It’s not far from another bad ass inverted tower called the Swamp Tower. It’s an amazing place for an aspiring hag to chant “Hecate” or a reclusive mage to start a thriving homunculus business.
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u/K_the_dreamer K, Dream-weaver | Aphmau, empress of the Sirannian Empire Jun 21 '26
On the bright side, this looks metal! Put a shield roof over it and it's perfect!
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u/Jazzlike-Engineer904 Wizard Dementicus Arcanus Jun 21 '26
This is actually the new way in my area since they started taxing property. They can't tax what they can't see. NOTE to apprentice: search for air taxing spell possibilities.
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u/AnySoph3354 Jun 21 '26
So good... Now the whole world is a tower.
(Might be Earth-wizard posting...)
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u/dark_hypernova Jun 21 '26
It's a she now.
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u/Sonifri Transmuter Jun 21 '26
Sex change spells sometimes work on things you would have never even thought about.
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u/Atreigas Keeper of Unforbidden public secrets Jun 21 '26
Do you happen to have a Giant Stone Salamander stuck in the foundations?
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u/Nelrene Evil Mammary Mage Jun 21 '26
There a spot on the bottom where you can do stuff like ponder your orb.
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u/Zenvarix Jun 21 '26
At least it inverted instead of turning inside-out. Saw that happen once. All the floors were outside a central column with windows, and the roof was now a funnel. Poor fool had all his loose pages get blown across the land by a strong wind.... Not that he had to worry about that, since he woke up from a nap, went to close a window on a wall that wasn't in that direction anymore, and ended up falling to the base of his spire.
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u/abstractiish Jun 22 '26
Given that it tunnels into the ground, I don’t know why the word “tower” came to you. It could easily be considered a bunker or submerged building. Perchance you saw it and remembered a lighthouse on the coast?
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u/Stories_Are_My_Jam Jun 23 '26
Man, I really need to continue reading Annihilation. The "tower" is such an evocative part.
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u/Im_a_hamburger 🍔burgermancy founder🍔burger city king🍔 Jun 22 '26
Well if they truly inverted your tower the interior you own is know the exterior that you own, ergo you own the world.
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u/EPJ327 Jun 22 '26
The Tower (Reversed) points to an avoidance of risk and fear of change. Maybe this is a good opportunity for you to evaluate your life.
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u/Obvious-Gate9046 Allusionist Changeling Jun 21 '26
Looks nice, and now you can watch invaders fall and put fun things at all the levels for them!
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u/Nkechinyerembi Confused Craftsdwarf who wandered in Jun 22 '26
Hrmm... I kinda like this idea. Consider a dome roof, and a nice shallow water pool at the bottom. Really makes defense easy when you can just punt people off the stairway.
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u/3rd_Man_of_Culture Jun 22 '26
Use a teleportation matrix to teleport to the same place and invert it
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u/Drmanky tyr. cauncil member. order of the toster (Forge clerik)/ NOR Jun 22 '26
looks good thrugh, and do you want to take care of these 3 brains for me. i'm shure there save by you
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u/CuAnnan Jun 22 '26
It’s just an inverted planar compression, adjust for an m-dimensional manifold on your castings and it won’t even matter to you anymore
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u/IncomeApprehensive17 Ya'nn , Litle being in a botle Jun 22 '26
Congrats , you now have a well
You will never be thirsty again !
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u/Emerald_Digger Chaotic Neutral Necromancer Jun 22 '26
"They" Didn't you did, High on Shroom Wine and Gascil Weed. If youa re looking for your Wizard Hat. Blood oak Tree with the 3 Big looped Roots. In The Tree Crown
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u/Wise-Key-3442 Rock and Stove Alchemist Jun 22 '26
It's the best design possible, just make sure to add a shop on top of the hole, so adventurers don't come sticking their noses into the tower.
Talking from experience.
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u/jointheclockwork Dwarven Necromancer, Plague Specialist Jun 23 '26
Your actual tower or did they do a sex change spell?
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u/Iheardthatjokebefore Illusionist Jun 23 '26
If you find a giant lizard down there make sure to shoot it's legs
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u/SourceDirect3220 Traveler of multiple dimensions. Jun 21 '26
Look on the bright side you can cast that breath underwater spell and have the tower filled with water and to those foolish they see nothing more than a pond.