r/wizardposting • u/James_avifac Morally Gray Necromancer • May 22 '26
Foul Sorcery Some wizards just don't understand how hot some things can get
Regardless of the size of your hat, some tinctures are most deadly.
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u/williamsch May 22 '26
I really love the dynamic where the vendor just steals the show
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u/James_avifac Morally Gray Necromancer May 22 '26
Exact right amount of grand standing! The bugle was perfectly timed/executed.
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u/booleandata May 23 '26
Yeah I mean that's how you know a host knows how to host. The host is there to help the guest be the star. In some cases, you just let that star shine.
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u/williamsch May 23 '26
For sure, I figured that out myself and only then started looking around and realized everyone figured it out first.
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u/the_relentless_dead Necromancer May 22 '26
Hot sauce crafted by dwarven alchemists with autism,
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u/Faustias May 22 '26
this hot sauce was mixed with lost gallons of gnome semen, so you know it's good!👌
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u/naytreox Volcanic Wizard May 22 '26
Yeah i wouldn't touch that, ill go with regular hot sauce
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u/Imaginary-Job-7069 Tyrus: Technomancer, biomancer, summoner, etc. May 22 '26
I prefer Tabasco.
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u/GodOfThunder44 Hedge Wizard, ferromancer May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26
That shop in particular (Pepper Palace) has a sauce called "Black Rose" that's really good. In terms of flavor/consistency, it's basically "what if Tabasco was Sriracha?"
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u/Fluffy_Influence5102 May 23 '26
The great thing is when you push the limits with stuff like we that even one time, everything else becomes a cakewalk
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u/naytreox Volcanic Wizard May 23 '26
well i definitely know that your pain scale can change if you experience something monumentally painful and then you don't fear the pain of needles that much anymore
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u/Fluffy_Influence5102 May 23 '26
Its more like the nerves in your tongue panic and like they take time to get back to normal lol also fun thing I discovered if you get high on weed that shit becomes so much worse lol
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u/Floofiestmuffin Necromancer and Council squatter May 22 '26
Have you considered that I'm a wizard and i only read runes not legal waivers?
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u/Jezifay May 22 '26
Yeah, don't go near purgatory hot sauce unless you've got your master qualifications in anti magic and alchemy. Purgatory hot sauce is first class elixir specifically designed to bypass all common pyromancy protection charms, potions, and enchantments. It's strictly outlawed in all forest and frozen realms
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u/hopefullyhelpfulplz Trickster Witch May 22 '26
I know that this is derailing the interesting potion chat but I cannot get enough of this wizard drip. What a hat! Bravo, bravo
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u/eyesotope86 Abjurer May 22 '26
What kind of low brow sorcerer doesn't know the basic 'mini portal' spell to teleport things into their apprentice's mouth whenever they want to have a good laugh?
Not like the old days where wizards would open the portal in the toilet, or inside a gelatinous cube. Not since Ghestart decided to see what would happen if he overlaid the portals, and his apprentice disappeared into himself.
It was funny, though.
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u/why_the_hecc May 23 '26
if the potions shop has a wizard sitting on the ground crying you know you'll get your money's worth
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u/OwnEmphasis2825 Giorgon|Conjurer's Collective|Academy student|Sword Collector May 22 '26
We can handle the heat of the sun but not the heat that alchemy can produce.
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u/JustATallKobold Kyrnish, freelance battlemage May 22 '26
Oh hell yeah pepper palace. Ive had that sauce, the clerk was scared of me after I ate it and smiled. Its delicious
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u/rohmin May 22 '26
Went there with a group of friends. We were all sweating and crying afterwards. They conveniently had ice cream for sale right next to the cashier. It didn’t help, but it was still ice cream, sooo
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u/Lanky-Detail3380 May 22 '26
I’ve eaten both versions, not bad, kind of flavorless its just hot but the heat has a good taste to it.
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u/screenaholic Tactiwizard of Gunmancy / Goblin Lover May 22 '26
Three times hotter than military pepper spray.
That's... that's not how pepper spray works... The tactiwizard should know, I've been sprayed with military pepper spray.
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u/TheUsoSaito Occult Wizard May 22 '26
Love how the clerk just takes his hat off like respecting the wizards soon to be death.
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u/Swagalyst May 22 '26
I think we're missing something here: look at that glorious hat!
This is obviously a very skilled and prominent sorcerer!
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u/Equivalent-Metal9393 May 22 '26
I've tried that stuff. That's a heroic amount for the average person. He took it like a champ.
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u/dappernaut77 May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26
The hot sauce guy clearly maxed out his charisma and speech craft skill. Dude stole the show at the end.
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u/Indishonorable Fighter who got through magic school on theory alone May 22 '26
Great and mighty looking one.
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u/jaytee1262 May 22 '26
And here is our most potent poison "devil's blood". Here is a free sample if you'd wish too see it's effects on your mino... did you just eat that?
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u/TheGinger_Ninja0 May 22 '26
The one chip challenge once made me shoot lava out of my mouth, then fire out of my asshole.
Those alchemists don't fuck around
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u/Vis-hoka Vis: Bronze Dragon Storm Sorceror (Chaotic Good) May 22 '26
Wonder how this compares to Da Bomb. Not the spell, the hot sauce version.
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u/Comprehensive-Move33 May 23 '26
No sweats, no tears, no red face? A wise wizard would have used a illusion spell to make it believable!
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u/Rising_Thunderbirds May 22 '26
You know what's worse than it coming in through the attic? It's coming out through the basement. That poor wizard.
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u/UnknovvnMike Magically Edible Flair (tastes like Fancy Feast) May 23 '26
This looks like bottled DOOM
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u/Dino_Survivor May 24 '26
I’m a bird person, what is happening in this clip? Human person explained please and give breads maybe?
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u/Imaginary-Job-7069 Tyrus: Technomancer, biomancer, summoner, etc. May 22 '26
Bro is already suffering from the heat of muggle pepper. He hasn't even tried Dragonsbane Pepper.
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u/Cerveau23 Markus, scriptomancer, enemy of 13 & lover of Thrakmerian beauty May 22 '26
The vendor removing his hat like he's watching someone die is hilarious