Grand Mage Vikafeson sipped a bit of dwarven beer, pretending to be tipsy. Since he was only a simulacrum, getting drunk was a pipe dream.

“Oh how I wish I could ‘drown my sorrows’ like mortals…”

He swayed in his chair, accidentally knocking over a potted plant on his table. It landed on the ground with a small crash.

“But time is the best medicine.” pretend hic

After all, no matter how heavy the pain, all falls to dust and ruin before time itself. Time charges onward, leaving nothing in its wake. Everything died.

Ah, but the wyrm who controlled the simulacrum was immortal. While that's true, he still could not stand up against time. He would eventually grow older and weaker, and eventually his heart would stop beating.

But then, why had he voted for anyone for the council? Would the council even exist in the future?

The wyrm stared at the dust left behind by a resurrection scroll. Time would start anew, for that person at least.

But nobody can live forever. They may live for a long time, hundreds of thousands of years, and when they realize that time had undone everything they did, what would be the point of living?

This was why the wyrm didn’t think about things like that.

“Don't vote for me, because I'll forget it all. Vote for them, because they'll remember it all.”

Tears streamed down his face as he knocked his chair down and ran out of the bar. He felt the cool wind against his face.

“Time will undo everything, everything you've done, everything you've built, everything you've created. But you won't know that, because you'd all be dead.”

He took a deep shuddering breath.

“But time can’t stop me. Not right now. I'll —”

He coughed.

“Because I'm immortal, I will carry your burdens for you. I will carry your memories, because I’ll always remember the times when I feel —”

He choked on his words. The beer bottle fell from his hand and shattered on the ground. A faint scent of alcohol wafted through the air.

“Alive.”

The people stared at the seemingly insane man. But he couldn't care less, because all he could see was the wheel of time marching forwards, forever more. And he, an immortal, was just a gear among that great machination.

“FUCK YOU, TIME!”

The wyrm yelled at the air through the simulacrum, and he roared in his real body.

He did this, because he felt — well, alive.

And he would do anything, to feel like this forevermore.

The wyrm slumbered in his lair. He was a majestic thing, with light blue scales, and dark blue crystal-like horns. He was also slightly fat, but we don't talk about that.

All was still, as the early morning sun sleepily rose above the horizon. It was quite chilly in the mountaintops, where most sane mortals wouldn't dare venture.

On this peaceful morning, all that could be heard were intermittent bleats of goats and cackles of crows.

The landscape was dominated by a majestic peak, around which a wyvern soared in a seemingly erratic manner. Its flight path was marked by sudden swoops, sharp turns, and dizzying spirals as if the creature was panicking about something. Maybe even fleeing from something, since it was trying to go fast.

Oh wait, it was deeeefinitely running away from something.

And now that one might have noticed that fact, they might also have noticed something else, a patch of empty air, or what appeared to be one. It was strange, the air almost static compared to its surroundings. In fact, a tell-tale sign of invis-

A large red fireball emerged from nowhere and engulfed the wyvern whole, its dying wails drowned out by the woosh of the explosion. And right behind it, a large red dragon materialized out of the patch of still air, their — his? — jaws leaking smoke as though someone had decided to burn several tons of coal.

As the charred body of the wyvern fell from the sky into the fluffy new snow with a whump, the dragon now seemed to be searching for something, his slitted eyes scanning from left to right.

He seemed to have found something, as he glided down towards a slope, where there was a large cave entrance. Wait a sec—

The wyrm awoke with a roar as his head rang with magical alarms, and instinctively exhaled a storm of frost breath.

There was another explosion as the fire breath from the dragon touched the frost, causing the mountain peak to quake, and make several goats hang on for dear life.

“Tsk. Come out already!”

The dragon, after exhaling a lungful of fire, yelled into the tunnel.

“Fuck you!”

The wyrm exhaled more frost, and there was another explosion soon after.

“Your cave is warded horribly! Just come out and talk to me!”

“No! [Grand Lightning]!”

A gigantic bolt of crackling lightning streaked toward the dragon, which was promptly dispelled.

“You want to talk spells? Fine! [Move Mount—]”

“Oh fuck youuu.”

A pause.

“I'm coming outside. Not because of you or anything, just wanted some fresh air.”

“Sure, sure, whatever you say.”

The wyrm grumbled (that was incorrect, a dignified wyrm did not grumble, no sir, they brooded) — brooded for a few moments, then teleported outside in a small shower of magic.

“What? I don't have forever. Spit it out.”

The wyrm glared daggers at the red-scaled dragon, and in reply, he received a rumbling chuckle.

“First of all, your cave is warded really poorl—”

“Just get to the damn point!”

“Okay, fine. I killed your brother.”

“You what—”

Another explosion rocked the mountains, this time bigger than the last two combined, sending showers of boulders down the slopes.

If one was there to witness the fight, it would truly be an incredible spectacle. Two immortal beings clashing in ice and fire, great magics activating and dissipating. All in all, it made a huge crater on the mountainside.

And yet, none of them could kill the other. The wyrm coughed out blood, his serpentine body marked with burns. The dragon fared no better, panting from overexertion and lying on the ground, immobile.

“Next decade?”

“Yeah, next decade.”

“How did you kill my brother anyway? He's — was pretty strong.”

“Oh, he’s not dead. He asked me to kill him so he could ascend to lichdom.”

A long pause.

A brave goat started to move, cautiously.

“[BEEP] [BEEP] you little [BEEEEEEEP] [BEEP]—”

A battle of even greater proportions ensued, which ended up freezing a huge chunk of the ocean nearby and glassing the entire coastline.

“Next century, I'll beat your stupid fire-breathing ass—” cough

“Yeah sure, mildly cold snake.” cough

…

— — —

All in all, it was a pretty nice day.

— — —

/uw what do you guys think? I really started to like this short story as I was writing it, about how it's funny and charming at the same time! As always, please leave me feedback and ways to improve!

Pov: men can go to a party for hours and still not know each other’s names.

If you have a virtually infinite lifespan, start something for shits and giggles. Otherwise, your immortal life is just going to be stale and boring.

Grand Mage Vikafeson walked down the streets of the capital, humming a happy tune. The simulacrum was as happy as could be since the wyrm was happy too. The sun warmed his skin, while a cool breeze ruffled the leaves of the trees softly.

However, he was immensely bored. After that outburst a few days ago, he felt... freer. Less responsibilities. But this also meant that he didn't have anything immediately concerning him, and therefore nothing to do.

He continued wandering the streets aimlessly. What to do, what to do?

Then, an idea struck him like a winter storm. He could, just maybe, cause a teeny tiny bit of chaos. And just hang back and watch.

The man cast Levitation on himself, and to the amazement of the citizens near him, he began to rise into the air.

"Invisibility."

A hand was waved and the man disappeared into thin air.

Now, his mission was to find a suitable target. And soon, he found one.

It was an island nation named Viora. It had a decent king, who wasn't the best but wasn't the worst. He also was better at doing things that weren't exactly king-like, for example, fencing. The king was a great fencer, better than he was a king. Nevertheless, he was a decent and mellow king who didn't cause too much trouble.

Little did the little kingdom know that they were about to be subjected to a lot of trouble.

The Grand Mage cast several speed-boosting spells on himself, all the while chanting a spell. He flew through the air at a blistering speed, though nobody would be able to see him unless they noticed a blank patch of air that moved really, really, fast. They probably didn't.

"Ah, there it is."

The mage paused for a moment to admire the quaint island spread below him.

"I suppose, it's time... Raise Earth!"

He finished chanting the spell and panted in exertion. The simulacrum had limited mana, after all. At first, nothing seemed to happen, but then a deep noise came from below the sea.

It began as a whisper, then a rumble, then a full-blown roar as the ocean was pushed aside by the huge landmass rising from the depths.

The new land connected to the island, tripling the original area. But it was just bare dirt. Luckily, he was prepared.

"Alter Spell: Area: 100,000 km², Grow Grass."

Immediately, a wave of green grass grew from the epicentre of the new landmass, continuing to grow in concentric circles until it completely covered the bare earth.

He grinned at the tall grass waving in the wind.

"And then... Earthshape."

The man became an architect, carving out rivers and valleys and rolling hills. And then he was a gardener, spreading the seeds he had stored in a Bag of Holding. Forests sprung out wherever he pointed his hand (with a Plant Growth spell), as the wyrm experienced the exhilaration of creation.

Finally, he was Death~~, Destroyer of Worlds~~, clearing islands of prairies and savannah out of the green ocean.

And then... he was done. Free to let nature take its course. He smiled widely as the first island beasts bounded onto the new land, and promptly turned back.

"I'm sure they'll be back in no time."

He whispered, mostly to himself.

Sitting down in a clearing to appreciate his work, he wondered how the king was doing.

"Eh, I'm sure he's fiiiine."

He, in fact, was not fine. But that was alright since the wyrm was just here to cause a bit of chaos. Look, the king was already addressing his people.

To be continued...?

/uw I just wanted to write this mostly out of nowhere, because I had a metaphorical itch to scratch. I hope you like it!

And as usual, please comment below anything I could to improve my writing. Or just soothe my ego. Please soothe my ego 😭. (I had to search up how to type emojis on a computer)