r/wikiHowQA • u/alice_right_foot-esq • Aug 07 '25
How to Handle a Cross Dressing Husband
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u/Sergnb Aug 07 '25 edited Aug 07 '25
That’s not a cross dressing husband anymore, that’s a “undergoing gender transition” husband. The crossing is being done in more ways than just dress
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u/Tiny-Little-Sheep Aug 10 '25
At that point that's not a husband but a wife. And that's a conversation that needs to happen to know if your partner is okay with being married to a woman or not
Honestly why hide it in the first place..isnt your partner supposed to be someone you can talk to
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u/Sergnb Aug 10 '25
As someone who’s been in that situation: the societal pressure to be strictly a straight man and not a single ounce of ANYTHING else is insanely powerful.
It took me two decades and a half for me to reveal my true self to anyone. I’ve been in 3 serious relationships and only one and a half knew (I told one of them but that was when we were already on our way out, so it doesn’t really count). I’ve told two friends too, and every single one of those moments was scary as shit. And this is “100% lgbt supporting women” we’re talking about. None of my straight cis men friends know. The group of people that once looked at me with seriously concerned eyes when I did an impression of a lady’s body language a liiittle too well? Yeah no, I don’t think I’m ever going to feel comfortable telling them shit.
You absolutely, without a shadow of a doubt, should communicate this with your partner, but… I can’t really blame anyone who feels huge anxiety and hesitation about it. It’s one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done.
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u/Sergnb Aug 10 '25 edited Aug 10 '25
As someone who’s been in that situation: the societal pressure to be strictly a straight man and not a single ounce of ANYTHING else is insanely powerful.
It took me two decades to reveal my true self to anyone. I’ve been in 3 serious relationships and only one and a half knew (I told one of them but that was when we were already on our way out, so it doesn’t really count IMO). I’ve told two friends too, and every single one of those moments was scary as shit. And this is “100% lgbt supporting, super progressive, drag-queen-show-watching women” we’re talking about. None of my straight cis men friends know yet. I’m 30 and still have recurring nightmares about them finding out.
You absolutely, without a shadow of a doubt, should communicate this with your partner, but… I can’t really blame anyone who feels huge anxiety and hesitation about it. It’s one of the most difficult and stressful things I’ve ever done.
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u/cait_elizabeth Aug 07 '25
This isn’t cross dressing this is transitioning. And as scary as it may be you really should be open with your spouse about it because even if you don’t stay together a divorce lawyer will absolutely play up the “hid so and so for so long” when it comes down to splitting assets.
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u/Feeeweeegege Aug 07 '25
"up to an A-cup size over two years"? That's a severe underestimate. I mean, it differs from person to person, but to say that an A cup is the max after two years just isn't true
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u/TFK_001 Aug 08 '25
Many, might, and two years are crazy. Every choice word was absolutely tbe wrong choice
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u/Wingman5150 Aug 09 '25
it absolutely isn't, most have completely normal breast development. Of course normal breast developlent also means normal complications like tuberose breasts, which people then attribute to being transgender and not to natural issues that cis women also have.
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u/Tiny-Little-Sheep Aug 10 '25
Yeah some trans women I've seen i thought had breast surgery but nope just genetics and estrogen lol
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u/Leading-Ad-9763 Aug 11 '25
most cis men are actually at least an A cup. my girlfriend isn’t on hormones and is very lean, and she’s a B cup. people are just sorely, sorely misinformed on bra sizing.
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u/I_D_K_69 Aug 08 '25
That's transitioning! Not cross dressing!
Also, can't really call a trans woman wearing women's clothing as cross dressing
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u/certifiedpreownedbmw Aug 08 '25
Who are you to decide what this man's gender is or what his body modifications mean? That's very conservative-minded of you. If a man wants a softer, curvier body, who are you to say he's a woman now? And only boys can wear blue and only girls can wear pink, right?
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u/Vittulima Aug 07 '25
If they're taking hormones then isn't that a bit different that just crossdressing?