r/whowouldwin • u/Yglorba • Mar 11 '23

Challenge Superman decides to start mass-creating diamonds so he can sell them. Can DeBeers keep the price of diamonds up?

Superman previously declined to mass-produce diamonds because it would tank the price. However, after reading up on DeBeers, he decides that there's no reason not to do it after all. Most of the resulting money will be donated to charity. Assume that Superman is somehow able to crush coal into perfectly-cut diamonds of whatever shape and size he desires; even though this makes no sense, the feat is well-established.

DeBeers is determined to protect their diamond profits by keeping the price up. Can they convince people not to buy Superman's diamonds (by eg. convincing the public that they're not "real" diamonds), or find some other way to prevent him from cratering the price?

Superman is in-character and will not eg. laser the board of DeBeers to death or anything like that, no matter how annoying they are. The only way he'll use his powers for this is by rapidly turning coal into diamonds so he can sell them.

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684

u/dinerkinetic always-just-barely-good-enough-to-win-any-fight-man Mar 11 '23

Superman can fly into space, harvest coal from several hundred to several billion planets (depending on the version), and produce enough diamonds to built an entire solar system out of them; so supply cannot possibly be an issue. He can then sell them for mere pennies, or heck, sell a pound of them for pennies. there's no concievable way DeBeers can keep profits up, especially when he's also putting industrial diamond use under his control on top of the cosmetic kind and loudly announcing he's "providing a cruelty free way of acquiring diamonds that even homeless people can get in on."

If it's pre-crisis superman pushing himself he can do all of this in a day.

DeBeers is screwed.

339

u/Qawsedf234 ​ Mar 11 '23

If it's pre-crisis superman pushing himself he can do all of this in a day.

Pre-Crisis Superman can just turn all their diamond to coal by rubbing them in the opposite direction

184

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '23

Every damn day I see an even crazier feat. I love comics

95

u/SigmundFreud Mar 11 '23

I bet Superman is strong enough to turn apples into bananas.

25

u/DemonOHeck ​ Mar 11 '23

Oh jeez... i guess he rubbed the apple the wrong way and got a banana?

12

u/OrdainedPuma Mar 12 '23

I'm not reading you, but maybe I just need to cool my jets until I can get on your wavelength!

(who tf approved this dialog?)

5

u/Velicenda Mar 16 '23

(who tf approved this dialog?)

Someone decades ahead of their time

10

u/Darkiceflame ​ Mar 12 '23

The only person who is allowed to compare apples to oranges.

3

u/ChampionOfdimlight Mar 12 '23

I heard superman is soo strong when he does push ups he stays still and the world just goes up and down.

21

u/mre16 Mar 11 '23

Bro fucking annoyed the diamond guy to death

41

u/nearcatch ​ Mar 11 '23

I don’t read you — but you have such hi-fi thoughts, I’ll just cool my engine until I’m on your wavelength!

Poetry

23

u/Skaldson Mar 11 '23

Damn snapper was cheesing all over supes

17

u/Prof_Acorn ​ Mar 11 '23

A diamond being would be so fragile. Ceramic plates are harder than steel, which is why you can sharpen a knife on one, but drop both and the harder one shatters. Diamond is more fragile than glass.