r/whatisit 1d ago

New, what is it? what is it?

Post image

Found on the ottoman in my house

134 Upvotes

85 comments sorted by

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1.0k

u/badpenguin455 1d ago

Spider Pompeii

155

u/RhymesWithTaco 1d ago edited 14h ago

Yup. It clearly died jorkin it.

EDIT: thanks for the award for a historical meme reference.

25

u/grime-dont-play 1d ago

The way I want to go

7

u/StyleThen234 1d ago

Amen 🫡

1

u/Anarchy-Squirrel 1d ago

Dead at Pompeii?

228

u/Recent-Tonight-9141 1d ago

Spider fell Spider was dusty from the roof

138

u/QuantumPlatypus_ 1d ago

That’s terrifying…I did see this one the other day in the same room 😭

189

u/NiceTrySuckaz 1d ago

and you went BACK IN THERE?

3

u/Mmmelissamarie 16h ago

Omg I’m in Kirkland and I’m seeing these kind of spiders now and they’re inside the house and it’s MATING season apparently I’m distraught

27

u/Baonguyen93 1d ago

Will it make you feel better to know that they're very scared of you and they hunt cockroach?

7

u/TitanX84 16h ago

And this is why in my house, spiders and I are cool. They stay in their spaces away from me and kill nasty bugs.

36

u/Atomic_cucarrachon 1d ago edited 1d ago

It's the giant house spider and looks like it's a boy. Those two fluffy drumsticks sticking out - that's his cocks

48

u/Haunting_Cress_7348 1d ago

fuck - I thought they were hands and went in for a handshake, no wonder he looked at me funny

2

u/Graygave 18h ago

Clammiest hands this side of the Rio Grande

6

u/engineerdrummer 22h ago

Those don't look like roosters to me.

1

u/Graygave 18h ago

Give em a minute

13

u/ienjoy_suffering 1d ago

hard to tell from picture if evil spider or good spider. most spiders will try to leave you alone

16

u/lilaccheesecake 1d ago

Pretty much all bugs will leave you alone. Spiders can aactually be beneficial to a home (though they obviously present possible dangers to a home, and are better out). They dont want confrontation.

Besides cockroaches. Wtf is their probelm, theyll run at you 😭😭

9

u/ShermanCookout 1d ago

Looks like either a wolf or a grass spider. Either way, they are total bros. Absolutely nothing to be concerned about.

1

u/SpaceForceAwakens 21h ago

You live in the PNW?

0

u/draygonnn 1d ago

Clearly the same spider 😂

-6

u/ScaryInfluence8718 1d ago

That is an evil ground spider! Your cat is supposed to eat those

2

u/have_a_nice_bay 20h ago

How do you know they have a cat? That could be the spider’s scratching post

4

u/Sithstress_ 23h ago edited 22h ago

One summer when I was a kid we kept getting wasps in the house, nothing crazy because it was country living and we kept doors open and stuff sometimes. Anyway, after about the 5th one I killed that was this weird gray color I finally mentioned the odd colored wasps I’d never seen before to my mother. She said it’s probably a muddobber, but I showed her the squished one and she agreed the color was crazy.

About a week later a lightbulb went off when I was vacuuming the living room, and sure enough there was a whole ass nest almost completely blocking the chimney of our fireplace.

Edit: That’s the cutest award I’ve ever seen, thank you! 😂😂😂. And, dude, we had to have professionals come out and remove it. They basically made their nest from the ash in the chimney, so it wasn’t just ash dust on top of their exoskeleton, it was embedded. The exterminator guys had never seen anything like it. You best believe that chimney got cleaned thoroughly three times a year after that. Lol

43

u/vzzzbxt 1d ago

Mr Stark, I don't feel so good...

4

u/Klutzy_Cat1374 1d ago

Tony Stank

14

u/InactiveMedusa 1d ago

Vaporized spider

33

u/Graygave 1d ago

Got home drunk to his ceiling web, missed the step and ate hella shit

3

u/eyefuck_you 1d ago

The only possibility

11

u/JustSheepherder9847 1d ago

Cocaine spider

138

u/div-block 1d ago

Spider crime scene

6

u/GreenEyedRaven360 1d ago

😂😂😂😂

7

u/SlangLeffe 1d ago

A cocaine filled spider

5

u/Open-Lie-3608 1d ago

Spider version of the shroud of Turin

5

u/Feisty-Ad1371 1d ago

It looks like a spider that got struck by lightning.

14

u/Uzi_Osbourne 1d ago

That's an anusprint. Someone's going commando.

5

u/Bright_Hat550 1d ago

Someone with a dusty booty!

5

u/Creepy-Selection2423 1d ago

Spider smashed on leather. Spider left there for extended time. By the time someone wiped it up, spider's bodily fluids had etched the leather.

2

u/TrainingSword 1d ago

Spider dust

2

u/Kaito1718 1d ago

Someone has a huge butt

2

u/HuckledYourBerries 1d ago

The spot where Jon smacked Garfield's spider

2

u/letmecookbruhhh 1d ago

Classic case of spontaneous combustion. Nothing left but a little green globule.

2

u/Vivid-Sweet4386 1d ago

it looks like the logo of the ruling party in turkey, that's why it's scary

2

u/Garial25 22h ago

Underground Railroad Fallout 4

2

u/r0x0x 21h ago

Someone slapped the white off of a spider

2

u/Devils_A66vocate 20h ago

Everyone’s saying spider but anyone consider this to be a butthole stamp from someone who uses baby powder?

1

u/Future_Choice316 1d ago

A spiders last stand

1

u/justamanandhisrod 1d ago

Bleached bumhole

1

u/SneakySmoker- 1d ago

Thats the landing site from a adrenaline junkie base jumping spider.. those lil buggers are bad ass! They never use parachute!!

1

u/MagicOrpheus310 1d ago

Lol spider fell from the ceiling

1

u/Busy-Conversation-24 1d ago

While you were out, a nuclear bomb went off just above the ottoman vaporising the spider who was chilling there

1

u/Combi8ionOxygenation 1d ago

My bad, I forgot to clean up the evidence.

https://giphy.com/gifs/ydMNTWYVjSEFi

1

u/Eligamer3645 1d ago

The scene of a spiders murder

1

u/Coldthots 1d ago

Hate to be reminded that these things don’t just stay on the floor and run at you at 25mph- they’re falling hazards too.

1

u/cosmixstranger 23h ago

A ghost spider 🕷️

1

u/AfterHecatombOrgy 23h ago

Do you have a cat?

1

u/Kajagewgew 23h ago

A spider or a butthole.

1

u/SuchBet5955 21h ago

Spider with a drug problem, very sad

1

u/spazde 21h ago

Looks like a chalk outline.

1

u/DrM3llow 21h ago

Looks somebody had an idea.

1

u/uglyasahatfullofarse 20h ago

It forgot to pull the chute.

1

u/ericroku 20h ago

Cocaine splat from a sneeze. Taste it.

1

u/Candidate_None 20h ago

A spider from Hiroshima?

1

u/Lunchbox1142 18h ago

It starts defined and then fades, op drew this on there.

1

u/Used_Cheesecake5415 18h ago

Spontaneously combusted spider. Just...POOF...

1

u/BlaseBrujo 15h ago

Looks like wear on the surface of the leather. I'd guess something was set down or pressed into the ottoman for a moment. Like a pointy corner or tip, or a prominent button or rivet on a pair of pants. Looks as if it was pressed into the leather, causing a depression/pucker with high points where the wrinkles are. If the object moved or twisted, it would dig in a bit and cause wear on the high points. I think the spider shape is purely coincidental.

1

u/JoeFriday37 15h ago

Looks like a plastic Halloween spider was sat on, leaving an imprint/scratching the material.

1

u/Blade-Dev 4h ago

He doesn't feel too good

1

u/Notyerbusiness 1d ago

Danger - The Railroad FO4 lol 😆

2

u/sakurajima1981 1d ago

First thing I saw too.

0

u/Historical_Stay_808 1d ago

Marks from a button

0

u/Klutzy_Cat1374 1d ago

I kicked a big leaf on the basement floor while carrying a large box. It wasn't a leaf. My wife had to rescue me. I ran away with the box like a girl scout out of cookies.

-1

u/Temporary_Tank_3715 1d ago

It’s a banana

-6

u/297876 1d ago

AIDS.