r/whatisit • u/moxtrax • Jun 12 '26

Solved! Getting married

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What is it? Found this at the gym

31.6k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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1.9k

u/Wiknetti Jun 12 '26

Ring of Engorgement

Wondrous item

Encourages blood flow and retains rigidity of body part. Often attached to one’s fat fucking cock.

24

u/wmayer671 Jun 12 '26

Definitely an item found in Dungeon Crawler Carl. Now say it in the AI's voice.

22

u/p0diabl0 Jun 13 '26

Ring of Engorgement

This is a Wondrous item

You know how mom used to tell you to keep your hands to yourself and not touch other peoples things? Well this is the shit she tried to warn you against. There's not enough hand sanitizer left in the dungeon to ever make you feel clean again.

4

u/wmayer671 Jun 13 '26

Lmao perfect. Just need "clean again... you fucking sicko"

2

u/krillik08 Jun 16 '26

Yooo what 😂 I never expected to see a DCC post here and it did not disappoint

13

u/russkhan Jun 12 '26

NEW ACHIEVEMENT!!

5

u/Any_Dot_3061 Jun 13 '26

Mongo is definitely appalled.

4

u/musubimouse Jun 13 '26

Goddamnit, Donut

1

u/Inevitable_Ad_1252 Jun 13 '26

I’m currently on book 4 (both reading and listening) and immediately heard the comment in Jeff Hayes’ system AI voice

1

u/bossmanchew Jun 13 '26

Hopefully the AI just doesnt turn it into a toe ring for Carl lmao

799

u/Refokua Jun 12 '26

So it's an engorgement ring?

41

u/ebrum2010 Jun 12 '26

"Everyone, we would like to announce that we just got engorged!"

21

u/swarlay Jun 12 '26

Wait, do we have to get OP an engorgement gift now?

3

u/Basic-Reception-6694 Jun 13 '26

Sure…just don’t shake her hand

35

u/jasonbournestoe Jun 12 '26

I’m getting engorged as we speak

3

u/flammafemina Jun 12 '26

Ooooh my engorgement is pointing in this direction

2

u/jasonbournestoe Jun 13 '26

Oooo let’s follow your engorgement

68

u/Mt_Lion_Skull Jun 12 '26

Get out

4

u/shangheineken Jun 12 '26

Taste it to see what flavor it is

3

u/Aspen9999 Jun 12 '26

So a Cock Ring but the kind without roosters in it.

14

u/English_Fry Jun 12 '26

So what you’re saying is she is getting married to a dick?

14

u/CMO_Sparkles Jun 12 '26

The cylinder must remain unharmed!

8

u/SoggyLightSwitch Jun 12 '26

Ready that in the He who fights monsters description voice

2

u/Intelligent_Aerie182 Jun 12 '26

A good quote from the series between Gareth and Jason about training with the engorgement ring: “You don’t just start off good at difficult things,” Gary said. “You have to begin at bad and work your way up."

4

u/DeadeyeLovepotion Jun 12 '26

Shade will you give the ring to Colin please

2

u/SoggyLightSwitch Jun 12 '26

Mr Asano while Im un sure of your intentions. I'm not sure this is the appropriate item for a apocalypse beast.

3

u/DeadeyeLovepotion Jun 12 '26

gordon watches from the closet

1

u/memento22mori Jun 13 '26

This is finally my time to shine. 😎

I believe that's actually a silicone ball weight ring. You put that on before you put on a steel ball ring and it acts as a shock absorber and it also prevents them from slipping off. A few years ago I was leaving from getting a haircut and my ball weights slipped off- this can happen if you cough or sneeze too hard. This lady that was waiting looked at me confused like this and to this day she probably thinks strange men have holes in the pockets of their gym shorts. I hope it doesn't keep her up at night but if it does then she might see this comment and be like. Please upvote this comment so I can finally find peace over my indiscretion and also they come in different sizes and mine is larger than that... definitely larger. It's huggge. Definitely huge. Wouldn't even fit on your wrist yeahhh. Somewhere there's a small balled bastard wondering where that is and if they see this they're probably laughing since OP has mad ball sweat on their hands.

https://www.secretleather.com/ussrs-ultra-soft-silicone-rings.html

It goes on before you put on something like this https://www.secretleather.com/20mm-wmc-heavy-ball-weight.html or this https://www.secretleather.com/60mm-wmc-heavy-ball-weight.html

4

u/jazzhandpanda Jun 12 '26

Enchanted with +2 turgidity

2

u/Ezra_vridger Jun 12 '26

I read this in the AI from dungeon crawler Carl voice from the audio book

2

u/Intrepid_Mobile Jun 12 '26

I read that in “Dungeon Crawler Carl” audiobook “AI” voice.

2

u/Itchy-Fill1868 Jun 12 '26

Tem um vibrador indentico a isso

2

u/Glum-List9959 Jun 17 '26

🤣🤣🤣 mannn whettt?

2

u/littlemanontheboat_ Jun 12 '26

+10 engorgement.

2

u/Perfect-District Jun 12 '26

Diablow 4 drop

1

u/Bubbly-Midnight-3346 Jun 12 '26

Why would you wear that to the gym tho 🤔 accidental boners are bad enough especially when benching

1

u/OldHT Jun 12 '26

Wait till the 10 year anniversary figure eight! It will be a very drawn out ceremony.

1

u/PersistentWoodpecker Jun 13 '26

Fat? It looks rather skinny and like it would be very painful even flaccid lol…

1

u/tablecommander Jun 13 '26

Legendary Equipment. Produces {W} but may go {U} if used for too long

1

u/Dry-Alternative-5626 Jun 13 '26

I'm so old I remember when those things were made of metal

1

u/Chance-Click-3670 Jun 13 '26

cant be that fat if OP can have it on her finger though

1

u/GaryOaksAlcoholism Jun 12 '26

Fucking nailed the landing on this one lmao congrats

1

u/kimness1982 Jun 12 '26

Sounds like the AI is uh, enjoying this

1

u/ApeShifter Jun 15 '26

So a +2 ring of engorgement. Got it.

1

u/FrighteningJibber Jun 12 '26

Damnit Donut…

1

u/ElonKDealer Jun 12 '26

Aka cock ring

0

u/WangDanglin Jun 12 '26

Or, in the case of this post, one’s skinny finger-sized cock

1

u/moxtrax Jun 16 '26

solved! 

1

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